Extras at a wedding - what do you actually enjoy?

[Bridecilla]

Guests will be fed and watered. Not wanting to go mad with £££ that won't make a jot of difference.

We've booked a really good wedding DJ. Beer on tap.

Glitter bar? Photo booth??

*to

If it’s a hot day/evening and the main venue is people would probably appreciate some shelter, seating and quiet outside (you mentioned a marquee). But if weather’s bad it’ll be a lot of money wasted.

If the main venue is one huge room.

Just wondering when the wedding is, and how appropriate sharing platters are in a Coronavirus age? I’m not sure exactly what you’re describing, but as a coeliac lots of different food on the same platter would fill me with dread.

Just a thought.

The best wedding I’ve been to had a lot of stuff to keep kids entertained so they weren’t running around annoying everyone. It was quite a while ago but I think there was a bouncy castle, a magician and lots of space for them to run around outside.

Also food. The only wedding I’ve ever been to where I wasn’t hungry at any point had lots of lovely decent sized canapés immediately after the ceremony, a big roast dinner not long after that and then cones of things like mini fish and chips/sausage and mash during the disco.

Actually that wedding also had singing waiters who you’d never have known weren’t just the normal waiters until they burst into song. They made the routine so tailored to the couple and their family, it was really quite amazing

I’d look at your guest list - does everyone coming know more than 1 person? Can the people who aren’t part of a group be enabled to join in or have a way in to things? Nothing worse than rocking up to a wedding to find established groups of people busy catching up over drinks then it’s a free-for-all seating plan so again the groups bag whole tables and you have guests left chatting to their own spouse and no one else all day. They can’t monopolise the bride or groom and it can be a bit lonely.

Your food sounds lovely but some people are greedy buggers and will nab fat more than their fair share. Perhaps be prepared to have more on standby to supplement the tables that run out of food quickly. If you have a buffet table how will you manage dishing food up - I’ve been to weddings where our table was called up near the end and there was barely any food left because it had all been put out at once.

Food, drink and toilets. Like a PP I have been to what was a fabulous marquee wedding in the middle of a field, but it rained, was freezing cold and the floor turned to mush becuase there was no floor covering. You had to walk outside to the portaloos which were posh portaloos but still standing in the rain waiting.

I hate gimmicks! Favours are a complete waste of money imo, they all get left behind unless they can eaten / drunk there and then.

A good white wine as alternative to beer (as not all women want beer). Also - champagne of course.

I'm doing a photo booth to appease my 13 year old daughter. That's it. No extras other than food and drink and a 2am bar with an 80s disco.

I can't wait.

If your guests are the type to enjoy it, I recommend this: lanyards or badges with people's first names on them in biggish type, and the first letter of their name in ENORMOUS type. You then say there's a prize (or just kudos or whatever) for the longest word people can make by standing in a row.

At first we were all a bit WTF, and the words were quite clean, but after a couple of drinks, racing round to find a(nother) person called Ian so you can spell out CLITORIS is surprisingly entertaining.

Our guests loved our photo booth, we decided against a sweet cart and instead opted for an ice cream tricycle which was a great hit as we were married on a blisteringly hot day, we also hired a white bouncy castle for the children at the last minute which we never regretted. Sadly the band who were fantastic played to an empty dance floor for the best part of the evening as everyone stayed outside .... I also have no idea what a glitter bar is.

Free bar and a live ceilidh band.

We had a firepit with seating all around. Somewhere warm outdoors for those chatting away from the music and somewhere where the nightowls gathered (all night).

I agree with so much of what previous posters have said.

Plenty of seating - somewhere warm in case it's cold, and shade in case it's hot. If you're going to make people stand around while photos are done, for the love of God feed and water them. If you've got a list of shots you want, give people fair warning so they can slope off to the loo/the bar/have a fag when necessary. Long photo shoots are a no-no - I still have the horror etched on my mind of a TWO HOUR wedding photo shoot on a blisteringly hot day.

Canapes are a must unless you want everyone to be trollied by the time you sit down!

