Most bonkers complaint/dispute you’ve had at work?

[ChooseYourLameName]

Someone rang me today to complain I’d sent them a letter in an envelope I’d licked!

I don’t have any envelopes to lick. They all have a sticky bit you expose by removing the seal.

I couldn’t quite believe it. When I said it really wasn’t licked, he said ‘‘I can smell mouthwash you know!’’ Only satisfied when I said although I really didn’t lick it, I would post any future letters with tape to avoid misunderstanding. The strangest professional call I’ve had to ever take, bloody hell.

What’s your most bonkers dispute?

I once had a colleague complain that my bap was too close to her drink in the fridge and she was vegetarian. I quickly agreed to move it to another shelf but she still didn’t seem pleased it was still close by!

Her redundancy pay was 2p less than the estimate we had given her.

I used to work in a bank and once had a customer berate me for refusing to sell her some postage stamps. What annoyed her the most was when I suggested she try the post office next door.

I worked in a restaurant in a shopping complex in my early 20s (not UK). It was a chain restaurant and alot of the food was prepackaged. We opened around 11am for lunch. A lady came in and asked for breakfast. I told her we didn't serve breakfast and she tried to persuade me to get the chefs to make her some eggs. I told her we didn't have eggs but she could go across the road to the restaurant that specialised in eggs (literally, it was called humpties and had a giant humpty dumpty on the sign) She continued to rant at me that a decent restaurant should have eggs and surely we could do something. It took a good five minutes before she left still believing I was refusing her breakfast. Bonkers.

I once dealt with a heart felt complaint that upon opening a box of cereal, the fresh fruit shown on top of it on the packaging was not in the box. The man in question wanted compensation.

Now you know why manufacturers have to put the words "serving suggestion" on packaging.

I worked for Tesco on New Year's Eve 1999. It was madness. We closed at 4pm and hurried to cash up and then leave. Phone rang about 4.15. I picked up thinking it was a colleague's husband who was giving us a lift home.
It was ia woman who asked if we had any salad left. "Sorry madam we are closed. We closed at 4pm"
Yes but have you got any salad. "
"Possibly but the shop is shut now"
"I can be there by 5pm. It is for a party tonight it's very important"
"I'm sorry the shop is shut now"
"It is New Year's Eve and it is 1999. This is a very important party I'm having"
"Yes madam and you've had 2000 years notice of it. I suggest shopping earlier for the next one"

I thought I'd get fired but our duty manager found it hilarious after the shit day we'd had

I used to work in a computer retailer in university.

A woman once kicked a pane through on a glass door because we didn’t sell lottery tickets.

Another woman actually stamped her feet because she refused to listen to why I wouldn’t be able to sell her a cartridge of white ink to accompany the cartridge of black ink she purchased.

@Dddaddy

Colleague put in a formal complaint that I put my own, bought by me, not part of the tea fund, used teabag in the bin and didn’t leave it for her to reuse.

Please tell us more! @Dddaddy

@Noidea2114

I used to work in Argos a man wrote to the Managing director that I refused to put the Ironing board in a carrier bag as he didn't want anyone to see his purchases.

My favourite so far. I really want Argos to get ironing board size carrier bags now ....!!!

thats tickled me can have a full english pleased stewardess

must remember that next time i fly

DD works in a toy shop, she had someone lady week freaking out at her because they don't have any blue gift vouchers and she wasn't giving her grandson a pink one. DD pointed out there were other colours/patterns but to no avail.
Last week was the launch of either xbox or ps5, I can't remember which. They had to have been pre ordered and would be held for 48 hours unless the customer phoned to say they were isolating. A bloke rang in on to say he had lost his job and would they hold on to it until he found a new one, but he probably wouldn't bother looking until after Christmas.

I used to work in a phone shop, and was training a new starter. Just me and him in the store, I'd given him some paper work to go through the basics.
Then a fat sweaty old bloke walks in, I ask him if he needs any help, he says yes, I said ok so how can I help?.. then he says you can't, you're a woman.i want him... So whilst withholding a punch to his knackers, I politely informed him that it was my colleagues first day and he wouldn't be able to help him.
I ended up kicking him out the store. I wish I hadn't let him see my annoyance though he definitely got a kick out if it.

I used to work in an office that had a collection to buy tea, coffee and milk for the office to share. In every single monthly meeting the self-appointed collector of the funds used to ask for it to be minuted that "not everyone" was contributing while glaring at me across the room.
I don't drink coffee, am lactose intolerant and used to bring my own tea bags in due to preference. My incompetent manager actually suggested I contribute to shut her up!

had customer who lived in the middle of nowhere getting a delivery during Beast from the East . 3rd party carrier called her to say road had been closed due to snow and unable to complete delivery. He also had to sleep in van overnight . Next day road got cleared and he attempted delivery and she refused . Cue massive complaint about not getting her delivery , wanted compensated for lost earnings as the stress prevented her from working (from home). When i called to discuss she told me that the only acceptable solution was getting her delivery on her original delivery day. Totally nuts so i cancelled and refunded her £100 wine fridge.

