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Original poster

Just in case anyone needs to hear this, stick your fingers up a dogs arsehole

109 replies

LaurieFairyCake · 22/04/2021 13:13

Chat reaches more people than the doghouse.

Unfortunately a small pug was killed by a larger dog in Wolverhampton today Sad (loads of people tried really hard to intervene) It's also happened a couple of times near me (in Greenwich park and Crystal Palace park)

This happens occasionally and if you see it happening stick your fingers firmly up the anus of the dog being aggressive - they will very likely let go.

It's not fun, it is revolting. But it may save a dogs life if more people know about it.

OP posts:
Whatflavourjellybabyisnice · 22/04/2021 17:30

[quote MintyCedric]I thought the Spitting Image team had released a new song Confused

[/quote] '....and pretend your name is Keith!!!!' Grin
Frop · 22/04/2021 17:35

@corlan

This thread has me in stitches and I don't even have a dog 😅
Same here 🤣
MonkeyNotOrgangrinder · 22/04/2021 17:42

I'm not a dog owner, but tbh I think I'd rather let my dog take its chances than stick my finger up a dog's arse. What a disgusting suggestion 🤮

Howyoudoingirl · 22/04/2021 17:47

Got it👍. If I see an aggressive dog I'm going to run up & try to stick my fingers up its arse😄

Woeismethischristmas · 22/04/2021 17:56

I feel like it’s a punch the shark in the nose thing. It might work but ain’t going to happen

Original poster
LaurieFairyCake · 22/04/2021 18:10

When I started this thread it was reported the dog died, it's only subsequently that thankfully the Pug survived

OP posts:
SchrodingersPomp · 22/04/2021 18:19

I've had a small dog which was, at different times, the dog doing the attacking and the dog being attacked. Can confirm from experience that in all the panic and the noise and the fear, you are a) very likely to get bitten and b) unlikely to be able to pop a finger in a dog's arsehole.

MrBond · 22/04/2021 18:46

I'd also like to say that most people find their threads through 'active threads' and any thread containing the words, 'stick your fingers up a dog's arsehole' will attract traffic whichever board it's on.

ginandbearit · 22/04/2021 19:09

I was told by an old military tupe that the thing to do was to pull the dog's front legs apart as fiercly as possible as it crushes the heart...how you'd get close enough to do that was never explained...

MrBond · 22/04/2021 19:20

@ginandbearit

I was told by an old military tupe that the thing to do was to pull the dog's front legs apart as fiercly as possible as it crushes the heart...how you'd get close enough to do that was never explained...
If you're trying to kill the dog/stop it at all costs, straddle it, arms around the neck, yank backwards with all your strength suddenly. You're trying to snap the neck. I'd only use that if it was attacking a person though.
Sick · 22/04/2021 19:24

@ginandbearit

I was told by an old military tupe that the thing to do was to pull the dog's front legs apart as fiercly as possible as it crushes the heart...how you'd get close enough to do that was never explained...
Yeah, that's just as stupid as the OP's "advice" really.

Like others have already said, if you ever have to break up a dog fight then the wheelbarrow method is best, every dog owner should look up how to do it correctly. Also drenching them with a hosepipe/bucket of water etc. Or really loud noises (not screaming!) or even covering the aggressor with a blanket. Don't get your hands/face anywhere near them!

bottyg · 22/04/2021 19:25

I feel like it’s a punch the shark in the nose thing. It might work but ain’t going to happen

Go for the sharks eyeballs/gills if your in it's mouth & your arms are free

ShirleyPhallus · 22/04/2021 19:32

Has this thread really gone from (frankly hilarious) jokes about wheelbarrow races with a dog to actual advice on how to kill a dog?! Actually??

WorkPhobic · 22/04/2021 19:42

@ShirleyPhallus

Has this thread really gone from (frankly hilarious) jokes about wheelbarrow races with a dog to actual advice on how to kill a dog?! Actually??
Fucking insane!! Giving advice about how to snap a dogs neck or crush its heart. Bonkers.
MrBond · 22/04/2021 19:44

@ShirleyPhallus

Has this thread really gone from (frankly hilarious) jokes about wheelbarrow races with a dog to actual advice on how to kill a dog?! Actually??
Well, it's a fairly natural progression when you think about it. It was a thread about stopping dog attacks. Different methods were discussed. Killing a dog is one way to stop it attacking.

Why the disbelief?

16purplecolour16 · 22/04/2021 19:53

@bottyg: A dog attacked my uncles dog, he booted it across the park. That seemed effective!

Yep! Reckon that’ll do it. GrinGrinGrin

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 22/04/2021 20:00

@bottyg

I feel like it’s a punch the shark in the nose thing. It might work but ain’t going to happen

Go for the sharks eyeballs/gills if your in it's mouth & your arms are free

Could you stick a finger up its arse?
Mumsnut · 22/04/2021 20:14

Someone on the Sammy seal thread reported that a snooker cue where the sun don’t shine ended a dog attack she witnessed

ShirleyPhallus · 22/04/2021 20:20

Well, it's a fairly natural progression when you think about it. It was a thread about stopping dog attacks. Different methods were discussed. Killing a dog is one way to stop it attacking.

Why the disbelief?

Errrr because that’s such a fucking weird leap to make. A natural response to someone asking a question about something is not to give tips on how to kill it Confused

billy1966 · 22/04/2021 20:25

@DShrute

I think it works on people fighting in pubs too
Gosh, but that made me laugh🙏
MrBond · 22/04/2021 20:33

@ShirleyPhallus

Well, it's a fairly natural progression when you think about it. It was a thread about stopping dog attacks. Different methods were discussed. Killing a dog is one way to stop it attacking.

Why the disbelief?

Errrr because that’s such a fucking weird leap to make. A natural response to someone asking a question about something is not to give tips on how to kill it Confused

How is it a weird leap to make when you're talking about a way to stop a dog? It was originally intended as a serious thread, and went:

Finger into dog anus to stop dog-> impractical advice you wouldn't/couldn't carry out in the moment (punching shark) -> pulling apart dog legs (continuation of impractical advice you couldn't realistically carry out in the moment) -> better way of stopping dog if chips are down.

Tbh, given dog attack threads we've seen on here in recent weeks, I think it's pretty prudent to know how to stop an attacking dog. I don't have a dog but do have a toddler and if a dog attacked one of my kids, I wouldn't be trying to get acquainted with its anal sphincter or enter a wheelbarrow race with it, I can tell you that much.

JeffreyJefferson · 22/04/2021 20:43

no thanks luv

bottyg · 22/04/2021 20:48

Could you stick a finger up its arse?

You could try! 😆

Nanasueathome · 22/04/2021 20:49

The incident with the pug and staffie is reported in the daily mail
It happened 9th April and although the pug was attacked it has survived, which is very good news

bottyg · 22/04/2021 20:49

Why the disbelief?

Unsure seems like natural progression imo.

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