Kids playing outside

[Jiggy16]

Trying not to be a grouch, what time do people feel is acceptable for kids (10/15 maybe around the age 10ish?) playing outside in the evening, shouting and loud singing, sometimes with whistles.

Alice - I mean this kindly but I think you are allowing your own negative childhood experiences to affect your judgement of modern day childhood and risk taking.

It does sound like you had some unpleasant experiences as a child. Why didn’t you tell your parents? Surely if other children were mean to your dog, you should have told your parents and they could have taken action?
As you say bullying can happen anywhere, whether at school, or online, or in the street or park, or even at after school clubs. The important thing is that children know what to do, and have a trusted adult that they feel safe talking to about any problems and who they know will deal with the issue appropriately.

@Aliceandthemarchhare They probably shouldn’t have strictly speaking been doing that.

I live in Scotland so no restrictions on under 12s so they absolutely should have been doing that.

I don’t think I am wanda ... I think there are a lot of things children don’t tell their parents. Sometimes they don’t know how, sometimes it’s so ‘normal’ it doesn’t even register as an event in the sense that we would pass that information on.

The dog was actually a bit different, I was only maybe about five at the time as I remember my dad going to sort it. Dog escaped and I am fairly sure that the children started just letting him but then someone maybe pulled his ears a bit too much or his tail ... and it turned into out and out cruelty.

I love children. I work with them and i think I always will. But I also know that the world of children is not that of adults. I don’t think children should have constant supervision but there is a difference between free play in a garden or a playground and free play on the street.

In any event it just doesn’t happen here. I don’t intend that to sound snobbish or anything, so if anyone decides that’s my meaning it’s their interpretation not my intention. There is a park and children play there but not on the street.

Fair enough ginty and it annoys me when Mnetters assume everyone is in England so I’ll apologise for assuming

@midnightstar66

But one of the reasons my kids aren't on the street is they attend a lot of extra curricular activities so don't have loads of "hanging around" time. Maybe that is quite middle class.

Here's a bizarre concept - it's possible to do BOTH

Of course it's possible to do both, it has nothing to do with class. All kids need some free time, mine and their friends certainly did and enjoyed themselves. When I look back at some of the impromptu concerts in the back garden I feel quite nostalgic.

I definitely dont think its always safe to play outside all the time as kids, but the point is, that its also not safe in other ways to not go out.
Honestly, when i talk to some of my childhood friends, we practically had a feral childhood in the 80s. We had our run of the entire estate. In so many ways it was brilliant. We climbed, we made dens, we paddled, caught toads and fish, rode bikes, skated out we broke into abandoned buildings, building sites got into so much mischief, played bulldog with other kids from the area. It was honestly a charmed life in my memory.

Also broke bones, teeth, got into danger, got flashed by perverts. There was peer on peer sexual abuse, there was bullying, vandalism, accidents.

I didnt let mine play out alone as younger children, for various reasons, some of which i regret, but it just feels like different times. We dont live on an estate so hardly any kids play out, but i really think that the dangers of playing out are physical, but the internet generation are in danger in other ways

the internet generation are in danger in other ways
Yes, the only children I know of nowadays who have been flashed by perverts were online at the time. But at least they were at home and not on the streets heh....

@Wandamakestoast

the internet generation are in danger in other ways Yes, the only children I know of nowadays who have been flashed by perverts were online at the time. But at least they were at home and not on the streets heh....

This

What is with the constant use of ‘feral’?

@LemonRoses

I dislike gang culture and children playing in the street or left ‘hanging around’. Peer pressure can be quite powerful and mischief for one is fun for another is minor criminal activity or disturbances for someone else.

No laws to stop them but there should be consideration of others. You don’t need yobbishness to have fun. Shouting and blowing whistles outside somebody’s house in the evening is unacceptable and intrusive.
Loud classical music works. A decent Wagner or Bach with the window open.

My brother and I played outside in the street as kids (him more than me, I was a bookish child). Neither of us got involved in gang culture. We lived in Brighton, not Brixton, but still. I thought kids playing outside was a GOOD thing, given how many people complain about Kids These Days And Their Screens.

Sounds like they're enjoying themselves. I'd say they go in when the parents bring them in. But then life is noisy so it wouldn't bother me.

Round my way there's someone working on building an extension to their house. It's VERY noisy and they start as soon as it gets daylight. But I appreciate they're trying to get as much done as possible while we have a long dry spell, and that lockdown impacted their timescale, so I'm not about to get wound up about it.

Same goes for kids playing.

@Jamboree01

What is with the constant use of ‘feral’?

Whats wrong with it. Its a common phrase and we all know what it means surely?

Domesticated but returned to wilder less tamed ways due to lack of supervision.

Its said lightheartedly usually but obviously depends on the context of the post

Yes, we surely know what it means. Especially in the context of the posts here.

