What's the most difficult thing you've gone through?

[Iwonder777]

For me, a full on MH breakdown.

Felt like falling into a pit and nearly losing my life. Almost seems like a different persons experience now.

What have you survived? And can't quite believe you made it through.

Losing my husband at 34

Hugs to everyone. I've had some tough times and often wonder if I should ask for counselling. I wonder sometimes if it's all going to come to a head one day?

All throughout my teens my mum and stepdad fought physically most weekends. I remember one time my sister stood in between them and my mum and a knife. My mum would regularly leave the house saying she was going to drive her car into a wall. Police came to the house numerous times and nothing was ever done. She ended up stabbing him when I was 21 while I was home from uni for a weekend and I was upstairs. I was a witness and had to attend court but didn't have to take the stand in the end as my mum pleaded guilty. They're still married years later and my mum always says it wasn't as bad as we thought.
A week after she stabbed him my best friend died and I had to go back to uni 2 days later as I was on placement.
My dad was in and out of my life, never really bothered much. I had two sisters in the same school as me who had no idea who I was (he left my mum when she was pregnant, had two kids with someone else and married her then left her and came back to my mum, god knows why she took him back!) but I knew who they were.

I met my husband and a year later our first son was born unexpectedly 10 weeks early
Our second son was born 2.5 years later 7 weeks early, and when he was about a month old he stopped breathing and I had to revive him, I thought we were going to lose him
My oldest son has been diagnosed with autism and were really struggling with him at the moment.

Losing both parents unexpectedly in my early 20s. Only child, no other family. No partner. I felt so incredibly alone. My heart literally ached.

Nothing since - DV, heartbreaks (multiple), physical and sexual assault, going through an entire pregnancy/ birth/ first 2 years of eldest DCs life on my own (dad not in the picture in any way), none of that has been even a tiny bit as bad as dealing with the death of my parents. Their loss has cast a shadow over most of my adult life.

This is an interesting thread. I've been through some very tough times, but I feel like right at this moment I'm going through the most difficult period so far.. I have been suicidal this week. I'm in the midst of a breakdown. I'm beginning to feel like the only way is up, though. Especially since I decided not to harm myself last week when I was at my worst point

Having to watch my daughter being mercilessly bullied and nobody at her school seemed willing or able to do anything about it. In the end I sent her to a Private Independent School. Best thing I ever did.

Previously I would have said severe PND but DH going into A&E with what we thought was severe reflux and then them calling me 4 hours later to say he was in a coma in ICU on a ventilator with severe heart failure has been the absolute worst experience of my life. Thankfully he has come out of the worst of it but knowing I'll possibly/probably lose him early to it is a very hard burden to bear as he's my whole world.

My Grandma's suicide when I was 16. Both the trauma at the time, and the mental health issues which still have affect me 20 years later.

2 years in prison

My husband's suicide.

Obstetric cholestasis.

I was itching like all fuck from around 23 weeks. Didn't get a diagnosis until 32 weeks - i had to cry and beg for a test because my consultant thought it was all in my head. I itched all over 24 hours a day, i scratched holes in myself. I was getting around 3 hours broken sleep a night for months on end and i wanted to rip my own skin off.

It was like being tortured. For months on end.

When my first husband cheated on me several times and I was left a single parent at 23. I felt as though I cried for years. I’ve come up on top now so I can reassure you so it can definitely be done.

I'd already lost my DF at 54, then my DM was killed in a car accident. Her new partner was driving, drifted into oncoming traffic and also killed another woman. He survived but moved away.
I had to organise her funeral, sell the family home of fifty years and wind up her estate whilst working and looking after DC.
I take absolutely nothing for granted anymore.

@Crunchymum 💐 for you. 5 days is so very raw. I am so sorry for your loss, it’s shit losing your mum.
Took me a long time to get used to the fact that she wasn’t there. It gets easier.

Huge hugs to all posters , there are some very sad stories on here tonight. How strong you all are to come through.

Thanks, very raw but I'll be OK.

This thread shows the utter strength of humanity (as well as the pain and sadness we have to endure)

Big love to everyone on here ❤

A family member with a history of substance abuse gave birth to two babies within two years. Both of the babies didn't survive for very long.

When my DD7 climbed on to my lap early one Sunday morning and asked me if her dad was going to die, and I said Yes.

My father's suicide. I have never known pain like it and don't know how I got through that time. I still, 21 years later, feel guilt that I didn't realise how low he was.

My daughter having surgery on her bowel at 6 days old and spending 6 weeks in the Nicu then heart surgery at 7 months. My 7 week old niece passed away extremely suddenly. This all happened within a year. We were moving house at the time of the heart surgery and I was trying to send money via my banking app to the solicitor whilst sat in a hospital waiting room. 2018 was a riot!

My DD dying in utero 2 days before her due date which was Christmas Eve.
The placental abruption that killed her almost killed me and the agony of it was out of this world.
I barely cared about my two miscarriages.
My second DD is seriously physically disabled and will probably never talk properly or walk or eat or drink (she does VERY well despite these things and is the saviour of my life).
Rape.
Assaulted by my second DDs previously amazing doctor and the trauma of being interviewed by hospital, GMC and police with nothing happening to him.
My poor mother having cancer (essentially in remission now), with endocarditis, an aneurysm, needs open heart surgery and because both she and my DD are high risk I haven’t seen her all year.
My second DD having pneumonia.
My childhood home burning down.
Ok... I’ll stop now but my first DD dying was the most unbearable thing I’ve experienced

Finding my partner dead hours after passed away very unexpectedly in 2018. Did not think I would make it through.

I had a miscarriage too, however I am grateful that it happened early on, but it was still awful

Holding my Dp whilst he died

Watching my Dd (22) die and burying her 3 days before Christmas.

I recently lost my wonderful Dad. The rollercoaster of him battling the disease and then the five weeks of end of life care was more difficult then the actual loss. The grief is also difficult, but that's my pain and not his.

For everyone.

My boyfriend's suicide when I was 24.

My dad and FiL dying within a month of each other. Watching my Mum die of cancer.