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Original poster

Oh fuck, massive slow burning sexual tension

102 replies

Shesellsnotmuch · 31/03/2021 23:31

New job. Two weeks in. Introduced to a male colleague and the floor nearly fell out underneath me. Call it what you want, angels were fucking singing, time stopped, instant massive sexual pit of the stomach attraction, gravitational pull of epic proportions.

Neither of us single. I don’t go near married men as a hard line even when I was single. I know the advise; imagine him picking his nose, imagine his dirty pants on the floor, imagine all the gross stuff he does. But fuck me when he is in the room you could cut the air with a knife. I know it’s not just me, another colleague mentioned to him today that they’ve seen him more this week than they have for the last month. He is finding any reason to come in. Meeting this afternoon and 10 free chairs but he sat right next to me, I could feel the heat from his arm and just wanted to bloody climb on his lap or leave the room,

What the fuck do I do now. I can’t leave my job. He’s not going anywhere. Wait for it to burn out? Avoid at all costs. Clean clinical interactions and no eye contact etc etc

I repeat I do not go near married men. My own ex DH cheated on me and I don’t do that. But this is some weird carnal sexual attraction the like of which I haven’t felt in years

OP posts:
Ninkanink · 01/04/2021 10:46

Oh i love that. Nothing wrong with a bit of lust/a crush as long as you don’t let it develop into anything more. I like to be in touch with my sexuality and a bit of a frisson here and there keeps the fire burning well.

CosyAcorn · 01/04/2021 10:54

What you have to remember is that affairs look very different from the other side.

You are in the stage where it would be exciting, passionate, stars collide type of thing.

But to your partners, work colleagues, and yourself in a couple of years time it would all just be another sad cliche. Nothing exciting or interesting just another pair of idiots treating their partners like crap.

Keep that second narrative in your head.

Hailtomyteeth · 01/04/2021 10:57

Fuck him.

Life is short.

I've been avoiding a married man for erm... four years now. I'll keep to the rules. But I think my sacrifice should be enough, and everyone else should go for it.

Original poster
Shesellsnotmuch · 01/04/2021 20:16

Yes I asked him about his wife and his kids in the hope it would kill some of this nonsense. Been together 15 years, happy enough, told me what they were doing for her birthday.

I went and ate lunch in a completely separate part of the building today. Watched him eat cereal this morning and hoped he would drop it down his chest and look gross. Avoided the long weekend what are you up to conversation and put my headset on.

Can confirm I still want to fuck him

OP posts:
Original poster
Shesellsnotmuch · 01/04/2021 20:19

Brief frisson when we both went to go through a door at the same time, him one way and me the other, stomach dropped through my guts, fanny gallops and locked eye contact.

Long weekend to try and kill some of this off and I’m going to shag DP for the whole weekend. For the people who asked why I hadn’t mentioned him, we are casual, do not live together, been together for a year see each other once a week maybe once every two weeks.

OP posts:
Chillychangchoo · 01/04/2021 20:23

Just shag him and bin the casual bloke off.

Problem solved.

notanothersaveusername · 01/04/2021 21:22

@Chillychangchoo

Just shag him and bin the casual bloke off.

Problem solved.

Oh great. Encourage someone to destroy someone's marriage why don't you
Icancelledthecheque · 01/04/2021 21:30

@Hailtomyteeth

Fuck him.

Life is short.

I've been avoiding a married man for erm... four years now. I'll keep to the rules. But I think my sacrifice should be enough, and everyone else should go for it.

I’ve been avoiding “my” single bloke for FIVE YEARS.

Still feel the same every time I see him.

I’m married, he isn’t, and it massively sucks.

Chillychangchoo · 01/04/2021 21:37

@notanothersaveusername

He’s married, he doesn’t have to stick his dick into anybody. He would be responsible for ruining his marriage. Not the OP.

MargosKaftan · 01/04/2021 21:49

Your colleagues mentioning he was around more than normal - is this a way of telling the new girl the office tarty bloke is targeting her?

When you've been there a bit, you might want to ask someone about office gossip / background history between colleagues.

LittleOverwhelmed · 01/04/2021 22:14

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

notanothersaveusername · 01/04/2021 22:26

[quote Chillychangchoo]@notanothersaveusername

He’s married, he doesn’t have to stick his dick into anybody. He would be responsible for ruining his marriage. Not the OP.[/quote]
It takes two. OP would know she’s wrecking some woman and her children’s lives. They would both be shits imo.