@Jamboree01

Yes, we surely know what it means. Especially in the context of the posts here.

Perhaps people have more limited experience and haven’t seen young people who start off with very limited opportunities because they are left to ‘play out’ for extended periods and this progresses to smoking, drinking and delinquent behaviour. Parents just leave them to it.

That’s a long way from James being allowed to play tennis with Callum for an hour, after his homework is finished and before supper, in the safety of the turning circle of a cul de sac. Sadly the former is all too common.

Branleuse: feral=
Domesticated but returned to wilder less tamed ways due to lack of supervision.
......
I would have loved to have been like that!

@LemonRoses that's hugely assumptive!! I played out unattended with my siblings as did other kids in my area. I don't smoke, have never even considered trying drugs, and only occasionally enjoy a glass of wine. I went to university. As did my brother. As did our friends and wider social circle. It was common during the eighties to play out properly!

My DC (4 of whom are now young adults) were always allowed to play out unsupervised and none of them have turned it anywhere hear how you describe, they don't smoke or take drugs, they went to uni and have stable jobs and partners.

Your post is classist. And also wrong.

KurtWilde perhaps, but born out by statistical research. Since I’m told all classes play freely in the streets and we can’t assume it’s an ‘estate’ issue, how can that then be a classist assumption.
Lots of people drink and drive - the majority don’t die or kill anybody. That doesn’t negate the fact drinking and driving is high risk. Anecdotes don’t outweigh evidence. I’m delighted yours have done well; many don’t.

Kids playing out is a GOOD thing.

Whistles are not and would be told to pack it in, or to go home & do it outside their own house. Same with screaming. Shouting when playing fine, occasional scream fine, but a screech off is not fine.

I have several sets of neighbours over the back fence who I wish would send their kids out to play 🤣🤣. One set in particular has a trampoline and a swimming pool up near our back fence. There's never a minutes peace from April to October (out of school hours anyway). It would be nice if they occasionally went to the friends to play!!

But worse are the older ones next door with the table tennis table and general 'friends over' horsing around! Parents are inconsiderate twats though, so it's hardly surprising!

Completely agree.

The fact that people still, not only think like @LemonRoses
but speak is pretty depressing

@LemonRoses

KurtWilde perhaps, but born out by statistical research. Since I’m told all classes play freely in the streets and we can’t assume it’s an ‘estate’ issue, how can that then be a classist assumption. Lots of people drink and drive - the majority don’t die or kill anybody. That doesn’t negate the fact drinking and driving is high risk. Anecdotes don’t outweigh evidence. I’m delighted yours have done well; many don’t.

Your opinion is outdated.

callum playing tennis

LemonRoses doesn’t believe a word of what lemonRoses is saying. LemonRoses is doing what us neglectful parents call shitstirring.

@GintyMcGinty

They socialise plenty, with their school friends, and with friends from their extra curricular activities.

Where I live schools have only just gone back 2 weeks ago and before that they were stuck in home school for 4 months so no opportunity to socialise with school friends.

Most extra curricular activities have been off since the pandemic began. Cubs and football have had little spurts of opening when not in complete lockdown. So no opportunities to socialise with friends from these activities.

So in the last 13 months the opportunities for child socialising have pretty much been limited to going out to play.

@GintyMcGinty

I'm talking generally, not about lockdown. During lockdown they weren't socialising with anyone anywhere except on zoom, like anyone else who wasn't breaking the law.....

If the children in the OP were socialising outside of their households in the street during lockdown they were breaking the law, and I don't believe that's what the OP was saying.

you must live in some weird gated community out in the sticks past the back of beyond if you have never seen children playing out in Britain

I'm not sure if the precise location of Brigadoon has ever been established.

We played out as children (inner city shock horror) as did my now adult DC. The "gangs" we played with were our neighbours and friends, my DC were the same.

Astonishly none of us grew up to be criminals or delinquents. We did learn a great deal about independence, responsibility to each other (staying together was a condition of being allowed out) and the consequences of not being home in time or coming in when called!

Obviously I should have kept the children indoors with screens (no risk there...) and permitted them to play with carefully selected peers under my direct sight line until they were 18.

Later in the Summer than Winter but bedtime was the main fac

If the children in the OP were socialising outside of their households in the street during lockdown they were breaking the law, and I don't believe that's what the OP was saying.

My dc have been socialising in groups perfectly legally for the last year . Everyone does not live exactly where you do

But @LemonRoses your 'statistical research' is purely based on dc who are in a cycle of poverty and/or high risk home lives. You are confusing correlation with causation. The cause of the outcomes are the extreme poverty cycle (not just being on a low wage), neglect, abuse, living with addiction etc. The roaming the streets is just an additional factor and often a direct result - ie a child suffering abuse may not go home out of fear, be hungry then have to steal. None of this is due to going out to play!