Ridiculous ‘calling in sick’ reasons

[Sofacat]

A member of staff has called in sick with a bit of a reason and it reminded me of a young member of staff years ago who called in sick with jet lag - they’d been to Ireland .

Any one else with daft reasons for calling in sick ?

Flustered colleague walks in late: some fucking idiot reported a suspicious package on the tube that turned out to be a left lunchbox. They stopped all the trains.

Other colleague: oh ummm I reported a suspicious package when I got off at x (x being our station for work!)

My worst was when I turned up still pissed hungover to my waitress/bar shift. I puked in the toilets 3 times in the first ten mins then told the manager I couldn't work and was going home because I had come down with a tummy bug. This would not been so bad had the copious amounts of alcohol leading to the hangover not been consumed in that same bar the night before!

A colleague called to say his flat mate had gone away and left him locked in his flat. 3 days he was locked in that flat.

One of my colleagues left mid-meeting after a call from his wife. Literally just ran out of the door so we were all worried. Turns out that she'd rung him to tell him that she couldn't find the dogs lead.

I once had to ring work to say I'd be late as I was out jogging and ran straight into a lamp post. My nose just wouldn't stop bleeding!

We had someone call in sick for jet lag who had been to Portugal... she called in sick a lot and ended up with a written warning for that one.

Some idiot called in saying he had two flat tyres and wasn’t going to make it in. Having posted videos of himself at 3am out on the town. Another written warning.

We had a young un at work who ‘called in suck’ as it was raining and she did not have a brolly.

some fucking idiot reported a suspicious package on the tube that turned out to be a left lunchbox.

That isn’t a ‘fucking idiot’ thing to do in the slightest. Anyone who lived through the days of IRA bombs would know that.

I once had to call and say I'd be late because my parrot had flown into my poached egg, then into my hair, and I had to wash yolk out of it.

My secretary phoned in sick once because she’d seen a squashed squirrel in the road on her way in and it had upset her so much she couldn’t carry on driving. Delicate flower she was .

I had to call to say I'd be late after my cat brought a live bird into the kitchen just as I was about to leave. Took me half an hour to catch it!

And my best friends Mum had to phone in late because she’d ‘been stuck on the toilet for over an hour’. Her boss was concerned for her, thinking d and v, and said she should have the day off. So she had to explain to that no, she was just stuck sitting on the toilet because she had stripped off in the bathroom (just moved in, no curtains up) and due to some major disruption of some kind, a packed train going in to Liverpool Street was stuck at a red light on the train line that ran at the bottom of her garden, and if she stood up a fair few carriages of commuters would see her starkers. So she stayed put til they’d got moving again.

Not calling in sick, but I once had someone fill in an accident report form for a paper cut. We work in a bookshop.

The condom had split the night before and colleague was going to be late because she had to get the MAP. Perfectly genuine, but maybe TMI.

A colleague who has recently left used to call in sick because her child had a cough and needed looking after. Her child was 14.

Some of these are , I dread to think how people would cope if something serious happened to them.

@,vampirethriller 😂😂😂😂

• 'I saw everyone avoiding something on the footpath and walking around it, so I decided to walk straight through it. Turns out it was a gigantic dog turd and I slipped in it. It went from my hair down to my feet and I had to go home to wash it all out'

• 'I had to be my cousins interpreter in a trial'. My question: but they have official court interpreters for that, not a family member!

-' I couldn't find my tampon!'

These are brilliant! I once called in sick because I had a huge spot hanging off my lip. I was a teenager and darent leave the house. Didn't say that though just lied through my teeth.

An acquaintance was surprised and annoyed that workplace relationships weren't good whilst taking multiple absences for days where her skin flared up as she couldn't wear foundation.

I had a few student absences because they're tired, but they always happened to occur on the day a new games console game releases and had text their mates bragging.

I have a colleague who takes every opportunity to call in, has had a jaw dropping amount of absence in the last 12 months (and i do know the reasons), and often arrives late and leaves early. I'm diplomatic face to face, but incensed with the sense of entitlement, lack of integrity and the expectation that the team will just pick up the extra work.

As for my own worst call in, I'd once been prescribed sleeping tablets. I was like a zombie the next morning. I told my manager the truth, felt like an idiot. I may as well have phoned in work a hangover.

Some of these are gobsmackingly awful.

I can't believe there are businesses that accept this crap (and people with such selfish attitudes) Where I work they'd be lining up the P45!

On the flip side in my first job I had a really nasty fall (not drunk or anything). I sprained my ankle so badly I could barely hobble. I was a waitress so had to call in sick. I ended up signed off for two weeks, strong painkillers, all bound up, lined up for physio. I got disciplined! I was still bandaged up when I went back and I had a doctor's note. They were horrible though.

Mind you, I read about a man who went climbing in the Alps, became lost, fell, needed to be rescued and airlifted to hospital. He barely made it. He received the letter from his firm informing him he was fired in his hospital bed having lost three fingers to frostbite. So if you thought your workplace was harsh, you'd be wrong.

A young guy living close to me didn't want to go to work so got his friend to call in a bomb threat. Not in the least bit funny, but completely ridiculous!
www.irishtimes.com/news/crime-and-law/courts/circuit-court/man-paid-friend-to-make-hoax-bomb-call-to-intel-to-avoid-work-1.2442051

Idiots, the pair of them!

This is a quite embarrassing.

When I was 16 I had the best job in the world - I worked in a small independent record shop. It was just me, all day. I could smoke, drink coffee and listen to whatever I wanted, and I got paid for it. Great (or rather it was great apart from the 30 year old owner sexually harassing me, but he wasn’t there often).

My mum’s house had a front door into the porch, then a porch door. Both had Yale locks and deadlocks on them. I stepped into the porch and closed the front door behind me. Went to open the porch door and the deadlock was on. Realised I’d left the keys inside and couldn’t get out or back into the house. Had no mobile phone then either. I had to wait 4 hours for someone to come home. It was bloody hot in there too. Obviously I didn’t call in though, as I couldn’t!

Definitely the most stupid reason I’ve ever missed a day of work.