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Original poster

How much ‘me time’ do you get?

87 replies

Annoy · 17/03/2021 22:08

I’m mainly thinking of organised me time, such as for hobbies/sports/interests etc. Rather than an evening watching Netflix when the kids have gone to bed.

How much time in the week do have to do your thing?

I like a variety of outdoor sports, they’re my interests, but I’m trying to gauge whether the set up DH and I have is fair but want yours 1st so there’s no bias if that’s okay?! 😀

OP posts:
wishywashywoowoo70 · 17/03/2021 22:11

None really.
I get up an hour early to do online exercise before work. That's the only me time I get

alpenguin · 17/03/2021 22:13

None. I don’t even get to poo without an audience

Original poster
Annoy · 17/03/2021 22:14

Sorry 😔

Maybe I should ask your dc ages too as that is likely going to make a difference! My dc are 7 and 11, with no additional needs

OP posts:
purpledagger · 17/03/2021 22:15

None.

Me and OH both work full time (with me commuting to Central London). Our evenings and weekends are spent transporting the children to various activities.

If we want time, we plan it around our other commitments, but neither of us any regular time.

purpledagger · 17/03/2021 22:16

.... mine are 11 and 8.

delilahbucket · 17/03/2021 22:16

An hour a week term time right now. Normally I would get 4-5 hours a week of "me" hobbies plus an evening to myself every so often or a Sunday afternoon while dp goes out with friends.

bootlebum · 17/03/2021 22:17

None really. It gets me down. But I don't want to work less or parent less so there's not a lot of give in my day.

Howmanysleepsnow · 18/03/2021 00:04

Maybe an hour every 3-5 months? Or less if it’s for something booked in advance: an hour or 2 every 3 years maybe?

Original poster
Annoy · 18/03/2021 05:47

Wow, I’m genuinely surprised by the replies! I was expecting you to have more time to yourself! Particularly as the kids get older.

Do you DH’s have any time to themselves at all?

This is where my post has originated, a discussion dh and I had about how much time we each get for ourselves. I work 5 days a week with weekends off and have 2 evenings to myself. DH works 5 days a week too but one of those days is on a Saturday, so he gets a full day off in the week, plus an evening to himself.

I commented that I thought this was unfair as I never get a full day to myself, but he thinks it’s just how life is.... but obviously he will think that!

OP posts:
Bringallthebiscuits · 18/03/2021 05:51

In the spring and summer months I often get an hour or two to myself a week to do my hobby.

Other than that, about an hour in the evenings between 9-10pm, but so tired by then I usually just read.

Kids are 1 and 4.

Bringallthebiscuits · 18/03/2021 05:52

My DH gets ad hoc time to himself and often games in the evenings, but nothing regular in the day time.

Logoplanter · 18/03/2021 06:04

I work 4 days p/w and I guess I can do what I want on my day off. Can also do what I want to at the weekends, particularly at the moment as nothing else is going on. If I wanted to go out at the weekend when the kids are around DH would have them, same for him.

My hobby that involves me leaving the house is running. I go 2-3 times midweek, often with a friend for one of those times and once with a friend at the weekend.

DH works but has a lot of free time during the day.

Kids are primary age and having read the other posts I feel lucky.

daisyoranges · 18/03/2021 06:05

Is it just because of the way his shifts go? I can see he probably can’t really help that. Why is it you don’t get much time?

Logoplanter · 18/03/2021 06:07

Have to say I agree with your DH that it's just the way it is. Not a lot he can do about having a day off midweek when the kids are at school etc. As long as he pulls his weight around the house and doesn't leave you to do all the jobs...?

Ohdoleavemealone · 18/03/2021 06:12

Pre-Covid I used to go to my hobby 7-9 every week.
When my daughter started school in September i also got Fridays to myself until lockdown.
I used those days for family admin thought

MrsSDK · 18/03/2021 06:13

I get time when I leave the house to run 3 times a week (1 hour ish) or plan a girls night every few months in normal times. DS is 4. I work FT currently WFH, having an empty house that stays tidy for a few hours when I'm the only one at home feels like a treat!

Frazzledd · 18/03/2021 06:16

@alpenguin

None. I don’t even get to poo without an audience
This! (I also get a round of applause and a 'Good job Mummy'.....)
Coffeeand · 18/03/2021 06:19

Every Saturday until about 12 I guess, plus a couple of times in the week maybe to go cycling. More in the summer.
There isn’t a time in the evening when the kids are in bed before we go so guess that’s it, unless you include the odd meal out or drinks with friends which is maybe once a month at the moment.

Mumdiva99 · 18/03/2021 06:20

Pre-covid my evenings were spend ferrying kids around. Mine are 9, 11 and 13. Between them there were activities each school night bar one - then 2 sports at the weekend and an art workshop. But I get gym time/walk etc in the day. I also do some voluntary work which was about an evening meeting each month. The rest of that during the day.

Every family is different and every couples.needs are different. I would jist make sure husband pulls his weight on day off in the week. Perfect time for housework, shopping and laundry. Then when you have kids on weekend you can do haircuts, party's, play dates, homework, walks etc

polarnopirate · 18/03/2021 06:21

Loads at the moment! DH home all the time so there is always childcare around. 2 nursery days a week so 2 days to do what I want. Very lucky!

PolarnOPirate · 18/03/2021 06:22

Also yes, no kids clubs so that helps too. Kids are 5 and 3 and the only clubs they have at the mo are swimming and skating. Expecting everyone to get busier as they get older!

Covidatemyhomework · 18/03/2021 06:28

None. Absolutely none. Although I do sometimes get up at 4am just to have some time on my own in peace and quiet.

Frazzledd · 18/03/2021 06:28

(Should've added Dds 2 & 3.....!)

I'm hoping for some time back when they're a little older, but right now on the off chance that they're asleep at the same time I have an hour or two, but tend to just sit like a zombie with a cuppa....

devildeepbluesea · 18/03/2021 06:31

Plenty. DH and I are separated, share DD8 50/50 so I get a few hours daily before work, then evenings too on days she's not with me.

Even when she is with me I persuade her to come on bike rides or outings that we both want to do. In normal times she has a few activities to go to, but I try to make sure she gets at least one clear weekend day.

It was harder when she was younger but even then I made sure what we did was fun for both of us: beach, softplay was always with friends (hers and mine), library, visiting friends, my gym used to have a drop-in for kids during holidays...

Bit the biggest thing is I only have her half the time. In all honesty I think it's the best of both worlds. ExDH only lives half a mile away and I still pop in to see her everyday.

CatFacePoodle · 18/03/2021 06:31

I made a point of having time alone from when my DS was tiny, as I am very introverted and knew I'd explode if I didn't get time alone. When I had a newborn my me time was sometimes just sitting in the car in a supermarket car park listening to music between breastfeeds, which isn't very exciting but I needed it!

DH and I try to balance it, so we don't get much time alone together, it's a bit more of a tag team, but if he has a morning to go for a long run, then I'll have the afternoon to go for a long walk. We will then have a family day out at a weekend, but sometimes within that one of us will go and have a quick coffee alone. We have 1 Ds, age 10, who talks non stop....

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