Why get drunk when you have kids in the house?

[ItchyScratch]

Some of you might tell me to keep my nose out.

But scrolling through Facebook today (I really don’t know why I bother seen as it angers me more than it pleases me)

And many couples I know posting their kitchen work tops full of alcohol and how they are going to get drunk today. Couples who have kids.
And obviously it’s lockdown so they are definitely in charge of kids.

It’s taking all my tongue biting not to say something to them. Probably why it makes me let some of the steam off by writing this post. Why would you get drunk when you have kids?

You might say, how do you know they are getting drunk?
Well a couple with a photo of a huge crate of Budweiser and 4 bottles of prosecco amongst spirits are not exactly having a small glass.

It’s neglect.

I’m having a few drinks this afternoon while the kids are pottering about. May get a bit tipsy but not enough to effect my ability to look after my dc.
It’s a gorgeous day, sitting in the sun with a beer is my favourite pastime

I could photograph our bar right now. There's a couple of keg's of beer. A few bottles of wine. A range of spirits. Some nice liqueurs. A couple of crates of strawberry beer.

I'm about to have share a jig of Pimm's with DH, and maybe a glass of wine later. Having alcohol in the house doesn't make us alcoholics...

Well, if you saw my downstairs loo, it has enough alcohol in it to open a pub (we are well stocked and like supporting our local small businesses). I, in fact, had a glass of wine in the sun in the garden this afternoon while toddler napped. We quite frequently enjoy several glasses on a Friday or Saturday evening. So far, yet to lose a child down a well.

I've managed to successfully raise two children to the age of 17 and 13 without ever having to drive. Taxis exist you know? As do buses and in real emergencies ambulances.

There should always be someone sober to drive in an emergency

Nonsense. Plenty of people can't drive. In any case, emergencies don't only happen to children - what if a couple with no kids are having a night in, must one of them stay sober enough to drive (here in Scotland that means not even one drink) in case the other one has a seizure, or a heart attack, or a stroke? Ambulance or taxi.

How do you know which one needs to stay sober Dues?

Because it’s upsetting and frightening for the kids?

And the Hyperbole Of The Week award goes to...

Drinking when in care of children is not neglect! It's neglect when the needs of the children Aren't met due to their parents alcohol use.
Completely different thing.
Also having a couple of spliffa isn't seen as neglect either. Social care have much bigger fish to fry.

Of course we drink with the children at home - they're never not home! Even pre-pandemic the only time they're not in the house is if they're at school, and that doesn't strike me as the best time to get drunk either

We don't have a car so does that mean we can drink as much as we want, or does it mean that we're in a permanent state of sub-par parenting?

There,s different levels of drunk isn,t there. One needs to be able to tend to a child and recognise childs needs. You can have a drink and still do this. If you can,t then you have drunk too much. However say something did go wrong and it had absolutely nothing to do with the drink you have had, you could still be used against you.

A few drinks or spliffs is only neglect if it actually causes the parent to neglect the children. Otherwise it's not neglect.

^^thats not normal or ok. It's completely failing as a parent

I agree with you OP. I struggle with the "come home from work and open a bottle of wine" mentality. I think a lot of social events in this country revolve around alcohol in a way that they don't where I'm from.

Normalising alcohol consumption in front of children has always worried me but then I'm in the minority.

It's only really when I go back that I realise that it's not normal, it's just "usual" in this country (and admittedly some others in Europe).

I’m sure most parents have a few drinks in the house, as long as there not mortal drunk and unable to care for the children you can’t call in neglect. I suspect alcohol is keeping a lot of parents sane at the minute

chunkyrun between me and dh with the in Olmert of some spliffs and beers: we have all hardened as a family, done a spelling test (hardarses making DJ doing it on a bank holiday!), had a water fight and enjoyed listening to music together as a family in the garden. It really isn’t neglect as because the children sent benign neglected!

I don't think being drunk in front of children is at all good. We may have a beer or wine or whatever, but never to excess. I have distanced myself from some friends whose family get togethers are always quite drunkenly, it's not a scene I want my children around. Judgey? Yep, probably.

Ffs. I’m having a wine in the garden right now and DS12 is playing on the PlayStation. He’s fine.

Not sure I could interpret your message overly well Moonbaby, but spliffs in front of kids? Another planet.

Sorry for typos! No idea what Olmert is and DJ meant ds.

Neglect? You sanctimonious misers.
And no I am not sat in my garden currently drinking.

I have an occasional gin and tonic.

But this judgmental view really gets on my nerves.

We have 5 children and cannot wait to order our Chinese takeaway later and have a few beers, me and my oh get on great,we live each others company and the company of out kids, kids love when we let our hair down and start singing karaoke, we have a few drinks maybe once a month together, we are both in our 30's so obv have cop on and hardly be falling about the place but we will have about 4 or 5 beers each and be well over the driving limit, you might even call it drunk😱and we will be merry and laugh and the kids will enjoy the evening too,and u less there is something wrong with you I think we will be more than able to call an ambulance or a cab to bring us to hospital if a problem arose, seriousily get a life op, u might even start to enjoy it, wow some people are so boring and judgemental,am just taking a sip of my first can and its amazing, happy Friday everybody 😊😊I feel sorry for you op that you are so uptight

I have got several hundred bottles of wine in my cellar. I could put a picture of them on Facebook (if I had Facebook). It wouldn't mean I was going to drink them all at once, though.

You sound very highbrow professorfrockdown

I live in Germany .When my kids were small we always met up in Biergartens with our friends their kids and our kids.We sat near the playground with our beers and our picnic .Great fun for all concerned.Nobody got plastered.The kids survived .All of them.Those were good times.

I've got 24 bottles of wine in atm. I did the responsible thing and ordered a delivery, which had minimum spend for free delivery, rather than going to the shop. I'm not going to drink them all today!

You totally should, @DateandTime