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Life crisis - about to complete on a flat. Should I pull out?

110 replies

waytheleaveswork · 15/12/2020 20:41

I lived and worked in the city centre for 8 years until I left my ex H. Moved back in with my parents a 45 minute commute away from work.

Have saved up for a year to buy my own flat in the same town as my parents as can't afford a place in the city.

About to sign contracts but having a major freak out. Suddenly realised I want a bit more fun city living (am 32) before I settle down.

Am sociable but is it total insanity to rent in a house share instead of buying my own flat?

Feeling so lost. WWYD? Have worked so hard for this freedom and don't want to mess it up.

OP posts:
waytheleaveswork · 15/12/2020 20:42

And yes I know I should have realised this sooner, but it's taken 7 months for the flat to go through and life has changed massively these past couple of months

OP posts:
RagamuffinCat · 15/12/2020 20:44

I would definitely go for the security of buying your own flat.

Gohackyourself · 15/12/2020 20:45

Carry on with it OP , don’t pull out.
You can always travel into a city for the bright lights and city life.It’s not always easy to escape it when you live in it!

justaweeone · 15/12/2020 20:45

you could purchase, then rent it out for a year or so?

Nowisthemonthofmaying · 15/12/2020 20:46

Buy the flat! If you hate living there you can always rent it out and move back to a house share in the city.

Primulachristmas · 15/12/2020 20:48

Carry on with the purchase. It's a wobble

waytheleaveswork · 15/12/2020 20:53

Fairly unanimous there.

But something is niggling to throw caution to the wind and I really worry that 45 mins each way is too long a commute.

OP posts:
Jimdandy · 15/12/2020 22:05

Buy the flat and rent it out, rent somewhere in city.

Or live in flat and stay in Travelodge or Premier Inn on big nights out

KitKat1985 · 15/12/2020 22:07

I'd buy the flat. You can always stay in a B&B if you fancy a night out in the city.

charlieclown · 15/12/2020 22:10

What is the city and how good is it?
I think pull out. You only live once.
Can you get somewhere in the city?

GoneScone · 15/12/2020 22:10

I say pull out and rent in the city. I say this as someone who always chose the financially secure option and I have regrets.

Northernsoullover · 15/12/2020 22:12

@GoneScone

I say pull out and rent in the city. I say this as someone who always chose the financially secure option and I have regrets.
Whereas I went with the 'free spirit' approach to life and I don't think I will ever be secure. I regret it hugely. Buy the flat.
CamdenLurker · 15/12/2020 22:14

@waytheleaveswork

Fairly unanimous there.

But something is niggling to throw caution to the wind and I really worry that 45 mins each way is too long a commute.

My commute is 90 mins each way on a good day(London Underground) it's not too bad, I read tons of books and occasionally fall into a bit of a Netflix habit.

I'd definitely go for the flat purchase over renting.

DuzzyFuck · 15/12/2020 22:15

Buy the flat! I was 36 when I bought mine and so wish I'd had the chance 5 years earlier. You might find (as I did) that having your own home changes your mind a little about being out as often anyway; my flat is my little retreat and there's nowhere I'd rather be and nothing I'd rather spend money on!

shivermetimbers77 · 15/12/2020 22:17

Buy while there is a stamp duty holiday! You can always rent or sell it later

KylieKangaroo · 15/12/2020 22:18

45 mins is nothing, buy the flat! You can always rent it out if you change your mind

GoneScone · 15/12/2020 22:18

I think a balance can be reached though. Presumably OP will still have the deposit in savings to enable her to buy in a few years.

StCharlotte · 15/12/2020 22:22

@waytheleaveswork

Fairly unanimous there.

But something is niggling to throw caution to the wind and I really worry that 45 mins each way is too long a commute.

I commuted an hour and a half each way for 20 years. It was fine.

Stick with the flat OP and yes, worst case, you could rent it out and rent in the city.

LightDrizzle · 15/12/2020 22:24

Interest rates are incredibly low just now. Is the flat in a desirable location with lots of rental demand? Are you confident you aren’t over paying? If the rental return exceeds your mortgage repayments by a comfortable margin then you still have choices. Check with your mortgage provider what the terms would look like if you wanted to let the flat in the future (they will be different and you must inform them)
I’d buy the flat and give yourself 6 months to trial the commute and live in the town. I’ve known a few people who have let one property to rent elsewhere. It worked for them.
Alternatively, could you afford a cheap hotel in the bigger city once a month to get a fix after work and overnight?
I’m assuming you like the flat!

inquietant · 15/12/2020 22:27

You need to lie in the quiet and stop thinking and try to feel in your gut what is the right answer.

You know the right answer inside you.

Most people will say buy it. You are asking on a site of settled older people.

You are you.

waytheleaveswork · 16/12/2020 03:49

I just don't know.

I think it's been such a rough couple of years I need a breather before committing. I want a year of no responsibilities, no mortgage etc.

But i can't afford a flat in the city. I know I'm so ungrateful but just so stuck.

OP posts:
waytheleaveswork · 16/12/2020 03:49

But maybe I'm too old now and just need to suck it up.

OP posts:
inquietant · 16/12/2020 05:19

@waytheleaveswork

But maybe I'm too old now and just need to suck it up.
There are many good reasons to do things but this is not one of them!

Good luck making the decision..

OrangeGinLemonFanta · 16/12/2020 05:24

You're still going to be responsible to yourself no matter what, and that includes paying for a roof over your head. I would have thought a more in a nice peaceful flat with stability would be far less stressful than a house share with all the tensions, and shitty landlords, and knowing you could be kicked out any time.

And let's face it, thanks to Covid big nights out are off the cards for the foreseeable.

Literallynoidea · 16/12/2020 05:59

Buy the flat. You're 32. Get the security.