What's the best advice you have ever received?

[NoEffingWay]

Mine was from someone who when they found out I had left my ex-h who said that there would be many who would judge me, but that they weren't living my life, and that being in a relationship which made me unhappy and depressed was not worth staying for.
Until that point, all I had heard from people was that I should think about trying harder to stay, and to think about what material goods I would lose (house and car).
Listening to them gave me the strength I needed to remember what was important, and that my feelings were worth more than bricks and mortar.

When in doubt- don’t.

there is a job for a sporting club due late this week that I have been avoiding, and now there is a tropical cyclone off my coast and the event will be cancelled!

@MangoSeason, best tragicomic thing I've read this year. Are you in FNQ? Good luck and stay safe.

@groovergirl

there is a job for a sporting club due late this week that I have been avoiding, and now there is a tropical cyclone off my coast and the event will be cancelled!

@MangoSeason, best tragicomic thing I've read this year. Are you in FNQ? Good luck and stay safe.

Sure am! Thanks. Schools are shut tomorrow. Kids are thrilled.

On getting a washing up job in a restaurant whilst still at school, DM told me to to remember that saucepans have an outside. It’s stayed with me 😂

@notangelinajolie

My dad saying that things always work out right in the end. And fast forward a year - whatever problem is worrying you now will be long gone.

I wish this was true. Best part of my life for me. Although there is an end date for everything, even if it's decades!

To thine own self be true

The happiest people I know are the ones who know who they are and don't live there life to impress others

Also Good enough is good enough. Asking the lines of Pp's If a job's worth doing it's worth doing badly (love that!)

And when I was to'ing and fro'ing about whether to finish a bad relationship "you're wasting his precious time and your precious time"

It doesn't matter if you are slow at learning to get good at something you want to do.

A friend said that to me when I was twenty. It was an absolute revelation. I am dyspraxic and desperately wanted to dance but was about ten times slower than anyone else at picking up the steps. I was about to give up but went back after she said that and ended up being picked for a dance show. I've applied it to pretty much every thing else in life. I am a phenomenally slow learner generally in life, at everything, but get there in the end, and that's fine.

@flappityflippers1

“Other people’s opinions of you are none of your business” - my therapist told me this and it’s been a game changer.

“You only get out of life what you put into it” - my old headteacher used to say this at the end of assembly every morning, I still think of it often.

I remember the first time I read the quote 'other people's opinions of you are none of your business' thinking it was insane. It took me ages to work out that it was not only true but incredibly liberating.

[quote WishingHopingThinkingPraying]@laila747 I think Ive always naturally done that but your quote says it very clearly. I've always struggled to explain that to people. When my ex was abusive it never made me reflect on myself, only him. When someone is catty or mean I always tell the kids that it's not about them it's about the person themselves and their insecurities so don't let it get to you.

Mine is following a mental health crisis last year where I was very ill with clinical anxiety. 'Be careful what you focus on because what you focus on grows'. That helped me say no to giving any time or energy to my thoughts and instead go to my kids and give them that time and energy instead. It was a good part of what helped me heal I think.[/quote]
@WishingHopingThinkingPraying

I know a similar one: You get good at what you focus on.

And that includes the bad stuff, like thinking negative thoughts – it gets easier with practise, so focus the attention elsewhere on something more productive.

@Curlyshabtree

On getting a washing up job in a restaurant whilst still at school, DM told me to to remember that saucepans have an outside. It’s stayed with me 😂

😂

When my son was diagnosed with a disability that

"A diagnosis isn't a prognosis"

And they were right. So far he hasn't deteriorated as much as he could have.

@JamieFrasersBigSwingingKilt

There's no such word as 'can't'.

That can't be right - we've both used it now!

when it comes to friends & families lives unless specifically asked- keep your mouth shut & your arms open ...this has served me very well

@Woodlandbelle

Watch out for people who talk badly of others and gossip. They are doing it about you too.

So so true! Once a gossip always a gossip.

if someone comes to tell you that another person was talking about you to them ask yourself why that person was so comfortable talking about you to them in the first place ??

The perfect is the enemy of the good.

From an old boss of mine who always favoured a "good something" over a "perfect nothing". So true.

My df when I was a teen always said don’t cut off your nose to spite your face.

When asked personal questions the best reply is
Why do you want to know?
It puts nosy people on the back foot.

'We're all going the same way.'

Simple. Profound. Essential.

@Woebegonad

'We're all going the same way.'

As long as it's not to the dogs...

To never be the most drunk person at the party

To marry someone who is kind

To not make an important decision when your very happy, mad or sad.

It feels difficult because it is difficult

@nameisnotimportant

To never be the most drunk person at the party

To marry someone who is kind

To not make an important decision when your very happy, mad or sad.

It feels difficult because it is difficult

You've had good advice.

When someone says to you 'Trust me', they are lying to you.

Better a dinner of herbs where love is, than a feast with all, but no love therein.

Being alone, and being lonely, are very different things.

Marry someone who makes you fall in love with them every day.

I was very worried about getting into a new relationship after my marriage ended. My mum has always (with great love, mind) told me I jump headfirst into things and advised caution and she was warning me off dating. I spoke to my therapist about it and she said that she had been impressed with the strength and resilience with which I had dealt with my break up and that if the way I approached life was to jump in headfirst then to carry on doing that knowing I had the strength to deal with the consequences if it didn't work out.

Thanks to her I had the confidence to meet my lovely DP who has made every day bearable over this last year and who, even if it ends tomorrow, has given me so much that it would totally have been worth it. Though obviously I hope it doesn't.

So not a pithy one liner, but I so needed to hear that right then.

Very early on in my career I got the advice: "when faced with a choice of proving you are right or being happy, choose to be happy".
More recently: "ignore toxic positivity".

The difference between try and triumph is just a little umph!