I'd far rather people spent money on drink (alcoholic and otherwise) and food than on photo booths and other stuff that looks good on Instagram Fine if you do both, but if it's one or the other then guests not being fleeced for expensive drinks once the one-bottle-each-of-red-and-white-per-table has run out and/or having to do the McDonalds Dash on the way home. We've all been there

And yes, vegetarian and vegan options where necessary which should be a) checked with the venue as some venues still palm veggies and vegans off with any old nonsense (a friend just got a tiny bowl of fruit salad at a recent wedding, when the rest of us had extravagant puddings. And it was boring fruit too, just some apples and bananas) and b) ring-fenced because flexitarians and non-veggies/vegans hoover it up else!

Sounds like you're on top of it all though :)

Somewhere to sit. And please, make sure the temperature is okay.

I went to a wedding in a marquee in the grounds of a castle. They must have spent £££ on it. Lovely but early September and I was so cold. Dreadful.

My issue with photo booths etc is they take the shine away from where it should be... the dance floor!

Literally just food, drinks and somewhere for EVERYONE to sit.
It doesn't matter if Elton John pops out of the wedding cake in a thong if half the guests are famished and have been on their feet for the best part of three hours looking at the same four walls

OP I think your wedding and food sound fab. Laid back and chilled. If you like glitter then definitely go for it. Have a brilliant day.

My friend had a caricature artist doing free drawings. We've got ours on a shelf in the lounge.

@BogRollBOGOF was that an Irish cross border wedding by any chance? !! Ive been to a few of those...

Oh and music - please don't have a DJ who mistakes volume for atmosphere. I always want to chat at weddings and it gets very boring when you can't because the DJ think's he's doing a set in Ibiza rather than a post-nuptial shindig in Ipswich.

Put simply, spend your money on feeding and watering everyone as much as you can - this will make the day a good one. Keep food and drink flowing and have lots of places to sit!
Think about kids - easy access to soft drinks, plenty of space to play and somewhere safe to nap/rest.
If you have spare cash after that, choose extras you would enjoy as a guest!
The worst weddings I have been to have been those where the bride and groom have focussed on gimmicky, instagrammable extras, and not thought about guests comfort- leaving long gaps between food and the day losing energy and momentum as they spent the money on props instead (think popcorn cart/photo booth) and not on food and drink. Usually at venues with pricey drinks too!

We had lots of games and things for children at DDs wedding. Have some lovely photos of the adults playing in the garden. The children didn't get a look in.

Honestly:

• Canapés immediately, and having enough of them: most people forget to have lunch before a wedding
• Variety of drinks including soft
• Ensuring there are a few extra welcome drinks: once we were last guests to get to reception after the church as we were the only ones who’d walked and there were none left even though we were only about ten minutes later
• Music not crazy loud/ making sure there’s somewhere for older people or people tired from dancing to be able to talk
• Enough seating for people during the reception before and after the meal - standing for hours sucks even if you’re young
• Keep speeches the appropriate length: I went to one wedding where they were about 90 minutes and there wasn’t even enough seating for everyone as they did it separately from the meal. Nightmare.
• I’d say the only extras I’ve ever enjoyed are lawn games and photo booth. But photo booth you can do your own with an iPad and Bluetooth button for a fraction of the price which is what we did
• I have never thought favours, guest book, sweets trolleys, bands, fireworks etc are necessary or that anyone cares

I’d say if you have any extra budget from not doing the above the number one thing as a guest that I appreciate is an extra drink or two, it just expresses a spirit of generosity - especially if you’re having evening guests, I hate having spent a lot of money on travel, hotel and gift then not even getting a drink or two.

Speak to the brewery about bar deals - we agreed a price per keg (we have a family brewery) but only had to pay for the ones we opened. We also took back any bottles of wine that weren’t drink to the supermarket - not sure if the venue will let you supply your own wine but it saved us so much money.

Photobooth and sweet cart are lovely extras. I've enjoyed them.

Don't see the point in the huge initial letters.

Definitely enough food. Love the ones you go to with chips or tayto buffets.

I actually hate wedding bands, they're so loud and love the sound of their own voices too much. A good DJ is much better IMO.

Whenever I see a photo booth I just think.....what a total waste of money. Pick n' mix is quite fun though.