Harmonising whilst singing happy birthday

[NCParanoia]

Caveat: I know there's bigger and worse things going on in the world that I should be annoyed at, but here we are.

Does this make anyone else totally cringe? I have a family member who always harmonises when we sing happy birthday, especially the last bit. I find it so cringey.. its a bit me me me when the point of singing happy birthday is for the birthday person to be in the limelight. Also isn't it something awful we all sing just because we have to, not because we want to?

Am I alone in this? Do you harmonise when singing happy birthday? If so - why?!

(I promise I'm also a happy, fun person who likes to have a good time. I appreciate i sound like a massive birthday grinch)

That's funny.

My sister's lot are all tone deaf so it's much more like wailing cats. Isn't that what it's all about?

But is there anyone on here (ANYONE ?!?) who enjoys having Happy Birthday sung at them, harmonies or otherwise????

@Cavagirl

But is there anyone on here (ANYONE ?!?) who enjoys having Happy Birthday sung at them, harmonies or otherwise????

Me! The more harmonies the better!

Oh but I do LOVE a good harmony

Have to say, I’ve never done it during happy birthday but that’s because I consider myself the carrier of the tune keeping the whole motley crew together.

Imagine the joy if I added in my spectacular ukulele skills...

You all want me at your next birthday party, don’t you....

I'm pretty posh by most standards, I know what an alto line is and it still makes me die inside to see other people make such spectacles of themselves at a birthday party.

I think the idea that the people who dislike it must be jealous underlies a lot of the posts from people who do it. Absolutely nobody is wishing they were you when you're making a tit out of yourself by harmonising to happy birthday.

Whereas I'm not posh, but sing in choirs and I also die inside seeing people add in harmonies like this.

You're right about the jealousy claims. Nobody i wishing they were the look at me people.

This is a Michael Scott from the American Office habit...

Aside from the ridiculous comment Choral singing is very middle class, middle aged (or older) and white this is hysterical.

I've never heard HB sung with harmony but a die a million deaths at the mum at our school that does it while the kids are ploughing through Hark The Herald at Nativity.

It's the same woman that orders a Kerwusssson with her coffee in the cafe.

@Knocka

To be honest, I shamelessly sing soprano on the rare occasions I go to church.

I KNOW it's cringe to do so in an informal setting, but I've got a naturally pleasant but untrained soprano voice, and I lack confidence to do the whole 'bursting into song' thing others find easy unless I've got a congregation to sing with. So I just sing to enjoy myself in church (and get very sulky if I have a sore throat).

But nothing at all cringeworthy about that, surely, @thecatsthecats? You're just singing collectively, and enjoying it. You're not doing a solo soprano descant while cupping your hand behind your ear to fully appreciate the wonder of your Renée Fleming-esque vocal gymnastics over the rest of the congregation who are cast as backing vocalists in your personal musical drama?

Maybe find a choir where you can sing more?

Sorry, I meant that it's cringe to do so when singing happy birthday when everyone else is singing normally.

I've been pushed towards choirs but to be honest they're not massively my thing. For one, it's hard to find a non-religious one, and for two, I'm not really into group practice, and being told what to do etc, so it's always hard to find a nice fit. (I'm dyspraxic, so find fitting in with groups on physical things a bit challenging sometimes)

I've had two kinds of instrument lessons before (piano and drums), and though I enjoy getting more skilled, I'm not that invested in it. I think it pisses off instructors who'd like perfection, whereas I'd just like to bumble through exploring things I enjoy and ignoring the bits I don't!

(objectively I do have a nice voice though, as a few people have approached me about my singing in church, and I don't even go very often)

Find a choir?

They've been banned by Boris.

I've never heard HB sung with harmony but a die a million deaths at the mum at our school that does it while the kids are ploughing through Hark The Herald at Nativity
Oh no, she didn't!
- awkward

Find a choir

Oh no you won't, unlikely to find a wind band/ ensemble too.

contended sigh im so glad I made tbis thread

@wanderings

Find a choir?

They've been banned by Boris.

The choir I belong to has this week started up again, in a large garden, socially distanced. Each person is 2m away from the next. I didn't go because I'm still isolating after surgery but I'm told it went well.

I’m such a horrible singer apparently I’m impossible to harmonise with, my partner gets really annoyed whenever DD makes us sing nursery rhymes together. Why he feels the need to harmonise wheels on the bus, I don’t know!! XD

@Justmuddlingalong

My mother still sings the "you look like a monkey and live in a zoo" version and then cackles manickly at her hilarity. I'm 50 FFS. 🙄

Surely it goes, "you look like a monkey and you smell like one too?"

You're not doing a solo soprano descant while cupping your hand behind your ear to fully appreciate the wonder of your Renée Fleming-esque vocal gymnastics over the rest of the congregation who are cast as backing vocalists in your personal musical drama?

This made me genuinely lol.
OP, beware if your family member sees the thread, it might give them new ideas.
Great thread. And yes, it is showing off, in my opinion.

I sing alto in a choir, am fairly musical, can play most instruments without instruction, have a good ear and am utterly skint (think that covers all the caveats shoehorned into the thread). During happy birthday, I sing the melody at a volume appropriate to the group with no harmony and no trilling. As does everybody I know. The only exception is when we sing it at choir and the rule is that you harmonise until you can't harmonise any more, solos are encouraged, obligatory jazz hands, Mariah Carey style squawking etc. Only within the confines of the choir rehearsal room.

I love carols harmonised, part of why I joined a choir in the first place but I'm English. You save that shit for choir or quietly during a large service. I know that the big burly bloke in the church who actually steps up to the front unasked and "bom bom boms" with gusto is an automatic pariah and it's only modern sensibilities that mean we aren't allowed to stone him to death.

@EvaHoffman please don't worry about money making a birthday btw. My parents had nothing but made them special. We played games, dressed up, went out to places we liked (free, into the woods, to the beach etc, whatever the child liked) and felt thoroughly spoiled. Don't equate a mostly tongue in cheek, playful thread with a comment on your personal situation. If your children have asked you not to harmonise, you are best placed to read the room. If it's a feeble protest and they love it really, crack on. If they truly find it uncomfortable then stop and invent an interpretative dance instead. Maybe something of which Legs and Co would be proud. That'll learn em.

[quote noodlezoodle]This thread has really cheered me up. It's also great inspiration for new usernames. Should I choose "stratospheric descant", "no one appreciates me and my ukelele", or "Julian's tiramisu"?

Also OP, while you are completely right, it could always be worse: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3636707-To-hate-it-when-people-sing[/quote]
Well that's my Friday sorted ! Thanks for linking this.
OP, look what you have started

I'm in a choir (well, only online now, I miss them all), but we have a monthly birthday cake and always sing it beautifully in harmony. We have never practised or decided it, it just happens and it sounds lovley!

I know that the big burly bloke in the church who actually steps up to the front unasked and "bom bom boms" with gusto is an automatic pariah and it's only modern sensibilities that mean we aren't allowed to stone him to death.

And this made me remember that I have actually been in a group situation with no less than Bryn Terfel when 'Happy Birthday' was being sung to someone in a pub, and he just sang along with everyone else at an appropriate volume, he didn't go all Flying Dutchman or Wotan.

I love impromptu singing. Especially with harmonies, where everyone just joins in spontaneously. Unfortunately I think you only really get that in a very narrow section of English society, you have to see out the folk clubs and pubs. I miss 8n in my normal life.
I get a bit of it in church but it's not the same, and more learnt and formal.

If people want to harmonise happy birthday for me I would love it. It would be a great treat. It's the only spontaeous communal singing we get in our society (Except football matches and I'm not really a football fan). And I crave more of that.

@shirleyphallus yours has to be one of the best comments 🤣
I've now got a mental image of walking back from Tesco with my milk only to meet you flying past at a rate of knots doing a jaunty Irish jig as you head down to the crossroads.

@LoafEater

I'm in a choir (well, only online now, I miss them all), but we have a monthly birthday cake and always sing it beautifully in harmony. We have never practised or decided it, it just happens and it sounds lovley!

This & If people want to harmonise happy birthday for me I would love it are very different kettles of fish to OP's post though I think - this is organised and maybe not to everyone's taste but fair enough. It's the "surprise harmoniser" who suddenly unleashes themselves at an otherwise fairly standard singing of Happy Birthday that I think most people object to as being somewhat attention seeking and utterly cringe. OP this thread has kept me entertained all week, thank you!!