Colleague and annual leave

[Florelei]

It’s getting to that time of year again. I have a colleague who I actually get on well with - we are good as a team and work well together. Our strengths compliment each other in a good way.

However, we have the same problem every year. Every year before I can get a look in they request holiday for all of the best dates. Every year I ask if we can sit down and agree a fair split of the holidays around Easter, bank holidays and Christmas and each year nothing changes. This invariably means that she’s always got more holidays left than me at the end of the year and can take at least a week off which I then have to cover. The week is nearly always taken at our busy period.

It’s happened again this year. My manager is asking me if I have objections to all these holiday requests from her for all of the best dates. I don’t want to appear unprofessional but I’m fed up of this.

Should I object and out my own counter dates in and let my manager decide?

I spoke to colleague yesterday and said i thought we’d agreed that we would talk about the best dates and perhaps take a week off each at Easter. She told me she didn’t think she needed to discuss this with me because ‘it’s standard stuff’.

She also said that she never knows when I am off as I don’t tell her - which is not true - it just goes in one ear and out of the other.

I’m at a loss as to how to deal with this! Please help me.

Just wondering if you both have children and from what dates you can pick your leave from? Many places promote how to maximise your annual leave and time off work by advising the best dates to take off in advance (and some people just book time off around those dates out of spite and not because they are going somewhere/doing something).
Maybe a compromise would be for you both to have alternate bank holidays off or split them in two and you both have half off each? Or failing that be quicker off the mark next year and or get it in writing that you want first choice of all AL next year.

Well done OP. If colleague challenged you on it make sure you know to say- that you are sorry but you have just as much right as her to take those times of and the fairest thing to do is let manager divide up the leave as colleague was unwilling to even discuss sorting it out between yourselves. Next year get in there with the dates you want first.

@Trousersareoverrated

Well done OP. If colleague challenged you on it make sure you know to say- that you are sorry but you have just as much right as her to take those times of and the fairest thing to do is let manager divide up the leave as colleague was unwilling to even discuss sorting it out between yourselves. Next year get in there with the dates you want first.

Absolutely don’t say that you are sorry! If she challenges you on it you should be extremely curt- that would be crossing the line into totally out of order. But she probably won’t!

Well done op. If she does come back to you and have a moan, a simple 'Our manager approached me around when I'd like to book my leave for 2021, so I've provided the dates to her/him'

That's all true with no 'sorry' and it puts the onus on your manager requesting them, rather than you approaching your manager about it.

Look just be more organised. Put your dates in first in the future.

Put the dates in you want now - regardless of if they clash.

If she challenges you don't say sorry. You've done nothing wrong so don't even utter the word. If you have to respond just say yes, manager asked me about leave for next year.

Prepare for an increase in sick days Look out for the signs in the run up to holiday periods. Guess who'll get the call to cover?

The fact that your manager is asking if you object to the days your colleague is requesting is telling you that she recognises it's unfair, but she can't do anything about it until you object. So object. Loudly! Your manager is trying to support you!

When I managed a team, we all had to put into a template our preferred holiday days, so the template could be assessed and if we didn't have enough cover in the office we could make adjustments before anything was confirmed. It also meant I got a bird's eye view of each year, and could see / stop people hogging the best days off. I enforced people taking turns to have a long break one year, work through the next, if necessary. It also meant no-one could sneak in early and book the whole year ahead.

You need to stop thinking of work colleagues as friends... You go to work, to pay bills. Yes, complain. In future, just get all your holiday dates in when April comes for the year

I hope your requests are granted.

@Lucyk1 very well put. My colleagues would never dream of the behaviour the OP described, and don't dodge busy times, but I don't look of them as friends.

You should tell you manager. I used to be a manager and we worked through Christmas but each year I would make sure who ever worked the dates everyone wants off got swapped so at least one year on and one year off. As it needs to be fair!

Your boss has clearly recognised the inequity here. Act on it.

Has she got small children? Is she trying to avoid childcare costs in the holidays?

The Manager should sort, when I had this problem with staff we would have a rota so if one had Christmas to new year one year then they couldn't the next. Its the fairest way. And whether you have children or not shouldn't make any difference.

Speak to your boss.

Just tell them what you've told us and say: I've tried to reason with her and she's just ignoring me or fobbing me off, enough is enough to be honest but as we've got a good working relationship would you mind having the conversation?

Your boss has noticed the unfairness which is great so utilise her, that's what bosses are for. I also recommend you get your dates in early from now on and by early, I mean pick next year's dates in the new year.

I put my annual leave requests in beginning of April each year and as that's when our new entitlement starts and although I'm the only person in my role so I always get what I want, I do it as a courtesy to my managers so they can plan their leave and training.

I manage a team, one person always booked off, every bank holiday, Easter etc. I told them to pick one school break and a BH, then I would revisit her requests, when others had submitted theirs. In order to give others a chance. Someone else said the people on the team who were childless shouldn't apply for holidays, in the main 6 week school break... yeah right.

She's a proper CF!

My manager is asking me if I have objections to all these holiday requests from her for all of the best dates

Your manager has noticed what is going on and has basically handed you, on a plate, a chance to make things fair.

They are a good manager.

Stop being such a wet blanket about it and grab that chance with both hands.

She is obviously not worried about your feelings so she either shares or you make her share.

Not many places still operate the “first come first serve” method of allocating holidays these days I wouldn’t have thought.
My work asks in about September which days we all might want. We submit them and the manager checks there’s enough cover and says yes/no. All very fair.

It sounds like poor management here, OP and you need to call them on it!!

The management sounds fine to me. Maybe her colleague's behaviour was being overlooked, but clearly not now.

I’m going against the grain here and I think it should be first come first served. I book my major holidays 18 months to 2 years in advance and immediately book the leave.

I’m also super organised with childcare etc and plan my mass rota of all school holidays in January planning all days family etc can’t cover so I can get my odd days booked off etc

Every job I've ever had it's first come first served. Get yourself organised and get yours booked earlier

Absolutely, talk with your manager. And do mention that you have tried to talk with the coworker to resolve this, but to no avail. Even mention that the coworker seems not to even remember your attempts to talk with her.