I am that batshit customer.
I was rather annoyed that the optician couldn't find my details on the computer, especially as I was already a bit pissed off that I had to wait 20 minutes past my appointment time before being called in.
I was in sitting in Specsavers.
My appointment was made with Boots Opticians, whose shop is three doors down....

I work in a petrol station. A woman didn’t believe the decimal point in our sign was broke and petrol hadn’t really rocketed to something like £114 per litre, because her friend told her the prices were rising. She only calmed down when another customer showed her their £10 receipt.

A parent of my sixth form student complained because I got a tiny bit of blue pen on the cover of his exercise book. It's just a standard school-issued lined one, he sent a three paragraph rant about professionalism and said "I expect mistakes like this in state schools but not private schools".

The funny thing is that the pupil did it, I mark in green!

We didn't half have a laugh in the staff room that day with the printed out email

@balloonsintrees

Formal complaint for teaching that Jesus wasn't born on Christmas Day. This was in a secondary school and the whole lesson was about the concept of religious myth and the Gospel writers using sources relevant to their target audience. Apparently the mum had spoken to the Archbishop who was going to 'come and set me right' about the issue.

Jesus was born on Christmas Day as that is what it means kind of

Christmas Day however wasn't the 25th December

but I'm just being silly because 'what the fuck does it matter?'

Working in a bank a customer complained that his computer statement was added up wrong by £1 as it didn't match with his handwritten account book.
We added it up on the machine and checked each entry off with him and he still insisted it was wrong even though it wasn't showing on the statement.
In the end he went off happy when the deputy manager told him he would alter the next statement by £1 to correct it but that he wouldn't see it on the actual statement.

The dad of a 15yo patient who punched me in the face when I asked him not to give extra paracetamol to his daughter who had just taken the max allowed dose of paracetamol stands out for me.

[quote Namechangeme87]@IWillWearThatGlitteryWoolly I read that as gynecologist initially and was sooo confused 🤣😅[/quote]
Me too! And then wondering about all those amateur gynaecologists that a professional might want to differentiate themselves from

@hadtojoin

Working in a bank a customer complained that his computer statement was added up wrong by £1 as it didn't match with his handwritten account book. We added it up on the machine and checked each entry off with him and he still insisted it was wrong even though it wasn't showing on the statement. In the end he went off happy when the deputy manager told him he would alter the next statement by £1 to correct it but that he wouldn't see it on the actual statement.

i love this.

people can be so strange.
i had a customer complain that an itme had cost him more than advertised because VAT had been added on.
he had the receipt, which detailed the VAT element, and the total, one pound; he agreed the advertised price for the item was one pound. he agreed that he had paid one pound. he said it was misleading because of the VAT. i tried to explain that it was not misleading, as he had paid the price he expected to pay. he still felt it was unfair, sharp practice.

@AlexaShutUp

Someone once complained that I had laughed at him at interview; he said that he found it humiliating and belittling, and claimed that I had already decided not to employ him before the interview had even started. Somewhat embarrassingly for him, by the time my boss received the complaint, I had already offered him the job

I did laugh in the interview because I genuinely thought he was making a joke and I was trying to be polite. What he was saying was so ridiculous that it didn't even cross my mind that he was being serious. Had I realised at the time that he wasn't being ironic, I would have never offered him the job!

@AlexaShutUp I'm going to have to ask. How did this guy get along in his new job once he'd started there? How long did he last?

Another change one - in a small shop we'd run out of 1ps so manager said to give a customer 2p change instead, but customer got in a huff because the till said they should get 1p.

I've also had customers expect to get a refund for a specific item they have bought elsewhere because we sell the same sort of thing.

I was acting for a buyer in a conveyancing matter and they marched in absolutely furious on the morning of settlement. They had done their pre-settlement inspection on the property and noticed the carpet was slightly darker where the seller’s furniture used to sit. They expected the 20 year old carpet to be replaced with new carpet.

Oh and after being burnt once, I always had to carefully explain to seller clients that they were not allowed to continue to live in the house rent-free once the buyer had handed over the money. Unless they had signed a rental agreement with the buyer, they couldn’t live there when they no longer owned it,

Ooh I forgot my fave. A buyer rang me 12 months after I acted for them to complain there was a carpet python living in their shed. He claimed that the seller must have known about it and the seller would need to pay the snake removal costs.