What's the strangest call you've ever had from your child's school

[listsandbudgets]

Pancake day always makes me remember this one.

You know that cold feeling when the phone goes and its school? Is my child ill, hurt, in trouble etc. etc.

A few years ago mine went on pancake day. The school receptionist said "we're sorry about this Lists but Lists-junior has been hit over the head with a frying pan"

(turned out thankfully it was only a very light, one and they'd been having a pancake race when he tripped, the boy behind him tripped and somehow in the tangle the frying pan whacked him on the head!)

Has anyone had a stranger call than that?

@prufrocks

You win, that's hilarious

Haven't had a bizarre phone call, just the usual - they've been sick, fallen over etc etc.
Did have an odd email though.
It asked parents to please stop gossiping about The Incident that had happened in the car park earlier in the week. The police had been involved and lots of people talking about it really didn't help.
Except - now lots of people know there was An Incident who had been blissfully unaware before. The gossiping ramped up.
Never did find out what actually did happen though.

Our school is brilliant. Whenever they call they always start by saying ; It is not an emergency'.

They also (bless them) call the office rather than my mobile because it gives added gravitas if i decide i need to leave work.

Other than that the oddest call i got was from the secretary who asked if i minded going by a local supermarket and picking up the house keys from the husband of another parent who had locked herself out. They knew I was on my way home and lived nearby.

(That, in a nutshell is one of the reasons why I love living in a little village)

*call me via the office

@Prufrocks you win

@Bettyboop3 that's appalling, absolutely appalling.

I'm glad I asked its cheered up a gloomy afternoon. Some of these are brilliant. i wonder how the staff keep a straight face!

I well remember the call where I was told that ds (yr1) had been hit hard on the head and seemed ok but had a lump there, and because it was a head injury I needed to know. Ok said I, if he’s fine then let him stay for the afternoon and let me know if there’s a problem. He’d also fought back and so was being kept in at break time.
They went on that they also had to let me know that dd (yr4) had been kept in for reflection following an aggressive act on another child, and she had some scratches on her face and arms.
It was me that said ‘they attacked each other, didn’t they’.
They confirmed that this was the case.
I know they are so careful about not naming names but it was hilarious, and would have been much easier to say dd walloped ds and they’re both in the shit now.

Our preschool is the best with this. The most weird one we had recently was 'oh little mimi has an itchy bum' 😂 😂 and we're like wtf.

When DD was in reception class...."hello Trapped, tiny Trapped has said she thinks she forgot to put her pants on this morning, can you come and check please?"

The school once phoned me to say my Ds (5 at the time) had just informed them he had eaten an acorn!
All the receptionist staff had been frantically googling to see if it was poisonous and didn’t know what to do!
When I picked him up I asked what had happened-turns out he just wanted to come home and that was the first thing to pop into his head!

One not mine, but a friend had a call about her ds who had been caught on CCTV doing something silly.
She talked to him very seriously and asked him at the end what he might have done differently:
"Worn a balaclava so they couldn't recognise me on the CCTV" came the response.

“It’s nothing to worry about, but DS accidentally fell into a pumpkin we were carving and needs another change of clothes” (he was 2 and had gone through 3 sets of clothes that day already).

That I had to go in and see teacher because DD had cut off another child's hair.
She had indeed. The other girl had dared DD to cut off some of her hair. So DD, like her mother would've, duly obliged. It was hardly anything, but the palaver it caused.
25 years on and me and DD still have a giggle about it.

@Prufrocks thats so funny.

My ds aged about 8 came out of school looking sad.
Me. Whats the matter?
Ds. Joe (fake name) has been showing his willy under the table to me and Tom.
Me.(trying not to snigger) thats not nice. What did you do?
Ds. I told him not to and he said he'd put it away but when I looked again it was still there.
Me. Oh. What did Tom do?
Ds. Tom tried to stab it with his pencil.

I couldn't speak at that point.
Well done Tom.

