My fucking neighbours

[CindersCatsSister]

We have just finished a kitchen extension. 6 month build with all the attendant stresses. Older neighbours (late 60s) next door have for the hump because we raised the floor meaning that now they can see into our kitchen. We can’t see into their house at all. They’ve been on at us throughout the build to have the window frosted over, I’ve said no, I’m putting in plain glass and if needs be I’ll put some film over it.
Build finished 5 mins ago, I’ve been up to my ears in fucking homeschooling and working and life and all the bullshit and she sends her husband over to shout at us because there’s no film on the window and ‘I don’t want to see you in your kitchen, it’s like a shop window’. Said window is 135 x 50cm. Also, it’s facing onto their garden which is about 20 metres from the window. So it’s not in their face. I don’t necessarily think they’re wrong, if it’s pissing them off it’s pissing them off and ITS ON MY FUCKING LIST but just FUCK OFF YOU CUNTS WHY DOES IT MATTER??
Many thanks, I feel better now.

Invite the neighbours in and show them they can't see in or you can't see them.. Save arguments

If I were the neighbours I would have already put up nice trellising between my pergola and table and my driveway regardless of what the neighbours house set up was.

If I was the neighbour I'd be putting that trellising right in front of the ops window so I could try and forget that I'm unfortunate enough to live right next door to an ageist potty mouth.

THEY’RE STILL CUNTS AND IM NEVER PUTTING THEIR BINS OUT AGAIN

I wholly support this attitude!

Explain to them how eyelids work

If I wanted to be nice, I would put some glass shelves in with some pretty pots of herbs etc to obscure her view. If I didn't, I would angle the TV so she could see it flickering..

Have you thought about getting a goat for the back garden?

They are BU. You've raised the floor, not changed the entire layout of the house, they could always see into your kitchen, presumably?

They're jealous and it brings out their nasty personalities.

People on team neighbour - I am assuming this is because you’ve got your trousers in a twist about OP being ageist - have you read all of OP’s posts?

1)the neighbour threatened to take things into his own hands
2)neighbour has previously tried to punch another neighbour over a driveway issue
3)the window has always been there. The extension was into the OP’s garage

@Franklyfrost

Have you thought about getting a goat for the back garden?

I'd be a bit scared that the husband neighbour said he was going to ''take matters in to his own hands''. What does he mean?

@WhatWouldZenoDo

I'd be a bit scared that the husband neighbour said he was going to ''take matters in to his own hands''. What does he mean?

Perhaps that is a big clue as to the reason for their upset. His wife is worried that the opportunity to ogle the OP in her dressing gown of a morning will be too great a temptation for the husband. "Taking things into his own hands" is a euphemism, not a threat :)

Just tell them it's OK, you've put that special film on so you can't see out, which means you can't see them looking at you.

The film is nice.

I think they sound impatient, and the ''I'll take matters in to my own hands'' was really intimidating, I'm a single parent and I'd be terrified if a neighbour said that to me. I"d call the guards before they could get back to their own sofa if somebody said that to me.

But......... they have their own perspective and their own right to that.

My neighbours actually do that ''kill her with kindness'' to me before they have any work done! It is annoying because I know what they're doing and I feel I cannot complain even politely! But what I mean is, a bamboo in a jar and a box of biscuits go a long way to oil the neighbourly wheels.

My neighbours annoy me, and I them no doubt but that's because we're all cooped up in these tiny houses with thin walls. We all deserve bigger better houses.

1)the neighbour threatened to take things into his own hands

Yep I would too. By putting a fence up across the window. As would be his right. He said from the start he wanted the window frosted. For that he's called a cunt and a brexiteer. Classy.

2)neighbour has previously tried to punch another neighbour over a driveway issue

There's no information about this. But seeing how classy the op is, wondering if the other neighbour is similar, seeing as they get on so well.

3)the window has always been there. The extension was into the OP’s garage

Big difference between an empty garage that's rarely used and a kitchen which is used all the time.

@Ariela

Just tell them it's OK, you've put that special film on so you can't see out, which means you can't see them looking at you.

ha ha!

That's funny.
Think it, don't write it in a card to send over with a box of biscuits though

I love the film you've chosen, esp if you are going to have plants between. When you first mentioned the film, this came into my mind. It's something I want to put on a window here which would have been our old front door
www.hannahnunn.co.uk/collections/window-film

For goodness sake, neighbour disputes over minor things are not worth the stress.

You have to live with each other, isn’t it better it’s in harmony?

Glad you’re putting up the window film OP. I’d go round with some chocolates and say you’ve put it up and hope you can maintain good neighbourly relations.

As for not doing bins/parcels.....how petty. It sounds exhausting to be constantly finding ways not to be a good neighbour.

We’re living in such horrible times, isn’t it easier to just be.friends?

No neighbours here but we put film on an upstairs windows to block the heat (for that week in summer). It lets us see out perfectly but from outside it is kind of mirrored, just reflects the sky. Perhaps they'd like to look at themselves rather than you? It was quite cheap from Ebay. I'd use that, they won't know you can still see out!

I feel your pain OP I did a extension and during it my neighbours asked if we could re felt our joined garage roof. It's fine and not as important as finishing off the house, then they asked about a fence, not on side of extension, which then mysteriously all fell into our garden. Then they said the neighbours house looked scruffy and they was worried about people being attracted to our house as it looks like a dump! I need 10k to relay my drive and make it look less like a dump and then my work is finished but they keep trying to divert us to a mirade of other jobs that could, in reality wait a few years.

Its minor in my case but I get it. I want to shout at my neighbours "what do you want me to do first, I just need the money tree to pay out!" But I am very polite.

Hopefully they regret knocking the fence down now. It could have been fixed and lasted another good few months.

@CindersCatsSister

I told my friend earlier and he said ‘make sure you scramble your eggs with your tits out tomorrow morning then’

😂😂😂😂😂😂

I'd put up a blind & roll it down at night, which is cosier in the winter evenings anyway, would not put on film. ever.
I have similar to these ones, www.247blinds.co.uk/day-night-blinds?p=2
which give you options to vary the light/privacy, or just wide open !
this plus your plants is more than concilliatory

She seems a bit unhinged

Take a look in a mirror petal, you're missing a few hinges yourself.

You sound like a nightmare neighbour

Our neighbours are like this. Same issue with a side window at ours which looks onto their drive. This has been in for years and was there before we bought the house. Apparently they didn't like it, so put up an extra high fence on that bit of the drive.

We were in the middle of having new sheds built last summer (other side of the house), and during the build we moved, for one day, our bins and recycling and crap from the shed, to their side of our house, but on our side, behind the fence. Within 2 hours of us doing so they came and knocked our door complaining about it.

Similarly to other posters, they have had the boundary fence pruned and then put some of the clippings in bags on our drive?!

They are retired, and keep the house immaculate, and are clearly very fastidious. We both work full time, and have two primary aged kids, so have less time for general house titivation, but we keep outside tidy.

We are hopefully moving very soon.

I would think it is good that he is taking it in his own hands. That might mean he would actually do something to solve his own problem rather than expecting you to change your property to suit them. He can frost his own windows/put up curtains/whatever.

I certainly wouldn't go round and give anyone someone who had been unpleasant to me chocolates. That really is taking people-pleasing to excess.