What's the worst advice you've had from MN?

[Dinkydonkytonk]

I have personally received some good advice from this site, however with all the LTB! and other extreme reactions I want to know if anyone has had some truly awful advice from MN?
Or did you follow advice but it turned out to be the wrong decision?
Or did you really LTB but regretted it?

@BashfulClam

I complained about being given old tat by mil constantly as at least she’s still alive! All I wanted was to be lighthearted about more shite bring foisted in us that we then need to get rid of. Honestly that posted would not stop, I offered to send all shite to hefin future is she would be grateful!!

I remember that! At least you've got a MIL

@SmidgenofaPigeon

I think the worst advice I ever had was about my landlord who was a total bellend, awful man who tried to intimidate me with making up laws about tenancy that didn’t exist, such as him having every right to enter the property for any reason as long as he gave 24 hours notice, and a poster said to go round to his house and tell his wife what a horrible man she was married to, and see if he would intimidate me in front of her, but also be on the phone to the police at the sake time so they could listen 😅

That is shockingly bad advice!

I suspect the relationships board is full of bitter posters who have no relationship and therefore think that everyone must be bitter in the same way as they are.

Clean your oven with a dishwasher tablet. Useless.

@Frodont blimey, how awful.

I think the replies to mine were so OTT because one of the first responses was from a well known member and she had been sexually assaulted. She basically said I was inferring he had assaulted my DD which was an overreaction as he'd only spoken to her, that implying it was assault was dramatic. My stance was that had they not been interrupted by another child, it could have gone that way and thank god it didn't.

The rest of the commentators followed the initial response and were so cutting and made me feel about an inch high.

I do wonder if the first response had been different whether others would have piled on .

@SmidgenofaPigeon

There’s always one who, when someone sits a lighthearted comment about their DH driving them nuts by wearing the dressing gown of doom or snoring or being obsessed with the dog or whatever, says something like;

‘At least you have a DH and weren’t widowed at the age of 29, therefore giving up all your dreams of having children and being with the love of your life, think about that next time you moan about something so trivial!’

I mean, there’s a time and a place.

Exactly! Misery plopping is an art on Mumsnet.

At least you HAVE a MIL.
My MIL hated the sight of me, kicked my dog, wanted my DH and children to go and live with her, stole all my jewellery.... But now that she is gone, what i wouldn't give to hear her whiny voice again...

@TheIncredibleBookEatingManchot

The ones where people start composing texts and emails for the op to send are always really bizarre.

They've had a slight misunderstanding with another parent about lifts to Brownies and it's all:

Dear Cheeky Fucker,
I, Saint Mum, the sender of this text, heretoforthwith withdraw consent for you, the above named recipient of this text, or any of your associates to bring your child, Suzie Smith, to my place of residence, 6 Privet Drive, at the appointed hour of 6pm on Tuesdays for the purpose of transportation to the site designated for meetings of Brownies. If the aforementioned Suzie Smith is found on or near my premises at the previously specified hour social services will be contacted for immediate collection of said child.
Yours, Saint Mum.

Has anyone ever actually sent one of those texts?

At least it would have the desired effect of no one asking you for lifts anymore. You would probably also find yourself being ostracized by all the other school and Brownie parents though, as everyone woul think you were completely insane.

I love it!

Also, I used to think, all of that won't fit in a text message when I used to see suggested texts that would rival War and Peace in length. (Texts used to have limited numbers of characters, I don't know if that is still the case.)

I do wonder if the first response had been different whether others would have piled on

That happens so often on MN. It is interesting, though, that once someone is brave enough to put their head above the parapet and say that no, actually, OP was right and explain why, the thread takes a massive U-turn - apart from the people who only read the first few responses before posting and follow their line, in which case they frequently find themselves being piled on in their turn.

I've noticed this particularly at night time. I think there's a group of posters around at that time who are bored, batshit or both, and their favourite sport is tearing apart OPs. I've seen some seriously insane responses in the small hours of the morning. Come breakfast time, normal people wake up and with luck sanity prevails, but the poor OP may well have abandoned it by then wondering what the hell happened.

@HazelBite

Not so much advice, but a poster recommended a product she had used to cover her "roots" during the first lockdown posting a photo showing how pleased she was with her transformed hair, So to brighten up my dull roots I ordered some online and excitedly applied when I received it. Well I now know how Donald Trump maintains the colour and the seeming immovability of his hair. I had bright yellow completely stiff hair that made my DIL laugh so much she had a stitch, I washed it out and binned it!

I'm not laughing, oh sorry, I am!! Glad it washed out anyway!

@allthetrees

Me: mentions problem, subtly mentions partner

MN: BREAK UP WITH HIM

Well, it was the problem that he purported to make an important doctor's appointment for you, lied about it, got angry and stormed off, and refused to talk about it ...

