Intrusive thoughts

[Mumtotwoxo]

I have just had a baby 10 weeks ago. I was doing well apart from small panic attacks from my anxiety that I’ve suffered with for years. The other day out the blue I started having intense panic attacks where I can’t sleep and intrusive thoughts that are extremely scary and real. I feel like a bad mum. Has anyone suffered this too? Reached out to my gp and now referred to a MH nurse.

@TheLumpySofaCushion @Blurberoo I'm still the same, doctor has prescribed beta blockers as I don't respond well to diazepam so will be tryjng them today (scared as it effects the heart) just waiting for my bloods results etc to come back.
My mum is still here doing everything but I need to start taking the control back, terrified to do but it has to be done.
How are you both? X

@Blackopal hi, sorry to bother you again. I've been prescribed beta blockers for my anxiety and panic attacks. How did you find them with your own symptoms? X

It might not seem like it, but I bet you are making progress, @Mumtotwoxo .

And you've helped so many people by having the courage to start this thread. Honestly, you will have made such a difference in peoples lives.

I am mainly Mumsnetting whilst husband & eldest watch the rugby this afternoon.

Took the dog for a long, windy walk this morning.

How's your new baby and toddler getting on? Has the toddler taken to the baby well?

@TheLumpySofaCushion feeling a little lighter after taking a propranolol. Mind still in overdrive but they are going to review my fluxotine on Tuesday to possibly going to 40mg. How was your walk? Thank you for continuing to talk to me. This thread has literally saved me from my insanity.
I'm only 24 so I'm praying I look back to this being a distant memory one day.
Still struggling with the baby, mums doing all his care but I'm trying to do little parts. My 4 year old is fine she's just pottering away playing herself as usual x

@Mumtotwoxo we are all here for you. It's good to hear that the beta blockers are helping a bit and I'm sure an increase in the fluoxetine will too. Just remember that you might have 24 hours of adjusting to the new dose if they do change it. Stick with it, and you should soon start feeling better. You are doing incredibly well.

Ah, sounds good, @Mumtotwoxo. You're making progress!

Glad they are reviewing you on Tuesday. You sound like you're in good hands - and you've made that happen yourself.

Remember that. You have taken control and got help. those are not the actions of a bad person 🥰🥰🥰🥰

My walk was great, and apparently England won the rugby so the house is happy!

How's your appetite? Are you managing to eat?

@BCBG what do you mean a 24 adjustment? Thank you for your support x

@TheLumpySofaCushion I only let it overcome me for about a week before I realised something really wasn't right. Glad I reached out before it got too deep and unable to pull myself out of this dark hole. Hoping for better days every day.
I'm up in scotland a wee place called Dunoon!
I've took a break from my social media in hope that helps me heal too. X

You sound very wise, @Mumtotwoxo .

And for such a young one, as well! You've really caught it early.

I've learned a lot myself from this thread too. Some of the articles have made me understand a lot more. Thank you.

Sometimes when dosages are altered your mood can wobble for 24 hours and it's easy to think that means the new dose or med isn't working - but your brain quickly adjusts and then it's ok. I only mention it so that if you feel it you know it's just the temporary response to dosage change. You may not even notice it.

@BCBG thank you for pointing it out, I would of probably took it as a setback rather than an adjustment. X

@TheLumpySofaCushion wishing for better days faster but I know it's not a short journey.

Thank you for supporting me on this thread x

Ah, glad we can be here for you.

Hope you get some rest tonight -
I'll check back in tomorrow xx

@TheLumpySofaCushion goodnight x

Just checking in, you're doing great, making progress everyday x

@HaHaVeryBunny morning, I'm trying hard to fight each morning I wake. I just feel so guilty that I'm not able right now to tend to the baby without being in panic. So grateful for my mum being here. How's things with you? X

A question for all you lovely ladies!
Is there any books yous would recommend that would help my ongoing issue? Already have the 'overcoming unwanted intrusive thoughts by sally'
Thank you 📖

I'm great, thanks for asking @Mumoftwoxo. Please don't feel guilty about thinking you're a bad mum, you are absolutely not. You're doing everything you can to get on top of your OCD and thats the most important thing you can do, to help yourself and your baby.

You are getting back to the place you were before OCD took over. And l promise you, YOU WILL get back there x

Hi mumtotwo

To answer your question I found the beta blockers gave my body a calmer general feeling. They block the adrenaline signal so your body cannot spin off with fast heart beats and shaking etc.
They are not magic but give you a slight distance from the thoughts which helped me to regain a little calmness.

I think you only started taking them yesterday, took about a week for full benefit , but slightly better each day.
When time are you taking yours? I would recommend taking them first thing in the morning as they release throughout day.

@HaHaVeryBunny that's great! I'm fighting every day to try regain my mother duties with him but I'm struggling so badly. I'm hoping to get there x

@Blackopal I'm on propranolol 3 times a day (10mg)
Is there a way it would interfere with my fluxotine as I take that in the morning? X

Yes. Please do talk to the MH nurse about this, it’s more common than you think. Your baby is ten weeks old and very young. You aren’t a bad mum, you’re just adjusting. Xxx

@MirandaWestsNewBFF thank you, I'm receiving as much help as I can get via the nhs right now x

Morning @Mumtotwoxo .

How did you sleep?

Your mum sounds really great - how is she doing?

@TheLumpySofaCushion I slept well. Tonight I'm going to try sleep without a Zopiclone or possibly just half to see how I do before I come off them completely then I'll try doing my usual routine with little one again.
She's doing ok just very tired. How are you today? X