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Wardrobes DH ICU

999 replies

Wardrobes123 · 19/01/2021 20:30

Just thought I’d create a new thread. To help us to keep track of what’s happened.

My DH was ventilated last week. We’ve had two calls to see him due to him being very close to death. He isn’t stable but he is still alive at the moment. All we can do is wait.

I’m not going to lie, I’m not coping at all. My mum has moved in to help me cope with daily life. We’ve spoken with the children and they know how serious it is. They are also struggling now with the youngest stepping back from schooling when she needs to.

I can’t think ahead. Just usually about the hour or two that we’re living in. It’s very surreal. And incredibly difficult. Doctors are very realistic about prognosis and survival, which is really hard to hear.

I am incredibly grateful for all the support we’ve had as a family. MN is a remarkable place at times.

@groovinpeanut - Flowers my heart goes out to you and your family and I’m so sorry for the loss of your DH, message me anytime X

@intheshadowofthemushroomcloud - Flowers for all your support and messages.

I have had several messages from other mnetters who don’t have their own threads but who are also experiencing this living hell Flowers it’s a horrible journey and we don’t know how it will end but all we can do is hope/pray for a better outcome.

I haven’t always had the energy to post, too fearful of jinxing things and generally the last few days have been very raw and intense. But I’ve read every message and I’m so grateful of the support.

OP posts:
ThumbWitchesAbroad · 25/01/2021 01:04

I second white noise or calming sounds for help with sleep, Wardrobes
My DH uses them to go to sleep sometimes - they're very useful. (I don't sleep at the same times as him so not relevant to me).

Hope you're going ok. Thanks

Bunbunbunny · 25/01/2021 11:16

I find the headspace app helps when I'm struggling to sleep, been listening to the sounds of a supermarket of all things!

ChasingRainbows19 · 25/01/2021 11:41

I had an anxiety episode due to working through the pandemic and other things that had occurred.. I had bad insomnia and was really not right with physical symptoms too

I didn’t want to go medication as i felt like it was temporary. I got some kalms night tablets. They really sorted my sleep out after previously not doing anything. It didn’t help me fall asleep but when I did sleep I was more settled and slept longer. May be worth a try. They are herbal ( valerian root) which can help with anxiety too. May be worth a try along with some of the other suggestions like headspace.

Sending good thoughts for you all

SaltyTootsieToes · 25/01/2021 12:48

Also an idea to help you off to sleep but not a sleeping pill is melatonin. You may wish to speak to your GP over the phone. It’s available in prescription. You take it about an hour before going to sleep. This combined with some gentle back ground noise, maybe some focus on breathing, helps greatly to fall asleep.

Think of you and your family. 💐

YoniAndGuy · 25/01/2021 13:01

Thinking of you OP, and your DH.

No words for what you must be going through right now. I am hoping very hard for a good outcome for you all.

1WayOrAnother2 · 25/01/2021 13:16

Thinking of you all Flowers

TeenagePITA · 25/01/2021 13:51

FlowersBrewCake

StCharlotte · 25/01/2021 15:29

I second the World Service for soothing/soporific radio overnight.

Flowers
movingonup20 · 25/01/2021 15:51

Thinking of you. At night I highly recommend any audio book voiced by Stephen Fry, his voice is really good to induce sleep I find, or there's thousands of In Our Time on bbc Sounds, they are often pretty boring and send me to sleep (I have had bad insomnia for years) and particularly help racing mind

LIZS · 25/01/2021 15:52

Also thinking back, one thing I found very helpful was Caller Display (ironically only set up by dh a few weeks prior) so that we could call screen or at least mentally prepare for the call before picking up. Can relate to fear of sleeping in case of an overnight call. I'd have to get really tired before nodding off then wake suddenly during the night and not get back to sleep again. Can you get up, walk around, have a warm drink then try to resettle. If your dm is around can she keep the kids busy and allow you a lie in or soak in the bath.

Wardrobes123 · 26/01/2021 16:39

Small update - a rocky couple of days where there was a potential infection. However, DH has remained stable while sedated and ventilated and his oxygen requirements have reduced slightly. He's now in the medium oxygen bracket (50-60%) and is able to oxygenate on this.

His blood pressure has still been a bit haywire, and shoots up and down whenever he is moved. His kidney has also packed in and he is now having regular filtration (like dialysis but gentler I'm told).

It's going to be a long road, I know this, but I'm overjoyed at the progress. The hospital keep giving me worst case scenarios, but I understand why. I know he's still fighting, and he's doing tremendously well considering.

I'm so grateful for all the suggestions. I'm giving night time podcasts a go too, but I've got the youngest DC taking up a space where DH used to sleep. She's not had a good week, so it's given her some comfort. She does like to steal the duvet though.

We are muddling through. Like a lot of families in this situation.

My mum is still here (hi mum if you're reading). Still helping us get through the day and helping with the kids when I'm working and keeping us in an endless supply of food and cups of tea.

Thank you to everyone who has left messages of support. I read every single one. I'm so sorry for all of you who have lost people to this bastard virus. It is horrendously unfair.

OP posts:
YoniAndGuy · 26/01/2021 16:48

Oh wonderful update. I hope the improvement continues!

Thinking of you. Flowers

MaggieFS · 26/01/2021 16:53

So pleased to read this Thanks

LostArcher · 26/01/2021 17:04

So pleased to read this

Plussizejumpsuit · 26/01/2021 17:07

I've just seen this thread. I followed the old one. He sounds like he's hanging in there. Sending good thoughts.

IthinkIm · 26/01/2021 17:08

Keep it up Mr Wardrobes, you've got an army of us on here willing you and your brilliant wife on.

Scottishskifun · 26/01/2021 17:08

Hopefully Mr Wardrobe will continue improving fingers crossed he does. Your managing amazingly even if it doesn't feel like it Flowers

LIZS · 26/01/2021 17:09

Good to hear there are small signs of progress, hoping it will continue and he rallies soon. Take care of yourself and the dc, and well done for your dm stepping in.

SunshineCake · 26/01/2021 17:11

That sounds so positive and is lovely and a relief to read. Thank you for letting us know.

saraclara · 26/01/2021 17:12

So encouraging to hear of sins of progress.

And Hi to MumOfWardrobe! You're doing a sterling job.

saraclara · 26/01/2021 17:13

sins of progress? I doubt he's up to any sinning at this point!

Signs of progress of course.

Capetownmothercity · 26/01/2021 17:13

Keep fighting Mr Wardrobes!

cushionpad · 26/01/2021 17:16

I have been following your story and think of you everyday, so pleased to read your update can't imagine what all of you are going through each day , but this news is good and going to get better and better take care 💐💐

CormoranStrike · 26/01/2021 17:19

Well done Mr Wardrobe, Mrs Wardrobe, the little Wardrobes (drawers?) and to your mum - this is such welcome news after a tough week.

Much strength and love to you all.

Bluebunny123 · 26/01/2021 17:20

Glad to have found this thread I've been thinking of you all Thanks Wonderful news that he is still here and fighting.

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