Not me, but I have noticed a trend when anyone asks anything about dog behaviour.
OP- My dog bit a child. Help.
Replies- This is YOUR FAULT as a CRAP DOG OWNER, you haven't TRAINED him and now you'll have to have him put down and how DARE you let a child anywhere near a dog, you are not good enough to LOOK at a dog, you MONSTER.
Also if a dog's behaviour is erratic, demanding or destructive and the OP is asking if the dog might be happier if it was rehomed, it's ALWAYS the OP's fault for not having expected a dog that eats furniture, pisses on beds, howls in the wee hours and snarls at the postie.
DISCLAIMER- I have never posted about a dog!

@NuniaBeeswax

"The MN haircut. VERY ill-advised."

...are you saying that hacking at my hair with kitchen scissors and dousing it in Nice n Easy won't turn me into Vidal Sassoon??

I rarely ask for advice on MN now, unless it’s something practical or factual. I would never ask for advice on how to interact with another human.

Yes, everyone has a choice whether to take the advice, but it can make you very nervous when posters pile on because you think ‘is this how most people really think/act?’

The worst advice I have seen is a recent thread where a stepmother asked for advice about abused SC and she was told to mind her own business by plenty of posters- I can’t remember the exact details but some of the examples were really alarming. I’d hate to think any parent held that POV when it comes to child abuse.

Not me personally but I’m always shocked how generous people are with other people’s money!!

I saw a poster being told to gift her tenants her house for free simply because she inherited the house!!!- ridiculous. Also posters told that having an extension on their property was rude and thoughtless to their neighbours so they should just move instead.

I suspect those posters would do things very differently if it was THEIR money of course!

@Russellbrandshair I remember somebody posting that her alcoholic mum wanted to move in with her rent-free, and somebody said “why don’t you buy her a house of her own? I bought houses for all of my family” like that was a totally normal thing to do, and not something most people would need to win Euromillions to do.

There's lot of projection on MN

@Russellbrandshair

Not me personally but I’m always shocked how generous people are with other people’s money!!

I saw a poster being told to gift her tenants her house for free simply because she inherited the house!!!- ridiculous. Also posters told that having an extension on their property was rude and thoughtless to their neighbours so they should just move instead.

I suspect those posters would do things very differently if it was THEIR money of course!

Oh, yeah! It's hilarious. A woman posted that a tramp had broken into and was in her elderly, frail mother's garden shed. Cue people falling over themselves telling her to give him the WiFi password, take over a hot meal and bedding, invite him in for a shower, etc. Another woman rented a room in her home on AirB&B and as the home was entirely unsuitable for children, no kids was firmly stated on the listing. A woman booked the room, then told the OP she was bringing her toddler. The OP said no and cancelled the booking. The woman still showed up and demanded entry and kicked off. A neighbour called the police. But MN told her she was awful, should have invited the woman in, fixed a meal for her and the toddler, been kind.

Not so much advice - as I rarely ask for it on here, but as a public health doctor who has worked in a number of public health type areas including with women trying to lose weight, health inequalities and infectious diseases.... I tend to read any thread that involves weight loss, body image and covid like this 🤦‍♀️😱🤷🏻‍♀️😬

@SecretSpAD

Not so much advice - as I rarely ask for it on here, but as a public health doctor who has worked in a number of public health type areas including with women trying to lose weight, health inequalities and infectious diseases.... I tend to read any thread that involves weight loss, body image and covid like this 🤦‍♀️😱🤷🏻‍♀️😬

Just remember, Secret, keto and low carb are the only ways to lose weight, nothing else will work, tons of meat and dairy; if you're veggie or vegan you eat nothing but processed junk and are destined to be obese and diabetic and die shortly.

The orthorexia is strong on MN.

Oh and advice in dog house and anything to do with strip clubs. Always so polarised

Oh this. Not the strip club, but the doghouse. I posted once about my dog being a lazy git years ago, under a different name, and got so much abuse about not walking him enough, not crate training him, nit wasting money on socialisation classes and on and on. Apparently I should have rehomed my dog and never got another.

Several years on he's still w lazy git who is happy with a short stroll when it's not raining, still sleeps on our bed with us and has never been near a crate in his life...

@SecretSpAD

Oh and advice in dog house and anything to do with strip clubs. Always so polarised

Oh this. Not the strip club, but the doghouse. I posted once about my dog being a lazy git years ago, under a different name, and got so much abuse about not walking him enough, not crate training him, nit wasting money on socialisation classes and on and on. Apparently I should have rehomed my dog and never got another.

Several years on he's still w lazy git who is happy with a short stroll when it's not raining, still sleeps on our bed with us and has never been near a crate in his life...

Of course, you exist solely for the dog or you shouldn't have one.

Of course, you exist solely for the dog or you shouldn't have one.

Same with kids.

Clean your oven with a dishwasher tablet. Useless.

Oh god yes, I followed this advice too. I'm back to Oven Pride now because it did not work At All.

I think it's just the glass on the oven door that is supposed to work on. I've never tried it though.

@Aria999

Of course, you exist solely for the dog or you shouldn't have one.

Same with kids.

Nah, that advice only stands until they are two. After that, they should be washing their own clothes, cooking for the rest of the family at least one night a week, and getting a part-time job mowing lawns for elderly neighbours (or some other highly-specific and extremely niche job) if they want pocket money.