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Original poster

Please help - 1 day old newborn

50 replies

Clustertimeagain · 23/11/2020 22:34

I'm quite used to long term sleep deprivation as my now preschooler woke every 15-40 mins for months and didn't sleep through until recently. I breastfed DC1 too and remember the sleepless newborn days etc etc and know they are par for the course

For a completely unrelated and unfortunately timed reason the first night and then with labour the next and first night with baby on ward last night I think I've managed less than 1-2 hours broken sleep per night (/per 24 hours) for the last 3 nights and I'm in so much pain with stitches and after pains

Baby has been cluster feeding for 3.5 hours now, and it's still day 1 so just colostrum. Latch looks and feels good, Can hear swallowing, she's thrown up some a few times and seems plenty, several wet and dirty nappies since she was born last night. Have also given hand expressed colostrum

Is this normal cluster feeding or is she actually not getting enough after all? I can't put her down as she bites her hands and cries and gives feeding signals until I put her back on, this also happens if I simply cuddle her and rock her

I thought I was good with no sleep but I absolutely have to now. I don't know what to do. DH has DC1 and is doing a great job there as also a terrible sleeper

OP posts:
Original poster
Clustertimeagain · 23/11/2020 22:35

Not saying this poor baby is a terrible sleeper - it's only a day old! Just meant I am very tired and want to check at least I'm feeding right. I remember cluster feeding being later last time

OP posts:
Mumdiva99 · 23/11/2020 22:37

Can you safely co-sleep? Then she can feed while you lie down?

She sounds like she is just trying to make your milk come in.

PathOfLeastResitance · 23/11/2020 22:41

I agree. She’s just getting used to the world and needs to be near you, preferably with a boob in her mouth. Your milk will come in and she will (hopefully) chill out. Good luck and hang in there. Co sleeping is the way forward.

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KitKatastrophe · 23/11/2020 22:44

At her age it's absolutely normal. The first few days mine was cluster feeding like crazy and then my milk came in and she settled down a lot. I'm sure your baby is doing the same :) congratulations

Original poster
Clustertimeagain · 23/11/2020 22:48

Thank you. If it is normal I will crack on through just worry if she's not getting enough despite it all. Not adverse to bed sharing in principle later on and did with DC1 for a long time but I think it would just be too dangerous right now, I really am so tired

One boob feels slightly firm already but seems a bit early to start milk

OP posts:
SomethingOnce · 23/11/2020 22:50

I think the advice is not to co-sleep when you’re overtired and may sleep heavily.

Any chance your DH can take her while you grab two or three hours of deep sleep?

thisislovelyme · 23/11/2020 22:52

You could maybe ask DH to sit and watch you both for half an hour while you sleep and baby feeds?

MeringueCloud · 23/11/2020 22:53

Perfectly normal, congratulations. Smile

SomethingOnce · 23/11/2020 22:53

Sorry, wrote my post too slowly, was checking the up-to-date co-sleeping advice!

Would you be prepared to offer formula just to tide baby over so you can get some sleep?

DimidDavilby · 23/11/2020 22:56

Don't give formula Shock that's a poor idea if you want to breastfeed.

Congratulations on new baby, that sounds completely normal. Ask your husband to watch you so you can cosleep safely, even like three hours and you'll feel so much better. And check the "safe sleep 7" if you haven't already.

Hang in there the first weeks are so hard, especially with a toddler too. Flowers

Sandsnake · 23/11/2020 22:57

So you’re second night? Both of mine cluster fed all night on the second night - in fact they actually had a poster up on the maternity wants warning new mums about the second night and that it was totally normal! Doesn’t make it any easier though. If I were you I’d talk to your midwife about it now. Tell her that your body needs (needs, not wants!) sleep and if there’s anything she can do to help support that. It might be that she can guide you in how to co-sleep safely. Even if there’s nothing she can do then it’s still a good idea to tell her as they may be able to keep an extra eye on you.

I hope that you can get some sleep and very many congratulations on your new baby SmileFlowers

CuppaTandCake · 23/11/2020 23:13

Totally normal but absolutely brutal. Sounds like mature milk being brought in and 1-4am is the time when your prolactin is highest so that’s when nature tells her to go for it!

