Would you rather have a happy life or an important one?

[DuesToTheDirt]

By an important life, I mean important to people who don't know you - a famous writer, or a scientist, or maybe someone who founds a charity?

I was watching Sylvia (Plath) last night on Amazon, and she was obviously desperately unhappy and then committed suicide; but she left a legacy of her work.

I am happy, but I am a nobody, and I was wondering whether, if I couldn't have both, I would trade happiness for achievement.

I can't decide. What about you?

The calm existence that is mine when I am worthy of myself.

Happy!

@DuesToTheDirt

I don't know, it's just that I feel too old now to achieve anything, and in an alternative universe I would like that to be different.

This really resonates with me as I have been feeling the same recently.

I have a happy family but, somehow, feel my lack of any earth shattering achievements. On balance though I prefer it this way and am conscious of and grateful for my blessings

if by important you mean someone who has found their purpose, then it can be argued that you can be important and happy; they are not mutually exclusive.

I don't really mean finding a purpose, but something bigger - I initially wanted to say famous rather than important, but that includes nonentities like celebrities, and I couldn't care less about them.

This is a very interesting article on “success addicts” who crave acclaim and importance above happiness. The analogy with drinking really struck a chord with me.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp.theatlantic.com/amp/article/614731/

It’s an interesting question. I work in a job which has an direct impact on the lives of vulnerable people. I find it satisfying when things work out well for my clients. I’ll never be important or famous but I’m not after those things. I have a good family life and my dcs are doing well. I’m happy and feel I’m contributing to society and that’s important to me

@Hopdathelf, very interesting. Those studies are shocking!

Content life but with achievement

Happiness all the way!

Happy happy happy
100% No question.

Happy

Happy. Tbh if I had to be Susan Smith , loved by all her friends and family , had to work but went to bed at night , happy with her lot and looking forward to the next day , week , year etc . Or Victoria Beckham / Megan Markle / or whoever else in public eye , I know who I'd rather be.

Happy.

I am content with modest purposes in life.
(Apart from the glitch that is 2020...)

I don't see that it has to be either/or. I know a lot of people who have happy lives and have done important work, not necessarily that would attract wide recognition, but for instance gifted and dedicated teachers who have transformed children's lives. And also a couple of very high achieving scientists who are very happy. Personally I can't imagine wanting to be high up in government, with all the stresses and in-fighting and being constantly scrutinised, but those who do it seem very determined to stay there, so presumably they get some pleasure from it. Or being a surgeon, crumbs!

It has to be either or as that’s what the op asked.

Everyone has said happy! But I'm with you OP, I sort of wish there was some sort of higher purpose or meaning to my life. "Happy" is a bit of a vacuous concept and hard to put your finger on what makes you happy without being able to grasp what fulfils you.

@WouldBeGood sorry if I misunderstood the post! Ok if a choice, I'd definitely rather be happy. But I guess we all want to feel that we've done some good in our lives. That we've made a difference, been important, to someone beyond our immediate family and friends.

@MaidofKent78 this sounds really interesting, I'm going to look it up.

I would say happy., but.....I'm never going to be important in the ways that the OP gives as examples but I am an NHS senior manager and I pride myself that I am 'important' within the world that I work within and do really meaningful things that help people. So I think that these experiences can co-exist

😃 dunno.. I’d agree I’d like to lead a good life too?

Happy. 'Suburban bliss' is about enjoying the ordinary things in life - family, home comforts, satisfaction, security. A glamorous or exciting lifestyle involves a lot more risk, expectation, disappointment, pressure, comparison.

Happy.
I do understand your question though. I have been realising that my obituary won't be "Died tragically young" "Beloved Mother" or "Writer/Inventor/Founder of" in the last few years. It gave me a jolt at first as I thought I still had time for the last two. But I've made my peace with it now.
I am loved and I love and I don't think I have caused any harm. That's pretty good going I think.

The world is full of infinite lines to follow. Steering the right path is the key. Don't think about importance or happiness as anything other than paths. They are not destinations.

happy - no question
I have no desire to change the world or be known

Happiness is the only thing worth having. It's how you achieve that. Some people achieve it by feeling worthwhile and some of those people only feel worthwhile if others recognise them as such. Surely, everybody who isn't already happy is just trying to get to happy?

Happy.
I don’t think anything is worth living without happiness.

I would definitely recommend reading more on Plath. She’s fascinating.