Nora1978 · 01/04/2021 22:58

Honestly just enjoy the feeling and have your fantasies, don’t try and pee on your own fire, life is dull enough!! I have a happily married ‘friend’ who had this instant attraction to her new (married) manager, it was like every nerve in her body was alive whenever he was near her. She even had to car share with him and felt like every ounce of her energy was caught up in acting casual and not looking like she fancied him and fighting off all the urges! She even lay awake at night physically aching for him. She ended up leaving the company. On her last day he held her like he never wanted to let her go and told her she was gorgeous. First time she allowed herself to see that he was feeling the same. She still thinks about him ten years later. She never would have done anything to jeopardise her marriage and is so glad she didn’t do anything as she can look back with no regrets. So I think enjoy it but don’t act on it and you’ll come out of it with your dignity and relationship intact.

Swiggless · 02/04/2021 01:24

@Tankflybosswalkjam nice to know that you smile to yourself over the married man you slept with Hmm you sound a delight.

Mollymalone123 · 02/04/2021 05:49

Just imagine you are his wife for one moment.Reading this.Remember how it felt to be cheated on.

Letsallscreamatthesistene · 02/04/2021 06:08

Just grow up and ignore it.

Chillychangchoo · 02/04/2021 06:29

@notanothersaveusername

It does not take two people to ruin his marriage it takes one person to ruin that marriage and that would be this bloke!

I’m happily married myself, have been for many years. If my husband slept with another woman it would be him that ruined our marriage, and him alone.

That’s my opinion anyway. The blame lies solely at the spouse. They are in control of their own actions.

notanothersaveusername · 02/04/2021 08:05

@Chillychangchoo. As you say, your opinion. I’m sure plenty of women would say they both have a responsibility not to betray the real innocent party in the affair. Men and women feel the same strong sexual attraction to another person, married or otherwise, it’s human nature. It’s what they both do with it that’s important.

Abfabfanjo · 02/04/2021 21:11

@Nora1978

Honestly just enjoy the feeling and have your fantasies, don’t try and pee on your own fire, life is dull enough!! I have a happily married ‘friend’ who had this instant attraction to her new (married) manager, it was like every nerve in her body was alive whenever he was near her. She even had to car share with him and felt like every ounce of her energy was caught up in acting casual and not looking like she fancied him and fighting off all the urges! She even lay awake at night physically aching for him. She ended up leaving the company. On her last day he held her like he never wanted to let her go and told her she was gorgeous. First time she allowed herself to see that he was feeling the same. She still thinks about him ten years later. She never would have done anything to jeopardise her marriage and is so glad she didn’t do anything as she can look back with no regrets. So I think enjoy it but don’t act on it and you’ll come out of it with your dignity and relationship intact.
What a load of shite.
Chillychangchoo · 02/04/2021 21:43

@notanothersaveusername

Women who shag married men aren’t innocent, but they have no responsibility to bare in marriages which are not their own.

If this bloke is willing to act on his sexual impulses with the OP, and the OP refused, he would no doubt move on to another sexual encounter. Men like that have form. It’s their fault.

If it’s not one fanny, it will be another.
You either have a faithful bloke or you do not. Simple as that really.

Quirrelsotherface · 02/04/2021 21:51

This thread and another running at the moment really highlight people's insecurities with their partners. Life isn't black and white, people fall out of love, realise they are with the wrong person, realise the relationship isn't working and just want to be on their own or they meet someone else. Sometimes life just happens and these aren't horrible, corrupt people. They are just human.

SaraCrewesDoll · 02/04/2021 22:01

@Quirrelsotherface totally right.

In which case those people should leave their current relationship before starting a new one.

ConnieCaterpillar70 · 02/04/2021 22:12

Enjoy it, it sounds fab. Everyone where I work is well into their 50s/60s and sexual attraction left the building long ago in despair..............

Just don't act on it. That's when the shit will hit the fan.

mackleless · 02/04/2021 22:20

@CommunistLegoBloc

go to bathroom after him . watch him eat it

Yeah that'd put you off someone alright Shock

Grin
ForeverInADay · 02/04/2021 22:32

I third the 'no drinking at work events!' advice Smile