She should be weighed on day 3 which will give you an idea of what she’s getting, that combined with wees and poos it all sounds good

Congrats 🥳

Airyfairymarybeary · 23/11/2020 23:16

Completely normal. Make sure YOU are eating and drinking enough, especially chocolate!
Safe cosleeping on my side saved me a d helped me get some much needed sleep
You are doing a great job!

Randomdogbite · 23/11/2020 23:16

When I was just so tired, I asked my husband to watch them in bed with me so I could sleep while they fed, he just read a book. It just got me through that awful bit when like you labour had taken up a night then the constant feeding.

SandwichDistraction · 23/11/2020 23:17

I’m glad you posted. I am day 2 and was in exactly your situation but at home last night. She carried on with cluster feeding all through the morning as well. It’s my 2nd baby too and I have been questioning myself on whether it was normal and whether I should be letting her suck for so long. Clearly it is normal! My milk seems to have come in this afternoon/evening and she is going about 2hrs now before more feeding cues. (Still won’t be put down in her cot so DH and I are doing shifts overnight. Can’t remember how long that goes on for!!!)

Brunts12 · 23/11/2020 23:18

Yes, cluster feeding is totally normal at this stage, my DC2 who is 6 months now was exactly same and my milk came early morning on the third day. Before that he was on a boob, pretty much, constantly!
I’d suggest loads of skin to skin cuddles, try to power through tonight and tomorrow morning, maybe ask your husband to take kids for a walk, even 30 min will help.
Good luck, fingers crossed milk will arrive any moment now and your little girl will have a good sleep and so will you Flowers

SomethingOnce · 23/11/2020 23:19

Don't give formula Shock that's a poor idea if you want to breastfeed.

Minimum for a short time while OP gets some decent sleep. Under normal circs I’d agree, but sleep deprivation like she describes can be pretty awful.

B1rthis · 23/11/2020 23:19

She sounds perfect. You might want to go onto Facebook and search for la leche League zooms. There's loads and they're really good at helping especially with early stage

Eloisedublin123 · 23/11/2020 23:22

That’s a great idea to get your OH to watch (read) while you sleep - feeding baby

B1rthis · 23/11/2020 23:22

I agree, do not give Formula. You're both doing a fabulous job with your breastfeeding journey.
If tired, perhaps express and bottle feed but then you've got the exhausting planning, sterilizing, which ones are clean, which ones aren't yawn.
Keep going, if she's weeing and pooing and you can hear her swallow, you're doing perfect!

CeibaTree · 23/11/2020 23:23

@DimidDavilby

Don't give formula Shock that's a poor idea if you want to breastfeed.

Congratulations on new baby, that sounds completely normal. Ask your husband to watch you so you can cosleep safely, even like three hours and you'll feel so much better. And check the "safe sleep 7" if you haven't already.

Hang in there the first weeks are so hard, especially with a toddler too. Flowers

I don't think that's necessarily true that formula in this situation is a poor idea, my eldest had formula in his first couple of days as I had had an emergency c-section and I went onto breastfeed him for 2 years. I had a similar situation to you OP where he was constantly on my boob but still giving clear feeding signals, and a midwife suggested a little bit of formula and that really settled him as he just must have been super hungry! Congratulations on your new DD :)
helterskelter3 · 23/11/2020 23:26

I have given all of my babies 1 or 2 feeds of formula whilst waiting for my milk to come in for this reason. Went on to feed them all of them on breast milk exclusively for over a year. Give yourself a break if you need to!

trufflepiig · 23/11/2020 23:31

Congratulations! Totally normal

Itllbeaninterestingchristmas · 23/11/2020 23:31

Both mine had formula in the first few weeks (weight loss issues) as you’ve bf before one feed might just help you get some sleep. Whoever is looking after the baby and older child needs to make sure you are not disturbed though.
When dd was admitted to the children’s ward for weight loss, the midwives readmitted me to postnatal and tucked me up in bed in side room and let me sleep for 6 hours. I woke up feeling so much better and was able to care for Dd better as well.

Original poster
Clustertimeagain · 23/11/2020 23:45

Thank you. We're home now. DH is with DC1 who is confused and missing me and if he leaves her all hell will break loose all round

I felt like we were doing well and all in control but now I can't stop crying. I miss DD1 so much and I just don't know how it's all going to work

I can't get formula tonight but not adverse to odd top up. I could try a frozen colostrum syringe?

OP posts: