MIL never talks about proper things- just gossip and rubbish. Is this a thing?!

[Napqueen1234]

I’ve never met anyone like my MIL for chatting rubbish. I’ve met gossipers, people who talk about themselves constantly. But she almost talks about nothing. Case in point- today met for a walk in the park. My DH has just taken on a few new big jobs, DC1 about to start preschool and finishing nursery, DC2 6 months and changing every day. This week we had to isolate due to covid risk and go to A&E (she vaguely knew about these things). She asked nothing about any of them- instead talked for 40 minutes about a random friends caravan (no idea who they are) and her partners daughter. She loves seeing the DC but never texts to ask about them etc (I end up sending updates and pics as I feel we ought to keep her in the loop). It’s not like she’s selfish as she doesn’t talk about her, for reference she doesn’t do much has had the same job 30 years, doesn’t really socialise or have hobbies.

Would you do or say something? Sometimes I feel like interrupting her stories with ‘who the hell are these people I have absolutely no interest in can we talk about something else?!’. If I try to start conversations she just doesn’t engage and changes the subject back to something incredibly boring and unimportant. Does anyone else know anyone that does this?!

Exes parents were like this. Spent many a Sunday bored to tears hearing about number 5's uncle's brother's dog's best friend. With rugby on the tv. Bored me to tears.

My actual MIL (and FIL) now are bloody lovely and I love spending time with them.

Condolences OP. I'd limit the time I was spending alone with her. Life's too short!

I’m a bit worried I’ll end up like this (I’m mid-50’s). My mum was chronic like this. If I tried to tell her anything about my life she’d switch off but natter on and on about Tommy’s operation (her friend’s husband who I hadn’t seen in over 20 years) and what Avis’ daughter Linda’s grandaughter Megan’s Baby did. Who? I must guard against this!

DH and I have a pact not to do this. One of our parents talks mainly about what’s wrong with everything and acquaintances‘ ill health. Another mainly about politics. Depressing!

But she’s not U to not be v interested in her 6 month old GC’s development, for example. I find it almost as tedious when people talk mainly about DC.

Wouldn’t send her updates about the DC etc - let DH do that, or not, as he chooses.

Yeah, defo wouldn’t be meeting up with her without DH if she’s dull!

Does your FIL have selected deafness I wonder?

My mother has a strange habit of asking about random people in my life and asking to be remembered to them.

So this morning she asked about our cleaner and I said she was coming back this week after being furloughed and my mother said; 'Oh DO give her my best wishes'.

Um- my cleaner has never met my mother.

She asked me to give her best wishes to my colleagues as well this week.

I find that odd. But then she apparently talks about my family in irrirtating minutae to others. When i met her new next door neighbour last year the neighbour said' Oh yes,. we know all about you. You are Blue Swathes Choose who does this and this and this and is not sending your children to boarding school after all. You mum is so relieved about that she cried'.

Bizarro. Not least because the concept of boarding school was one my mother made up out of nowhere and then got very exercised about.
I

Currently listening to a friend of my dad witter about his second ex-wife's friend's daughter and thought of all of you.

My inlaws are all like this. They can talk for HOURS about nothing. About Sharon across the road and her new patio, about the special buys at Aldi, about how hot it was yesterday. Just total banal nonsense.

But not the important stuff about DS's exam results and Uni plans, about potential redundancies at DH's work, about my returning to Uni for an advanced degree.

Nope. Just low-level shit. It's extremely wearing.

My DM has always been like this. Nothing to do with her age.

@Ritascornershop

I’m a bit worried I’ll end up like this (I’m mid-50’s). My mum was chronic like this. If I tried to tell her anything about my life she’d switch off but natter on and on about Tommy’s operation (her friend’s husband who I hadn’t seen in over 20 years) and what Avis’ daughter Linda’s grandaughter Megan’s Baby did. Who? I must guard against this!

This is how I feel. I already have a tendency to witter to fill the gap if there's an awkward silence. And I already repeat myself after a couple of classes of wine.

There are also lots of people who show v little interest in others, eg family, and/or don’t take turns in conversations.

poor social skills / company. Avoid!

MIL does the same. She'll start talking about some random person, DH asks who. 'You know, Doris? Doris? June's mum? Doris? She babysat you when we lived in Blah Blah Street!'

DH 'I never lived there. The first house I lived in was Thingy Close'

MIL: - 'Oh, it must have been your brother. Anyway, Doris has had new windows fitted. What do you think of them?'

DH: WHO THE FUCK IS DORIS?!

My mum was a bit like this and we used to roll our eyes when she got started.

She had a stroke and now can’t speak at all. I would give my eye teeth to hear her talking ‘rubbish’ 😢

My MIL is the same. I know everything about her and she knows hardly anything about me all these years later. If I ever try to start a conversation she either talks over me, or turns her head to start talking to someone else.

My FIL is here now doing just this. He'll talk for hours about such utter drivel. And about people I don't know.
Never asks us a question about our life. He has no idea what I do for a living as he never asks.
Every story anyone starts is always twisted around to his story.
He's incapable of listening to anyone, he just wants to talk.

My mum just bitches about people or says Daily Mail opinions. Always has. She's not very bright.

Mine starting going on about 'some poor girl' once, telling me all her woes. I assumed it was someone she knew until it became apparent this was a friend of someone we both know loosely and she'd never in fact met this person or even spoken to her! She'd seen a post on a mutual acquaintance's Facebook about her friend's (admittedly tough) situation, then not only Facebook stalked this person to find out more, was brazen enough to be telling me all about her as though she knew her!

Yep I’m another with a MIL like this. If she isn’t bitching criticising and gossiping about friends and family, she talks about such inane crap because ultimately, her life is a sad empty one. The only way to not suffer it is to get up and leave the room and leave some poor sucker sitting there to be her victim.

I know I should feel sorry for her but she’s horrible so I can’t.

My MIL is dead now, but her conversation was always about her friends, gossip about neighbours and anecdotes I had heard a thousand times before. She never asked questions .
My mother talks about her past endlessly, or people I don’t know and have never met. Life narrows as people get older.

Remembered another MIL one. She was ranting how horrible this woman was, had cheated on her husband, left the kids in bed when she went to see her 'fancy man'. She was talking about a character in a soap.

My in-laws tell me in extreme detail about dogs they met on their walks. You're not alone.

We genuinely stop for cake / a treat if we get away from FIL & his wife without a conversation about who has died, who is dying, who is in hospital, who is 'on their way out' or dead pets.

It's quite a rare treat.

My MIL is like this too. She sits gossiping about people neither DH or I know, people from the pub and such. She honestly never shuts up at times too and we don’t really know what she’s talking about!

To be fair though, I'm not really interested in people talking about their children either, even if I'm related to them!

I live alone with my dog and if it weren't for my job, which involves talking to people all day, I have a feeling all my conversations would go 'ooohs a good girl then? Yoo is, yes!' to everyone I meet.

LOL yes my parents did this all the time .