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Original poster

Asking for a handhold - DH in ICU

988 replies

peachgreen · 04/09/2020 10:56

DH was taken into hospital last night with breathing difficulties. It was pretty minor, the paramedics weren't even going to take him in but we insisted. He's now in an induced coma on a ventilator. He's had 2 negative Covid tests so they don't think it's that but they don't know what it is.

I'm falling apart. He's my whole life. We have a 2 year old who is a complete Daddy's girl. I need him so much. I can't even be with him now because of COVID.

OP posts:
SomethingM1ss1ng · 19/09/2020 08:51

Hope you receive some positive news today

Original poster
peachgreen · 19/09/2020 09:20

Thanks both. His blood pressure was too low last night for him to be given his HF drugs but improved this morning in time for his beta blockers. Really hoping to see his HR come down as that's concerning us all.

OP posts:
spiderlight · 19/09/2020 11:58

Hope he has a better day today

Original poster
peachgreen · 19/09/2020 17:56

HR still in the 90s most of the day but less 100s than yesterday maybe. He was definitely in better spirits though which helps a lot.

OP posts:
petalpower · 19/09/2020 18:35

That’s good that he was in better spirits. Hopefully that shows he’s feeling a bit better. How is your daughter now peachgreen? I presume she hasn’t been able to see her daddy in hospital?

Original poster
peachgreen · 19/09/2020 18:43

She was doing a lot better but unfortunately she's now constipated (despite daily laxatives) which usually causes issues. Hopefully I can keep on top of it. No she hasn't been able to go in which has been really tough for them both. But she has facetimed him every day.

OP posts:
northprincess · 19/09/2020 23:38

Ahh I really am thinking about you. Your little girls system won't be helped by her feeling things aren't quite right.

Your DH is absolutely in the best place but I do think they can also be quite scary. Hospital staff DO like to tell it how it is / focussing on the worst sometimes.

Take some time for you too!

petalpower · 20/09/2020 07:18

Thank goodness for FaceTime in situations like this. Hope you’ve been able to get a good rest last night and today is a positive day for you all.

Original poster
peachgreen · 20/09/2020 09:01

He had a bad night last night. More fluid on his lungs they think so he's off for another chest xray and back on the diuretics. They're also trying another heart medication as his HR just isn't coming down. I'm so frightened, things just don't seem to be improving.

OP posts:
ArabellaScott · 20/09/2020 09:07

Thinking of you all, peachgreen.

petalpower · 20/09/2020 09:13

Thinking of you. Hopefully they’ll find another med that brings his HR down. It’s such a balancing act with meds until they get the right ones.

Marmunia1975 · 20/09/2020 17:15

Praying for you both.

AlternativePerspective · 20/09/2020 17:19

Fingers crossed they find a more suitable medication soon.

Unfortunately different people respond diffferently to medications. I used to be on digoxin for my AF, but I never really settled on it. On Amnioderone now and have never felt better. Yet there are people for who the opposite is true... With a EF of 20% he may be on diuretics for a while or even for the rest of his life. I am and I know many others who are. It goes like that sometimes.

renallychallenged · 20/09/2020 17:53

I haven't come across this thread before, just posting to say you're doing a great job of staying strong for your husband and little girl.

As the days turn into weeks & months, do try and take some time out for yourself. Whether it's a long walk or shopping or cinema or whatever you usually do.

Are you working when your dd is at nursery? Can you take some time off if so?

My DH is chronically ill and so I can sympathise with the wanting to be informed & visit all the time, but when things turn out to be more long term than expected you can't always keep up the pace you run at in the beginning . I burned myself out with daily hospital visits, now I know to not push on through. No shame in taking a few nights off x

forgetthehousework · 20/09/2020 19:14

Praying for a better night for you both.

Original poster
peachgreen · 20/09/2020 20:08

Thank you all and thank you @renallychallenged for your valuable perspective. I definitely couldn't carry this on for much longer so I will bear your advice in mind. I'm off sick from work at the moment and I expect I will be for a while - I'm still in recovery from very severe PND so am very aware that my own mental health is fragile and I need to take the time I need and not pressure myself. Thankfully I have a very understanding employer.

Today has been better. There was fluid on his lungs but the IV diuretic sorted it before he even had the chest xray so it's all clear now. They haven't put him back on diuretics just yet as they're trying to control his BP but they will before he's released and they've left his cannula in so they can do it again if needs be. His HR did respond a little to the ivabridine so we're hopeful that will continue over the next few days. His doctor is confident that they will get his HR under control with medication.

She's advised that we should get a defib if we can afford one (we can get it on 0% finance). So it will be a comfort having that in the house.

He's still having awful breathlessness which they think can't be heart related as his chest xray is clear. The new theory is that it could be related to him being on aspirin as sometimes that causes problems for asthmatics. So they've switched him to something else from tomorrow.

It's just such a rollercoaster.

OP posts:
northprincess · 20/09/2020 20:09

I hope today has been a better day

northprincess · 20/09/2020 20:09

Sorry - cross posted

AlternativePerspective · 20/09/2020 22:59

Glad today has been better.

I would ask the doctor why they’re advising you should get a defib if they’re not considering inserting an ICD?

Original poster
peachgreen · 20/09/2020 23:12

I think because his risk of cardiac arrest is elevated but I guess not enough to justify fitting an ICD? They may still do it after his 3 month review but it won't happen immediately apparently.

OP posts:
TrickyD · 21/09/2020 01:01

Hoping you and your DH have a peaceful night and his improvement continues.

petalpower · 21/09/2020 20:54

How are things today @peachgreen?

Original poster
peachgreen · 21/09/2020 21:14

Up and down. His heart rate has definitely slowed to the mid 80s which is great, and his BP was a bit better and he was able to get his pills this morning. Not sure what'll happen tonight. He's still having the breathlessness which is really upsetting him. Just hope they can figure out what it is.

I'm starting to get really anxious about Covid Sad

OP posts:
petalpower · 21/09/2020 21:21

Are you anxious he’s got Covid or that any new restrictions will affect your ability to visit?

Original poster
peachgreen · 21/09/2020 21:23

More that he'll be very vulnerable to it when he gets home. We can shield to a certain extent but it's still a bit worry.

If I'm honest I think I'm just feeling a bit traumatised tonight by the whole thing. I keep thinking about him being in A&E and the phone call and how fucking terrified I'm going to be from now on and how our lives are changed forever. Just spiralling a bit. It will pass but it's horrible.

OP posts: