Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Extras at a wedding - what do you actually enjoy?

470 replies

Bridecilla · 26/05/2020 14:57

Guests will be fed and watered. Not wanting to go mad with £££ that won't make a jot of difference.

We've booked a really good wedding DJ. Beer on tap.

Glitter bar? Photo booth??

OP posts:
DuchessOfBeddington · 31/05/2020 13:36

I hope my post didn’t come across as preachy there!

Actually I think you are very brave for posting your question on MN chat and I’ve been surprised by how judgemental some of the responses have been.

Your wedding sounds incredible and I absolutely love the venue pictures. I’m hoping you get the weather to have the whole day outside and in the barn. Flowers

Original poster
Bridecilla · 31/05/2020 14:48

@Duchess not preachy at all! Honestly I've barely been to any weddings so I appreciate all opinions even from the wedding haters

OP posts:
SheWoreBlueVelvet · 31/05/2020 14:59

We didn’t do anything other than a drinks and nibbles after the ceremony and a glorious buffet in a swanky restaurant. Only a small do.
One of our tables bought their own glitter and did a couple of faces. Didn’t ask them to but it was quite fun.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Weddings
DuchessOfBeddington · 31/05/2020 15:05

[quote Bridecilla]@Duchess not preachy at all! Honestly I've barely been to any weddings so I appreciate all opinions even from the wedding haters[/quote]
The fun police were out in force on this thread. The best was the woman that implored brides not to provide hairspray in the ladies as it would be in a enclosed space 😂😂😂

MulticolourMophead · 31/05/2020 15:42

@C0RA

It’s interesting to see how much consensus there is on this thread. The vast majority have said the same thing

Plenty food, drink and seating
Decent music ( and somewhere to get away from it if it’s too loud)
Minimal waiting around and speeches
Venue suitable for all weathers

Totally agree.

Was talking with DD yesterday, as we got a save the date card for next Feb. These are the points on which I remember whether a wedding was good or bad.

If I ever get married (gotta meet someone first Grin) then this is how I'll do it.

MulticolourMophead · 31/05/2020 15:51

The fun police were out in force on this thread. The best was the woman that implored brides not to provide hairspray in the ladies as it would be in a enclosed space

I've recently been diagnosed as asthmatic. Aerosols aren't good for me in an enclosed space, regardless of it being deodorant, hairspray, or anything else.

Original poster
Bridecilla · 31/05/2020 15:56

The bathroom is tiny - literally 2 loos and a sink so no toiletry basket.

I will get a few bottles of suncream if the weather is good though as that's something I'd definitely forget to take with me as a guest!

OP posts:
Ginfordinner · 31/05/2020 17:12

The fun police were out in force on this thread. The best was the woman that implored brides not to provide hairspray in the ladies as it would be in a enclosed space 😂😂😂

That will be me, whose daughter has asthma, which is triggered by people spraying hairspray in enclosed spaces, and whose mum had COPD Hmm

You clearly have absolutely no idea how damaging aerosols can be for people with asthma or other breathing issues. So take your stupidity and laughing at other people’s health issues elsewhere Angry

Thank you @MulticolourMophead

OP you sound lovely, and I hope you have a beautiful day for your wedding.

Lotsalotsagiggles · 31/05/2020 17:17

We had a bouncy castle and a big deck chair for photo opportunities as well as a big Jenna etc at our country house wedding, along with hook a duck etc to keep people entertained between things

healthylifestylee · 31/05/2020 17:17

Love the idea of disposable cameras on each table - this theme may go really well with what sounds like a dream wedding
A hog roast!! I've got to remember that one

Comefromaway · 31/05/2020 18:36

Agree with regards to the aerosols. It’s not being the fun police, it’s trying to prevent someone being seriously ill.

user127820 · 31/05/2020 18:59

OP, as much as glitter bars aren't everyone's cup of tea, if it's what you want, go for it. I think as long as you have good food to meet everyone's needs, seating in a cool (during summer) room, and generally make sure your guests are comfortable, they'll be happy. No-one reasonable would be upset about glitter bars etc as long as they are comfortable and aren't forced to do anything they don't want to.

user127820 · 31/05/2020 19:00

Assuming nothing you do is harmful of course! I.e no balloon or dove releases. I would be annoyed by that.

