Page 4 | This is really bad isn't it?

Getafuckinggripman · 2021-04-30T14:36:48+00:00

I drink prosecco at the weekend. Probably 3 or 4 bottles spread out from Friday afternoon to Sunday. I don't touch alcohol during the week, never hungover for work, drink loads of water during the week etc. Don't really think about alcohol as I'm in routine etc. It's just a weekend thing. However... I've been off this week and other than one night I've been on it every day. Probably 15/20 units each day. It'll stop when I'm back to normal next week, I don't get the shakes or wake up needing a drink or anything but it'll get to 5pm today and I'll think about cracking one open to take the edge off. If I couldn't physically get any wine I would be a bit pissed off but I wouldn't be licking yesterday's wine glass or anything. I was the same during Christmas week and it stopped as soon as I went back to work. Am I an alcoholic or something?!

Rubyrecka · 30/04/2021 16:36

@DinosaurDiana to be honest I thought your post may have been a typo! Clearly not.

If you think that alcoholics can go with out alcohol when it's suits them then your living on another planet and have a totally lack of understanding around addiction. People die from it - it's not quite so black and white.

MindGrapes · 30/04/2021 16:37

Actually, shit, I think one of my friends could have posted your exact posts. (I'm assuming my friend is not on MN!). Their friends all know they have a problem but don't like to mention it.

GreyhoundG1rl · 30/04/2021 16:38

[quote Rubyrecka]@DinosaurDiana to be honest I thought your post may have been a typo! Clearly not.

If you think that alcoholics can go with out alcohol when it's suits them then your living on another planet and have a totally lack of understanding around addiction. People die from it - it's not quite so black and white. [/quote]
Not all alcoholics are lying in the gutter drinking meths, you know?
I think it's you who has no real idea.

MarieIVanArkleStinks · 30/04/2021 16:39

@Getafuckinggripman

My family and friends do not have a clue and I wouldn't tell them - it's embarrassing and I know it's wrong to be drinking this much hence why I'm here. But I would like to have thought it's just a bit of an annual leave binge rather than a serious drinking problem

3-4 bottles a weekend is a problem even without the current deviation from your usual pattern, OP. When I was the one in that position I was frightened. I knew it couldn't continue.

Denial is your worst enemy. The more of a problem you have, the more that little devil on your shoulder will shriek in your ear that you don't have a problem. It's possibly the worst symptom - and it is a recognized symptom.

camaleon · 30/04/2021 16:40

The secret drinking is a massive red flag. But I do think (as I have said and others too) that you totally know it.

Please remove the shame from this. I repeat: alcohol is addictive. You would not be surprised if you got addicted to cigarettes if you were smoking 40 cigarettes 'only' the weekends. And yes, some people (very few) seem able to do this. It is still horrible for their health

Like @Northernsoullover, I am a former drinker. I don't have a problem with alcohol because I don't drink it anymore. I was abusing it, hiding it, making a lot of space in my mind for alcohol: when to buy it, when to drink it, how to hide it, recovery, start again.

There is no one type of 'alcoholic'. There is a progression to a very dark place that a minority goes too. The issue remains that nobody asks whether they have a problem with alcohol, or monitor if they got 'the shakes' if they are not already in quite a bit of trouble.

camaleon · 30/04/2021 16:41

And by the way.. nobody knew about my alcohol issue. Not even my husband. He was utterly surprised by it when I decided to stop and 'confess'

Rubyrecka · 30/04/2021 16:44

@GreyhoundG1rl

I don't think it is, actually.

People can be functioning alcoholics, perfectly capable of holding quite responsible positions and working long hours without drinking on the job.
It doesn't make their alcoholism any less real.

I don't get your point here? I agree that it doesn't make their alcoholism any less real. I don't agree with the 'they can stop when it suits them'. Many people are and can be a functioning alcoholic. Until they're not. All becos they can hold down a job and not drink in that time period, doesn't mean they can stop when it suits them becos they don't. They're in a cycle of addiction. People seem to think unless your homeless and are pissed up everyday they don't have a problem and it's all down to will power.

Seeline · 30/04/2021 16:54

Your weekend drinking is way too much on its own!

The annual leave binge drinking is another level.

GreyhoundG1rl · 30/04/2021 16:55

[quote Rubyrecka]@GreyhoundG1rl

I don't think it is, actually.

People can be functioning alcoholics, perfectly capable of holding quite responsible positions and working long hours without drinking on the job.
It doesn't make their alcoholism any less real.

I don't get your point here? I agree that it doesn't make their alcoholism any less real. I don't agree with the 'they can stop when it suits them'. Many people are and can be a functioning alcoholic. Until they're not. All becos they can hold down a job and not drink in that time period, doesn't mean they can stop when it suits them becos they don't. They're in a cycle of addiction. People seem to think unless your homeless and are pissed up everyday they don't have a problem and it's all down to will power. [/quote]
The original quote (which wasn't mine, btw) was "go without" when it suits them. If you've interpreted that as stop completely, at will, we're at cross purposes.

