What's the worst thing you have ever cooked or been served.

[JustOneLastThing]

I once made a beef pasta thing, it had 20 cloves of garlic! I followed the recipe to the letter, it took hours. I tended to it almost like I tend to the kids. It tasted like feet.

I think I can still taste it, and it was five years ago! There was so much of it, and we tried to eat it in vain. I eventually threw if away after it had festered in the freezer for a few months years.

I lived in the middle east for a time. A family friend brought us plates of food after their Eid festival. Everything was lovely- except 1 very memorable dish. It was goat meat that had been pulverised or pounded till it was the texture of hair, but in a paste like sauce. I've never seen or tasted anything like it since.

hospital carrots in jizz sauce that has done me in!

@Wincarnis I think I'd rather starve to death than eat a sardine pie

Made - vegetable jalousie. Recipe said 2 tsp of flour and I put in 2 tablespoons. It was rank, you could have hung wallpaper with the inside of it.

Served - friend opened a tin of mac and cheese before putting raw mince in it and stirring it through. Then put it in the oven for about ten minutes. I feined a headache and left.

The hospital carrots reminded me I got served Kidney soup on a urology ward it smelled like hot piss

@catinb0oots me too, it was disgusting. Sardines & sour cream. Caused a really big argument too!

Anything my SIL cooks

She did a stir fry for 7 and we literally got a spoonful of stirfry and a couple of noodles.

Another time her and her dh hadn't communicated. He chopped up potatoes for the 5000. She was making Bolognese. She flung an oxo cube in. I got 1 half of it no dissolved and dh got the other half!

The time she gave us pate and took the huff because I was pregnant.

There's lots...

I once put oven cleaner on the inside of the oven, forgot, turned it on (and somehow failed to smell it) put a large duck in, and went off to the pub. Returned 2 hours later to a vile coal black mummified thing the size of a sparrow. Pitiful (& probably carcinogenic). Didn't serve it.

Been served:
My exH cooked me a 'mystery meat' curry the first time I went to his house. He told me to 'sit and watch TV' whilst he went into the kitchen. 3 hours, later, drunk, he gave me still raw meat in a tinned HomePride 'curry sauce'. Cold. No idea what he'd been doing in there. I didn't learn from this, married him, and I prepared ALL food, every single meal and snack. for the next 20 yrs (plus, he was a twat).

Dd recently came back from 'Sunday Lunch' at his house. She said she couldn't eat the chicken as it was raw. So he gave her tuna with her 'roast lunch'. A can of tuna in oil, only partially drained, plonked on top of her 'roast lunch'. Ds was sick from the chicken. He's still crap.

@LadyofTheManners

Oh god

DP got back in touch with an old mate who said we had to come over for dinner as his girlfriend was an amazing cook.
It went on a while but we hadn't been over ASI had the worst month of constant morning sickness and even the smell of food made me heave.
Once it calmed down, we got a babysitter for our DD, I managed to find something nice to wear with my bump, and off we went with the promise of chef quality delights we'd been assured of.

Man oh man. I have no idea if he was just really loved up or genuinely had the worst taste in food (and women as it turned out, she was vile).

She said she was doing a curry.

She then opened a tin of Tesco value curry sauce. She stuck it in a microwave bowl with some chunks of sandwich chicken. She then stuck some micro rice in and served it.
He then adds raw chopped onion with a flourish.

It was rank. Literally congealed and cold and tasteless. We were both looking at each other like, what?
He had been bigging her up for weeks and weeks and then that.
I couldn't eat it and she stood over me and barked "what's wrong with it?"
I blamed pregnancy sickness but DP wasn't so lucky.
We got fish and chips on the way home and left as soon as it was polite, the atmosphere was awful.

He's a lovely fellow as well!

She should get together with my ExH.

They are a match made in heaven!

To be fair, chicken that has been wrapped in bacon often is pink. It's not undercooked. I know this because I pathologically overcook my chicken - and it's still pink when there's bacon involved.

I've just remembered the sushi I had at a friend's birthday. The rice was absolutely welded together, and it honestly felt like it was stacking up like Lego bricks in my stomach!

Last week DH and I decided to cook spag bol. (DS has ASD and won't eat mushrooms or onions, so we have to puree them)

Whilst he was merrily pureeing the veg, I chucked in five raw garlic cloves (first mistake) He also added the old 'off' slimy mushrooms, instead of the new pack (second mistake). Resulting mixture looked like green bile.

Never mind, I thought, keep frying on the hob and it will sweeten up . Only it didn't. This noxious mixture of green bile, bubbled away looking like something from a witch's cauldron. The taste was out of this world, the most bitter thing, I've ever tasted, with the overpowering stench of raw garlic. I kept sampling it (in the hope it would sweeten). It didn't, and a week later I can still taste it!