If your username was a TV show/movie , what would be the plot?

[WomenHour]

Or the premise

Mine would be women issues for a hour.

A parliament of rooks go about solving crimes comitted by people pretending to be ghosts...

A 6mo supervillain returns with his pungent rear leaving destruction in its wake.

Jed Bartlet cycling into a tree

A desperately thirsty Geordie seeks the fastest route to get to Newcastle for a major sesh

A true story of how the UK stupidly elected a massive twat into power then watched as things turn to shit.

• 1* rating, wouldn't watch again. The main character was a bellend.

one apple causes mayhem in the orchard

it is all about a misremembered streetname and a windmill

Adventures in Narnia

Woman kills and eats her husband, as she objected to the expectation that she should be subservient; then skinned him and wore it as a fetching onesie, with head hanging off the back, like a hood. She then rampaged around the Two Universes for a bit, before being blown up in a supernova.

Ninja assassin triumphs over evil. There would be a lot of graceful yet impressive ninja moves & black lycra.

Nothing at all to do with a clumsy middle-aged woman forgetting to water the plants. Although that may be the Orchid Killer's cover story...

Newlyweds’ car breaks down. There’s a light shining outside a spooky mansion. They have an interesting night with Tim Curry and that bloke from the Crystal Maze.

Mine is a time travelling historian....sorry, an historian that investigates key historical events in contemporary time.

A woman with terribly bad luck but continues telling herself, its not always me.

We are a group bound by the creed that humanity is better and more noble after very nearly 2 drinks than at any other time.
We are a force for good, sworn to maintain a level of just enough smashedness to make everything feel lovely.

It would be about a butcher who sold 'special stuff' from his shop which would eventually cause a haemorrhagic epidemic, marked by chronic nosebleeds.

A lady with a dog and a spotty plane shows children lots of adventures.

Cartoon Discworld spinoff featuring awkward but rocket-propelled swamp dragon and fabulous if scary lady dragon.

With my username ZOMBIE MOVIE

Very small silver birds start appearing at the corner of your vision. What is their purpose? What do they want from us? Fear the metal birds. Fear and worship them.

A group of mutants with superhuman powers set up their HQ in Bloomsbury. The series follows both their crime-fighting adventures and their artistic, intellectual and sexual pursuits.

Seven dwarfs and their slutty housemate

25 sheets of paper take over the world and commit acts of mind-bending papery atrocity.

(No, I don’t think it’s going to be commissioned either...)

Spin off from True and the Rainbow Kingdom. Glumy hangs out in his swamp and complains about everything. Occasionally he goes to bother the Rainbow King so that someone can hear and appreciates his deep and thoughtful complaints. It would be cancelled after half a season for being too boring depressing for kids, but live on as a cult phenomenon beloved by disaffected and probably stoned students.

@VirginiaWolverine, I would watch the hell out of that, if you made Lytton Strachey an annoying, camp vampire who gets staked in episode one.