AmyG10 · 30/04/2021 16:56

I personally don’t think this is over the top as you are only doing it whilst you are on a holiday from work. You’re spreading it over time so not necking it all in one night. Would be excessive if you were doing it alllll the time but you’re not. Think of people who drink all day at resorts abroad, they’re on holiday just because you’re at home it’s no different. If you think it’s an issue of affecting you then cut back see how you feel

TatianaBis · 30/04/2021 16:57

A drink problem is a drink problem. There’s a sliding scale and you’re definitely on it.

No-one wants to think of themselves as an addict, acknowledgment of it is a big first step.

As to Saturday nights - as someone who’s never drunk much I can’t imagine how alcohol would make them more exciting. Surely it’s the same night whether you’re drunk or sober.

TatianaBis · 30/04/2021 16:58

The issue remains that nobody asks whether they have a problem with alcohol, or monitor if they got 'the shakes' if they are not already in quite a bit of trouble.

Yep.

Original poster

Getafuckinggripman · 30/04/2021 17:00

No-one wants to think of themselves as an addict, acknowledgment of it is a big first step.

If I was an addict surely I'd be on it every single day of the year? Not being defensive just genuinely wondering x

OP posts:

SunshineCake · 30/04/2021 17:01

What do you want from this thread as the few posts I have read so far you have an answer for everything?

GreyhoundG1rl · 30/04/2021 17:01

@Getafuckinggripman

No-one wants to think of themselves as an addict, acknowledgment of it is a big first step.

If I was an addict surely I'd be on it every single day of the year? Not being defensive just genuinely wondering x

Not necessarily.

Aposterhasnoname · 30/04/2021 17:02

[quote harriethoyle]@Aposterhasnoname they sound lush... have you got a link to them so I know what to look out for?[/quote]
Sadly not, can’t find them on line at all. Here’s a photo of the shelf though.

AmyG10 · 30/04/2021 17:03

I’ve just re-read the bit about EVERY weekend so I take back my comment to an extent. Every weekend is an awful lot I thought it was just because you were on holiday. I’d be careful, definitely try and at least cut down

BlackSwan · 30/04/2021 17:04

This is alcoholism. Don't kid yourself.

Original poster

Getafuckinggripman · 30/04/2021 17:05

What do you want from this thread as the few posts I have read so far you have an answer for everything?

I wanted to anonymously admit how much I drink both at weekends and pretty much every day if I'm on holiday. I genuinely wasn't sure if the majority would say "you're an alcoholic" or "ah fuck it you're on holiday and weekend drinking is nothing" ... I now know

OP posts:

Rubyrecka · 30/04/2021 17:06

@Getafuckinggripman

No-one wants to think of themselves as an addict, acknowledgment of it is a big first step.

If I was an addict surely I'd be on it every single day of the year? Not being defensive just genuinely wondering x

This is the problem. People seem to think that you have had to hit rock bottom to be considered an addict. E.g. be drinking every single day, losing your job, not looking after yourself and basically being a hot mess. If you can still hold a job and go to the gym then surely your ok?? Not so.

People don't just become full blown alcoholics over night. It's gradual and insidious.

Sleepingdogs12 · 30/04/2021 17:07

You are questioning yourself so I would say you should reign it in a bit. It is very easy for this to escalate. Good job you are conscious that you might need to watch it abit.

Immaback · 30/04/2021 17:08

Google the alcohol experiment and give it a go. It’s basically 30 days without it and it makes you see things more clearly and understand why you drink. It’s free too!

Amdone123 · 30/04/2021 17:08

@Aposterhasnoname, thanks for this. They look great. I like to have af drinks in. If I can have a couple before tea, I find i no longer want to drink.

MintyCedric · 30/04/2021 17:08

I get it.

My consumption had gone from one bottle over the weekend to 2/3 a week since lockdown (not helped by a long term, stressful family situation), and definitely more over Christmas etc.

Dry January lasted 5 days and then I was back to usual.

What broke my habit was a friend having to stop drinking due to a change in medication for a serious health condition. I decided not to drink either for the first couple of weeks to keep him company...we sent lots of messages trying out non-alcoholic alternatives (beers are ok, NA wine is disgusting!).

I'm drinking again now but am back to a bottle over the course of the weekend and none in the week.

It's sounds like you need some more support/distraction to counteract the temptation which is understandable...and it's not like there's much else to do atm, buy it seems like you would benefit from a break.

Mmn654123 · 30/04/2021 17:09

@Getafuckinggripman

No-one wants to think of themselves as an addict, acknowledgment of it is a big first step.

If I was an addict surely I'd be on it every single day of the year? Not being defensive just genuinely wondering x

Afraid not. Lots of alcoholics are functional alcoholics. They can work. They can limit their drinking to weekends. Or even less often.

The fact that you ‘cracked’ after two weeks would suggest you are dependent on alcohol. The fact that you are ‘bored’ without alcohol suggests you are dependent on alcohol.

That feeling you get when you want to take the edge off is probably called craving.

I can’t tell you if you are an alcoholic but you may be heading in that direction.

Answer this honestly - and act on what it tells you.

www.drinkaware.co.uk/tools/self-assessment