DD has put forth the opinion that her bedtime is too early.

[MonkeyToesOfDoom]

She's 7 years old and has just gone up to year 3.
She said to me
"I really do think my bed time is altogether too early"
She said it in an old fashioned voice like one of the Railway Children...
She insists that 9pm would be a better bed time.
I ask MN, should anyone reply, what is her bed time?

She gets up at 8am and is no trouble in a morning at all. Her current bedtime is 8ish usually after teeth cleaning, changing PJ's, story and such it's around 8.30pm. Should i put it back to 9pm.

Omg I can't imagine either dc ever going to bed at 7pm. Even when younger 8pm was bedtime but older used to read and read or listen to story cd and younger would never sleep at 7!!

Go by the child m

Children are different. Although children always do think their bedtime is too early.

12 and 14 in bed for 9😕

Her bedtime is generous 8pm would be sleep time.
Though extra hour (maybe hour+half if good) on a Friday & Saturday night

@MonkeyToesOfDoom

It's really fascinating me this range of bed times for the different children. I'm also amazed at the whole alarm clocks and waking naturally stuff.

So I thank you all for your input.

Coincidentally, she's come home today with home work.. "write a schedule of your day"
She's sat and done it all and has now got it all down in paper... Including her "New" bed time schedule.

I give her credit for her hopefulness as I haven't agreed to this new deal as yet.. I also give her credit for her writing it out in an official manner..

Well it's official now. On a chart. And Chart is going to school. OP You've been outplayed by your 7 year old!
I think she deserves that trial of later lights out, and your 8.35pm story, as detailed in her chart..!!

@MonkeyToesOfDoom
She is just adorable... I love her to bits! She's going to go far in life.
PM Berryl MonkeyToes in 25 years, no doubt.

My sister had an 8:30pm bedtime, lights out until uni!🤣
I can still hear our mum's insistent voice, "Sweetpea's Sister...off with that light or you are going to be as mean as a hornet in the morning!!!!" Thing is she knew our mum was right so she'd grumpily turn off the light.

Where I grew up it didn't get dark in the summertime until after 9pm. I can remember looking out the window at all the other children in the neighbourhood still being allowed to play outside until after dark...sometimes they'd come over to my window to have a chat...mum probably knew that was happening, but as long as I stayed in my room she'd ignore it...I was such an obedient child otherwise because I never climbed out the window... I found out later( in my 30's) that all the other kids did it and roamed about town(honestly it never even crossed my mind)😇 I was a bit of a goody-two-shoes!

My dd is 9 and has just started year 5. She has loved her sleep since the minute she was born and will happily sleep in until 11/12 of a weekend so is an absolute nightmare to get up for school.

During lockdown she and her dad had so many late nights watching movies as they’re both film mad and he was and still is furloughed so since she’s been back at school since last Wednesday we have had to be super strict ( for us ) and her routine is tea/reading/shower and up for 8.30, lights off at 9. She gets up at 8am so having around 10.5-11 hours sleep depending when she drops off.

She has also been shattered since going back to school and doing activities.

I would compromise with 8.45pm and see how she gets on op.

I'm sad to say that she has bamboozled me with savvy speeches and diplomatic jargon and bargaining of a most professional manner.
By the time I'd realised I'd agreed to all her demands she had happily thanked me, hugged me and skipped off into the kitchen to fetch me, and her, a chocolate HobNob.
It wasn't until my second HobNob I twigged she'd managed to get her way on every point and only given the flimsy promises of doing home work and tidying her room... Which she should already be doing anyway.

I'm going to write to Boris and suggest that she go to Brussels, I'm fairly sure she could negotiate a deal better than those paid to do it.

As I meekly said,
"I'll be checking your lights off at 9 tho.."
She just smiled sweetly and said,
"Oh don't worry, it will be off, I'll make sure of that..."
So now I know who the boss round here is and where I stand. I may start wearing a grey apron and change my name to Martha.
It won't be,
"Under his eye"
it'll be,
"Under her eye..."

(I may be slightly playing that up a little... But basically she's promised to make sure her homework s always done and that her room is always tidy and that if she does start getting tired in school, which I'm allowed to ask the teacher about, I can change her bedtime back and she won't complain.. i still think she bested me there tho somehow..)

I don’t think it can be official with a chart.
Only with a diagram.

