How would you feel if you’d made a friend so uncomfortable they left your house?

[PartyRingRingParty]

Just that really.

Surely it depends why, eg if I had accidentally brought up a sensitive topic that I should have known was a problem for them, Vs them taking offence at something I had every reason to assume was innocuous, for example.

Need more information.

Definitely need context

Friend had a small gathering. I arrived early (as requested) she told me she had a new job (we work together) - I said congratulations and jokingly said I’ll never see you again now (all said very light hearted and obviously not true). Cue stoney stare and silence.

I then tried to lighten the mood and said tell me more about it, she simply replied no. Said she had to go to her garage and was there ages.

Another friend of hers arrived (I’d never met her) and they provided to leave me in the living room and stand talking in the kitchen (next room) and closed the door.

I’d brought a bowl that she’d specifically asked me to bring. I then got it out and she snapped at me that she didn’t want it now.

I just felt quite hurt and very uncomfortable over an innocent throwaway comment. That if it did offend her then she could have just said.

I mean, it's a pretty weird thing to say, and I'd have assumed you were being passive aggressive, but i don't think I'd have left. Then again i am a coward, I'd have probably wanted to leave.

Are you generally quite demanding of her time/attention?

What you said was a bit odd can you apologise now?

Are you generally quite demanding of her time/attention?

what?

You automatically spend a lot of time with your colleagues. Obviously no longer working with them you will see them less.

I’ve never demanded her time or attention. Why have you reached that conclusion

@PartyRingRingParty

Are you generally quite demanding of her time/attention?

what?

You automatically spend a lot of time with your colleagues. Obviously no longer working with them you will see them less.

I’ve never demanded her time or attention. Why have you reached that conclusion

I reached that conclusion because what you said obviously really affected her, and that would explain it.

I don’t think what you said was that bad OP, unless I’m completely missing something?

When previous work colleagues have announced they are leaving I’ve made similar types of comments about being sad that I’d be seeing them less and that I was going to miss them. So far it’s been a non-issue.

What is the back story? There is obviously a huge back story here.

starts reading thread. Gets to OP’s last comment. Backs out slowly

woah

If you are reporting this accurately I would say your friend behaved very strangely. I have to imagine there is more to it. Have you confirmed that the one comment is really why she was so upset?

Okaaaaaaaay

Well, that escalated quickly!

I see nothing wrong with what you said, it was obviously in jest!

Oh I see now.

Suddenly, your friends reaction makes a lot of sense given your charming disposition.

I was coming on to say she over reacted....

Gosh OP you're very aggressive!
Also there's a big difference between saying that you will miss working with someone and making PA comments about them not having time to see you anymore? Couldn't you just say congrats and leave it at that? Have you spoken with her to understand why she reacted badly?
Also, you either have no idea how badly you come across (fucking freak comment in point at someone trying to give you advice - that you asked for!) or you don't care - so that could explain why she's reacted badly (and very likely interpreted your statement a whole different way to how you're presenting it here)

@PartyRingRingParty

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Rude

Wowzer

@PartyRingRingParty

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Well if you’re like this in real life then I think else have an answer......