DuchessOfBeddington · 31/05/2020 19:47

ginfordinner

I myself think it’s rude as hell to use strong smelling products like nail varnish or sprays in confined spaces like trains and loos, but I wouldn’t confront anyone over it.

There was no mention in the PP that this was due to a condition like severe asthma. I thought it was just a dislike. To be honest I don’t know anyone personally with asthma, so I’m afraid don’t know much about it. Going to have a bit of a read up now and educate myself about it.

However, I would expect a person with a condition that dangerous to themselves to contact the event organisers in the same way that someone with a peanut allergy would. Obviously then signage could be placed in the ladies asking guests to refrain from using aerosols etc. People are capable of taking the responsibility to manage their conditions in this way. I never meant to offend anyone with asthma!

Original poster
Bridecilla · 31/05/2020 19:47

@Lotsalotsagiggles your wedding sounds fun!!

@user127820 absolutely no balloon or five releases, I find those really upsetting

OP posts:
Comefromaway · 31/05/2020 19:58

Duchess, my daughters college has banned it in the changing rooms & toilets (despite the girls having to put their hair in a bun every day) as have the local theatre dressing rooms) due to the likelihood of giving someone an asthma attack.

DuchessOfBeddington · 31/05/2020 19:58

An extra at a wedding I hated was the couple that put 3 live goldfish in a bowl at each table as a centrepiece. I was working at the wedding, and the bride told me she only paid for the fish to be delivered and ‘set up’ and not to be collected.

She thought the guests would want to take them home as favours but hardly anyone did. She was running around the hotel the next day trying to get rid of them. I took 3 home and bought a tank etc that afternoon, but one of them died the first night after all the stress they had been through.

Overnight in the hotel about half of them died. It was pretty heartbreaking, and I did think it was so cruel to do this just so the centrepieces would be different.

Comefromaway · 31/05/2020 19:59

That is appalling.

DuchessOfBeddington · 31/05/2020 20:01

@Comefromaway

Duchess, my daughters college has banned it in the changing rooms & toilets (despite the girls having to put their hair in a bun every day) as have the local theatre dressing rooms) due to the likelihood of giving someone an asthma attack.
As I said, none of my family or friends have asthma, so I honestly just thought it was people hating the smell.

I stand corrected, and I’m sorry for any offence caused.

Comefromaway · 31/05/2020 20:01

The likelihood of there not being at least one person at a wedding with asthma is very low. It doesn’t even have to be that severe for an aerosol to set it off.

Comefromaway · 31/05/2020 20:02

She honestly thought the guests would take them home as favours!

Fluffycloudland77 · 31/05/2020 20:05

Those poor fish, the stress must have been intense for them.

Why are people so inconsiderate to animals.

Original poster
Bridecilla · 31/05/2020 20:06

@DuchessOfBeddington

An extra at a wedding I hated was the couple that put 3 live goldfish in a bowl at each table as a centrepiece. I was working at the wedding, and the bride told me she only paid for the fish to be delivered and ‘set up’ and not to be collected.

She thought the guests would want to take them home as favours but hardly anyone did. She was running around the hotel the next day trying to get rid of them. I took 3 home and bought a tank etc that afternoon, but one of them died the first night after all the stress they had been through.

Overnight in the hotel about half of them died. It was pretty heartbreaking, and I did think it was so cruel to do this just so the centrepieces would be different.

That's utterly horrific 😪
OP posts:
DuchessOfBeddington · 31/05/2020 20:17

@Comefromaway

She honestly thought the guests would take them home as favours!
She really did! She told me the company she used offered a pick up service (including the dead ones I assume!) but they actually suggested to her that people would take them home. She was so desperate the next morning she was going round the hotel staff to help her. Absolutely clueless and so thoughtless of her!!!

I got on the bus with my goldfish (In a big empty catering mayonnaise tub) but had to spend a lot of money on the tank, filter, food, plants they like to eat etc. It’s crazy to think guests would want to take them home.

YukoandHiro · 31/05/2020 20:23

Decent canapés and booze/cocktails for the dead zone between ceremony and dinner

Nice favours, not just boiled sweets