I love her approach, especially the hopeful timetable! I'd be inclined to extend her 'bedroom time' so she still has a story at 7.30pm or whenever but she's allowed to play/draw/read in her room for longer but needs to put herself to bed at X time.

I've found with my DCs that when they want a later bedtime it's often because they don't want to tell peers what time they go to bed. I can remember wanting a later bedtime for the same reason and tell mine they can make up a bedtime to tell others if they want and that I'm happy to play along if asked but they need to tell me what time they've said first! My 11-yr-old goes up at 8pm, settled by 9pm and my nearly 11-yr-old is gadget-free by 9.30pm and settles at some point between then and 10.30pm most of the time.

@Lweji

I don’t think it can be official with a chart.
Only with a diagram.

Honestly?

I wouldn't be surprised if she comes home today with a contract to be signed in triplicate and witnessed by a third, unbiased party.

I'm also dreading her calling me the negotiating table about the Jack Russell she wants....

@MonkeyToesOfDoom
I think you’ll need to sign the contract.
A jack russell? sensible girl good wee dogs, no cockapoodledoo for her, Im a staffy girl myself 😉

She's 7. Whe I was 7 I was in bed for 7pm every school night.... I'd say she's already got a higher bed time than average.... But I also think that getting up at 8am sounds abit rushed too.... Don't know how she would have time to sit down and have a proper relaxed breakfast and still have time to get ready.

Mine is 7 in a couple of weeks and goes up at 7pm, story and settle down and is asleep by 8pm for a school night. He's been asking to go to bed a little bit earlier this week though (which of course is fine) because back to school has knocked the wind out of him a bit.

Weekends and holidays it's 9pm.

This is something that kids seem to talk about and staying up later can gain “street cred” or be cool. We’ve had several discussions with our four kids about bedtimes. Ultimately, kids will differ in how much sleep they need so the recommendations are just a guide. You know your child so maybe explain that you are guided by her need for sleep and not the number on the clock and the importance of a regular bedtime (helps to keep our bodies healthy). If she starts to goes to bed at 8pm then she is possibly not asleep until closer to 9pm? I also explained that adults go to bed at different times but many times it was just a case of “that’s just what we need to do in our house.” They can’t always understand the reasons.

One thing
I've always said to my kids that there will be several types of bedtimes.

1. Parents who just don't care enough about their child's ability to cope without the right amount of sleep
2. Kids who lie about bedtimes to seem more grown up.

I said that they could happily be in group 2 if it saved them face at school but we care about their health and well-being so we have rules.

@thatplaceinjordan

One thing I've always said to my kids that there will be several types of bedtimes.

1. Parents who just don't care enough about their child's ability to cope without the right amount of sleep
2. Kids who lie about bedtimes to seem more grown up.

I said that they could happily be in group 2 if it saved them face at school but we care about their health and well-being so we have rules.

Are you saying I don't care? You seem to be implying that anyone that doesn't do as you do is wrong and doesn't care about their child, which is an idiotic and offensive view point. Now maybe you worded that post wrong, so let me be clear and carefully word my response to you here...

Just for the clearness and for clarity...

Gibbons are not monkeys.
Right?.. You got that? 😝

1. Parents who just don't care enough about their child's ability to cope without the right amount of sleep

So what if you're a child who needs 9 hours sleep and needs to get up at 8am, a parent who cared enough to cope with the right amount of sleep would have them asleep at 11pm - that's within the normal range, but you decide to tell your child that the kids have parents that don't care?

@thatplaceinjordan

One thing I've always said to my kids that there will be several types of bedtimes.

1. Parents who just don't care enough about their child's ability to cope without the right amount of sleep
2. Kids who lie about bedtimes to seem more grown up.

I said that they could happily be in group 2 if it saved them face at school but we care about their health and well-being so we have rules.

So anyone who gives their child a bedtime later than you think is acceptable doesn't care about their child?

That's a cracking ego you've got going on there.

If you’re having to wake her up at 8am her bedtime is obviously late enough. 9.30 is very late for a 7yr old.

My son is the same age and goes upstairs at 7.45 and lights out by 8.15. He never seems to fall asleep much before 9, so maybe she could go later, but perhaps start with half an hour and see how it goes. DS gets up at 6.30 every morning and never seems overly tired.

My two boys are 6 and 10 and they are both in bed by 8:45 with the lighs out. They share a room so its impossible to get the little one to settle without his big brother also in bed.
We do occasionally tell the 10yr old he can put a movie on once his brother is asleep on a Saturday night.