Why do I suddenly feel like I can't stand my husband?

[orientalknife]

We've always had a solid marriage and very much loved and been in love. Have lovely children etc

Since lockdown and being in the house together much more day to day, I am feeling frustrated and bored to be honest. He makes me angry, I find him grumpy and boring. I wonder how compatible we really are because we are quite different personalities.

And yet we had a blissful marriage right up until this year. So I know deep down it's the toll of a hard year and a lack of quality time. Even though we are actually together more it's not time away from the kids .

I know many are in the same boat and I don't like to moan. But needed a safe space to vent tonight because I feel sad

I'm going on a lot of looong walks. And send DH to the shop whenever I can think of anything. Just to get some space. Not because I specifically want rid of him or anything like that, but it's hard to be an introvert and around someone all the time.

I'm sure he's somewhat sick of me, too, since I've been in a worse-than-usual mental health state all year, and up and down like a yoyo a lot of the time. I'm also suddenly really quite randy and would happily have lots of sex, but he's gone off it totally. Definitely adds to my frustration, and doesn't help the straying thoughts - not that I'd actually cheat or anything like that.

I’m beginning to see why Nora Batty et al used to sweep their dh’s out with a broom on a morning and not let them back till teatime.

I feel like I need to give a couple of examples of things my husband has done to give me the rage only this morning:-

1. Said I was going to M&S to pick up some lunch and asked him if he wanted anything. He thinks hard for ooooh about 3 minutes while I'm stood there dangling my car keys impatiently, and then goes 'I don't know what they sell' !!!!!
2. Argued with me that Black Friday isn't 'a thing' in the UK. Well it clearly is because there are black Friday adverts all over the place at the minute! But while I'm on one with that one it's not actual black Friday for like at least 2 weeks so why are they stringing it out?!

@Radiatornoise I used to take a book and just sit in the car and read for a while and then go home and moan about the massive queue !

frumpety you are my hero 🌟

Sigh yes. I think the pandemic on top of a lot of deep seated resentment really doesn’t help. He shuffles around like a little old man and sighs like he’s really hard done by as he’s a bit tired. It’s so massively off putting and rage inducing. Not to mention he’s very critical of how people eat. Even if I’m being as quiet as possible, I’m on edge in case he complains about my eating. I also feel painfully lonely in my marriage.

Omg I could've written this post too. My husband is just here all the time. We are both wfh and he never stops eating either and leaving stuff everywhere and In order to not lamp him I have to take myself off to the supermarket for a bit of peace. I think this is probably just a normal man thing but he doesn't listen to a word I say and so when he asked me questions that I have already told him I get a it shirty and then he complains that I'm being touchy! I wish he would just go out for the day give me a break.

I could of written many many of these posts. The grumpiness, the lack of joy, avoiding childcare. He’s a pedantic sod to boot and thinks he can do things better (whilst wholly avoiding actually doing them). Fucksake.

Hmmmm, commune anyone? Maybe with some 20 year old man-servants to help out when “needed”?