I've found a property

[tectonicplates]

A ten bedroom detached house, for the bargain price of 40 MILLION POUNDS, which I can totally afford - I choose to live in a one bedroom flat just for fun, obviously. This is a lot of money even for the area, although it is on a lovely road near Hampstead Heath.

www.zoopla.co.uk/new-homes/details/53120999

I don't like the design of the house from the outside, and I think the inside is just a little bit too glitzy for me. Mind you, it has a lift! And a lovely porthole to look into the swimming pool. I do like round windows, so at least that's something.

On the downside, it's a 22 minute walk to the tube, and it's on the Northern Line, which sucks. I might just have to buy a Ferrari to get myself around town.

Also just noticed it has a staff lodge. I was just thinking we'd need to hire a cleaner for a house of that size. I wonder if the staff come with the house, or if you have to hire them separately? I've never hired anyone before so I don't know how it works.

That looks like a business site!

It’s horrible. Amazing view though!

How dare you! It's very clearly listed as a bespoke family home, thank you very much. Mind you, now that lots of people are working from home, it does look like there'd be plenty of room to start a business.

Council tax is pretty affordable so that is something...

You would definitely need more than one cleaner, to keep all those glass surfaces nice and shiny.

My dream is to win enough money on the lottery to buy a plot and design my own bespoke home - but there would be much less marble and glass, and much more craft storage and book space. I’d have a lift, though (to ‘future proof’ the house), and I’d love a pool and my own gym (then I’d have no excuse to get some exercise and stop being completely spherical).

I’d be forever cleaning all the glass! It would drive me to insanity seeing all the smears on the windows and mirrors.

Weird though, having a house built especially for you then selling it to someone else?
If I was having a housed bespoked it would have a reading turret, fireplaces in every room, a wildflower meadow and a swimming pond.

Money can't buy taste can it 😂

There a nice Queen Anne manor house with two lakes and whatnot near me for only £8million - I'm going for that one

‘I’d like a completely bland house that looks a bit like the headquarters of an insurance company on a by-pass please. The inside should look like the sort of hotel you might enjoy for two nights in Vegas’

@Fanthorpe

Weird though, having a house built especially for you then selling it to someone else? If I was having a housed bespoked it would have a reading turret, fireplaces in every room, a wildflower meadow and a swimming pond.

That's the trouble with bespoke houses, I guess. Only the original family likes the place and then it could get difficult to sell.

If you want a reading turret, there's one in this 11 bedroom house in Hampstead, which is much more affordable at £15,995,000 www.zoopla.co.uk/for-sale/details/52464356

I am seriously hoping that the owner of that pays more than the £42/mtg for water that Zzopla suggests. If not, I was a significant rebate for the water at my three bed!

My guess is that it was going to be a spa that obviously they can't open now due to lockdown, so they're having a quick go at seeing if anyone with more money than sense comes along to buy it off them.

But £40M? Surely that's a typo and it's £4M, which would be more in line with the rest of the area.

Christ. Just shows me that in either house money can't buy taste.

@tectonicplates

How dare you! It's very clearly listed as a bespoke family home, thank you very much. Mind you, now that lots of people are working from home, it does look like there'd be plenty of room to start a business.

I don't know, I mean it's quite, erm, unusual looking. I would suggest that you use it as a party house, that way the design can be part of the fun.

I suggest here for the family home - there's an outbuilding you can keep staff in

www.zoopla.co.uk/for-sale/details/53290531?search_identifier=6e666305d210ac3fd4ab6dc306d2fe3b

There's also this listing which I can't work out whether it is the same property or not.

Some of the pictures are the same but the floorplans are different .

Whoever decided they wanted to live in a house that looked like an office block crossed with a hotel? It's hideous.

@Fanthorpe

That sounds phenomenal! Can I come live there with you?

@CherryValanc That house looks absolutely beautiful, and it's just across the road from Richmond Park. Perfect, and only £8.5 million.

That one in Hampstead is so interior designed there’s no clue at all to who might live there. I’m a bit bemused by the TV room with no discernible TV.
I bet it was lovely when it was built. All wooden panelling, Persian rugs and ticking clocks.

@BarbaraofSeville

Yeah. That's the same house.

Pretty much sorted now, Party House and Family home for just under 50 million, plus the bonus of the one-bedroomed flat for fun.

All you need know is a country getaway. Somewhere by the sea maybe?

@BarbaraofSeville

There's also this listing which I can't work out whether it is the same property or not.

Some of the pictures are the same but the floorplans are different .

It's definitely the same property, just through a different agent. The floor plans look different because Sotheby's have included the swimming pool in the floor plans, but Knight Frank haven't.

It’s all private roads up on Coombe Hill, that’s a lovely house.