I have had a few. Ds2 is autistic and has learning difficulties... One time he stripped off to his underpants and threw his uniform on the flat roof.. I think it was the deputy head who was sent up to retrieve everything!
Another time at residential school he was for some reason on a jetty and tripped and fell into the water and had to be pulled out..!
Pre me having a mobile his first school called my sister to say he had been racing to be the first in the playground and tripped and fell. Due to his dyspraxia he didn't put his hands out and face planted the playground... 😢 😢 😢 😢 My sister collected him and his two black eyes!

School called me once to say that DS (6) didn't have any underpants on and please could I bring some in for him. Apparently he'd been getting changed for PE and pulled his trousers down before he realised. I've got no idea why it warranted a phonecall or an extra trip to school to drop some off, I told them I was too busy to come and surely no-one would know if he just pulled his trousers up again

• in disapproving tone: "your dc (just turned 4) FELL ASLEEP during story time" I was like that's nice...

• with barely concealed giggles, "we are ringing to inform you toga day is tomorrow not today" ds in vv short toga was not amused

Playgroup called to tell me they had not seen my child for 20 minutes, they had checked the whole building but he was nowhere to be seen. I arrived at the hall to find the poor Head having a full blown Asthma attack. They had found my little sod sitting under the show and tell table which was covered in a blanket. They had only found him because they heard him giggle. Other Son's school phoned to tell me he had fallen and broken his nose on the edge of a table.

@Prufrocks

“Good afternoon Ms Frocks, we need to have a chat about little Pru. We’ve had new security cameras installed in the playground and he’s taken to flashing his willy at them.”

I had to go and pick DS up (was just over an hour away in a client meeting). He had just turned three, was in preschool and had gone toilet in his pants. Apparently a pre-school couldn't deal with that sort of thing. And yes, he did have a change of clothes with him. And yes, they knew I was over an hour away.

Not me but back in the 80s my mum turned up at my infants school to be met by a stern faced headteacher and a social worker because I'd eaten some custard creams off the birdtable........single mums were seen as subhuman back then. So the the assumption was that despite being perfectly well fed and clothed I'd been neglected for not being able to resist my favourite biscuit.

It's a shame they weren't so vigilant with our neighbors kids who would regularly be whipped by both parents

This is brilliant, I'm so glad it's not just my children. Teen DD, had cut her lip totally swollen & matron asked for me to collect her and assess if she needed to go to hospital. (She didn't, but I took her home).

Asked how she'd done it, they'd been using their facemasks as catapults on the school field to see how far they could 'throw' some glue sticks. One had gone the wrong way and hit DD in the mouth. She didn't tell Matron how she'd done it...so funny!

Got a call asking me to call into school when picking up dd later that day.
Dd had grabbed a boy by the bottom whilst they were playing chase in the playground.
She was 6 and it was a quick innocent grab to catch him.
I really think the school thought dd was being sexual and I was upset and aghast.
On reflection it said more about them than my DD.

When DS1 was at nursery, they called to say they could my be sure, but suspected he had eaten a worm!

When he was in Reception, the school called to say his teacher was very alarmed because he had done a green pop, which he had shown another boy, who had told someone else, who had told the teacher. The teacher though he should be collected immediately and taken to the dr. (He had been to borthday party the day before and eaten lots of blue icing).

Our school used to send text messages saying 'your child has had first aid but they are fine'. The least useful information ever, which obviously just made me worry until I could collect them at the end of the day.

Phone call from school nurse, DS had had an accident playing chess and was unwilling to go into classes for the rest of the day. All the nurse told me was that there’d been an incident in the class room over lunch break and DS had been hit in the face. She was struggling to tell me the details and said DS would explain if I called him. ( I suspect she was struggling not to giggle as she told me).
Turns out DS had been playing chess and his opponent had thrown a piece at him and it had hit the bridge of his nose, chipping the bone and causing massive swelling. DH said he looked like a unicorn and there was no way he was going into classes with such a huge swelling.
In my mind I was imagining a giant chess set, but no just a standard wooden set.
When I eventually saw him I had to agree it was pretty disfiguring, he looked like one of the aliens in Avatar. Looked even more like one when the bruising came out.