F'ing turkey wasn't cooked

[DearTeddyRobinson]

And the sausage stuffing is still safely in the fridge as I forgot it so I'm drinking wine and not tidying up
Kids are happy to have had spuds and gravy, DH is happy to have dinner cooked for him, I'm just cross with myself. I'm usually a pretty competent cook.
Rant over
Hope everyone else had a good day. 2020 has been utterly shite

My housemate (who lives here separately and so was cooking Xmas dinner just for himself) declared his turkey crown "wasn't done properly" so scraped the whole thing along with a tray of beautifully cooked roasties into the kitchen bin. Me and everyone else here that couldn't afford to make dinner were all watching like a-a-a-a-a-h dribbling

I did well! My duck, pigs in blankets, spuds are cooked and eaten.

I forgot the Brussel sprouts!! Of all the things to forget I'm fine with this 😂

Mine came out the best one yet. Have had some disasters in the past but this year, prepped as much as possible last night. Then today, when the turkey was in the oven, I just made all the veg, pigs and roasties randomly and put them in my new heated food warmer!!. So stress free. Wish I had got one years ago. Washed up as I went along. Then served piping hot And delicious dinner....Smug, moi? 🤣🤣🤣

@topcat2014

Just realised my pigs on blankets are still in the freezer. We ate 6 hours ago :)

We realised this right at the end of our meal - no idea how we managed this as they’re nearly everyone’s favourite part!

My Dad cooked and burnt the parsnips, I dint like them so not a problem, plus he makes the best gravy in the whole world - seriously

Parsnips are very easy to burn.

But setting gravy on fire?

Cooked it all by 10am and microwaved it when we were ready to sit down. Mumsnet will clutch their handbags in shock but I want my kids to have good memories of me playing with them and interacting with the family, not locked in the kitchen being a sweaty angry mess!!

Mine are teens now but when they were young it was precisely before 10am when they wanted our attention. Once we'd given any help setting games etc up/teaching them how to play a box game they were happy to get on with it while we then prepared the lunch. Do your kids get up extra early or something?

My poor sister opened her Turkey today to find it was off despite the date being the 29th!
In 2006 (when my eldest DS was the only child in the family) DH and I had a couple of glasses of champers while cooking dinner and completely forgot to make roast potato's! We were hosting my parents and sister too.
I also remember my Grandma setting fire to the turkey once as well. Smoke billowing out of the oven - the only time I ever heard her swear.
Nightmare at the time but these things do provide years of entertainment at future Christmas's reflecting on these past mishaps!

I managed everything perfectly for once and I suspect this is due to the lack of guests

Same here. I usually get distracted and ddrawn into conversation or opening/giving out presents and get my timings all wrong.

I just don't get how people manage to have starters before a Christmas dinner. I probably make it harder by doing a thousand side dishes but even with just the main bits it's enough to have the meat and roasties all ready at the same time let alone a starter too.

I managed everything perfectly for once and I suspect this is due to the lack of guests

Oh my god I totally agree with this. I wasn't frantic at all this year. I think it was partly the fact that it's easier to get roasties just right with 4 rather than 10 people and the fact I didn't have people hanging around in the kitchen drinking wine, getting in the way and offering to 'help'.

Our turkey was fine, but our sprouts weren't great. Tried a new recipe and it wasn't nice. I know some people hate them, but I genuinely was looking forward to my sprouts 😂.

At least they aren't expensive. We can have them another day, just not the way we did them today.

I spent ages making my own gravy for the first time ever and, in a moment of rushed stupidity when serving it, forgot to put the bowl under it as I strained it and it all went down the plug hole 😩 totally gutted as I was so proud of it, spent ages getting it right. Fortunately I had Bisto in the cupboard to whip out but the thought of that gravy running down the sink is still breaking my heart a little!

The beef was dry,the yorkies were meh and the cauliflower was m&s but shit

I cooked my yesterday and heated the amount we needed and kept it in the slow cooker with some watered down gravy to keep it moist.

Anyway I do the raymond blanc recipe on the BBC good food website. 5 kilo turkey cooks in an hour and a half, it does need to rest for at least half an hour and a meat thermometer is useful.

Even if you cook and eat on the day its handy as you have the oven free for the roasties and trimmings while it's resting.

I did a click and collect grocery order and the substituted the lard I normally buy to do the roasties, I mix the lard with a bit of sunflower oil to get a good temperature. Anyway, they gave me a jar of ghee. Best substitute ever and my roasties were fantastic. King Edwards par boiled for 8 minutes, into very hot ghee and took about 40 minutes with a couple of bastings/turns.

I’ve fucked up enough cooking over the years to advise you all of this:

Cook the turkey, be sure it’s cooked and then let it rest out of the oven for 30 mins with a tea towel or foil on it. During those 30 mins, you can fanny around with the majority of everything else. As a bonus you free up loads of oven space as well.

I'm back! She cooks the gravy on the hob in the roasting tin and left it on the heat while we were all tucking in to our dinner and it reduced down to nothing and the remnants set on fire. No alcohol involved or any secret combustible ingredients. I'm hoping next year she ups her game and incinerates the sprouts!

We have a disaster every year. This year the double cupboard fell off the kitchen wall. Of course it was the cupboard that contained all the flour, sugar, baking soda etc

Made quite the fucking mess!

Ours was dry. Totally over cooked. I don't like turkey anyway so this was bad.

Cunting turkeys - it was ever thus.

@Mangerfield

I've seen about 5 people say they forgot about the pigs in blankets today! To me they are the whole point of Christmas!

Absolutely this. Presents, ah fuck it. No pigs in blankets = utterly destroyed

@CurlyhairedAssassin

Cooked it all by 10am and microwaved it when we were ready to sit down. Mumsnet will clutch their handbags in shock but I want my kids to have good memories of me playing with them and interacting with the family, not locked in the kitchen being a sweaty angry mess!!

Mine are teens now but when they were young it was precisely before 10am when they wanted our attention. Once we'd given any help setting games etc up/teaching them how to play a box game they were happy to get on with it while we then prepared the lunch. Do your kids get up extra early or something?

18 month old is up before the sun but he doesn't have any concept of Santa and presents yet so I stuck him in front of Cbeebies while I peeled veg. 8 year old has never been good at mornings, incredibly difficult to wake her up even when she's really excited for something so she didn't surface for ages.....so lucky I know!!

Houses in this part of Norfolk have had power cuts on and off all day, they really have got something to be miserable about!

Think ours was the best Xmas lunch we'd ever done. Prepped all veg, stuffing, etc yesterday. Cooked turkey this morning then when it was resting everything else goes in the oven. Always use disposable trays too so less washing up.