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Original poster

Does anyone still think about their first love?

94 replies

priscillanotofthedesert · 22/02/2020 20:58

Just that really. I am very happily married to my DH who is wonderful and we have lovely DC, but I still think about my first love who I haven't seen or heard from since I was 18. He has got absolutely no social media presence whatsoever so I haven't got the first clue what he's up to these days or where he is.

I've had several long term relationships since him, and I adore my DH, but I have never felt quite the same way about anyone as I did my first love.

Anyone else?!

OP posts:
LittleMachine · 22/02/2020 20:59

Mine moved in next door to my dad, so I had no choice 😂

Original poster
priscillanotofthedesert · 22/02/2020 21:00

Omg! How bizarre!

I kind of feel like I wouldn't want to see him again really as I've no idea what kind of feelings it would stir up.

OP posts:
LittleMachine · 22/02/2020 21:06

We were/are friends on Facebook, and I knew it was happening so it wasn't a shock. I was friends with his now DW, and we have lots of mutual friends. He's the only one of my exes I'm on good terms with..although I'm not sure he is an ex as we had a bit of a complicated relationship/non-relationship! He doesn't live there now but I see him around and we have a hug and a chat and it's not weird. I have no feelings for him other than fondness, whereas I hate all my other exes.

What is weird, is that we now look really alike and could pass for siblings 😩 We didn't when we were younger.

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MrsT1405 · 22/02/2020 21:26

I married my first love nearly 40 years after my dad broke us up. I was married with 2 teenagers when we got in touch. 10 weeks later......even though we lived several hundred miles apart...we set up home together. I divorced my 1st husband and promptly married my first love. That was 18 years ago. I don't regret it for a moment ,even though its cost me my dc and grandchildren.

PegasusReturns · 22/02/2020 21:30

@mrsT

Half way through your post I was about to say what a wonderful story but you have up your kids?! Wow 😮

Elouera · 22/02/2020 21:31

I dated my '1st love' for 3yrs, but we grew apart. He is now married to his husband, as am I!!! We met up several years after we broke up and I was glad he'd found what he'd been looking for a was happy. We are 'friend' on facebook, but haven't met up now for over 10yrs. I do still wonder how he is, his sisters and mum etc. As a teen, being part of someones life for 3yrs was a big part of my life, so I do wonder how they all are now.

Fedupwithmyhouse · 22/02/2020 21:32

There’s one guy that I think about all the time. If we’d given things a go we’d likely have been engaged by now.

MaxPaddyandHarry · 22/02/2020 21:34

I do. I go through the village he lived in on the way to visit my mother. I did try looking him up on social media but couldn't find him.
I am happily married, and can see that it wouldn't have worked, but I would like to know that he was happy too.

EggysMom · 22/02/2020 21:44

I 're-found' my first love via Friends Reunited many years back, and we've stayed in occasional contact since. He doesn't have much of a social media presence, which is probably just as well as I'd stalk him like mad Blush but we do occasionally exchange emails about what we're up to and what bands we've been to see.

He is the one that got away, thanks to my own naivety.

MulticolourMophead · 22/02/2020 21:47

I can look back and see he and I would never have lasted whatever, but would like to know how he got on, and if he manged to achieve his goals.

GlummyMcGlummerson · 22/02/2020 21:56

I think about what an absolute freak he turned out to be and how I had a lucky escape. Does that count? Grin

jackparlabane · 22/02/2020 22:01

I chat to mine on Facebook every now and then. Lovely guy, just we weren't right for each other. DH complains he got me into a band he hates, but I point out he also got me into being interested in men, so he really shouldn't complain...

ilovetomatoes · 22/02/2020 22:04

No. He’s a total weirdo so I blocked him. I actually can’t believe how much I was into him. 3 years I was totally besotted! I had a lucky escape.

Margotshypotheticaldog · 22/02/2020 22:05

I'm in my late 40s and have never been in love. 😕 But ssh, don't tell my husband....

Starface · 22/02/2020 22:10

Yes. We have messaged recently about parental death. He was fab, has grown into all his good points. But definitely wasn't the right match for me. Great guy though.

Namethecat · 22/02/2020 22:13

Met mine on holiday with my parents , I was 17. He was the same age and had just joined the RAF. He used to drive to visit me and stay at my parents , and I visit him on the train.
We dated for around 9 months but because I wanted a boyfriend closer to home I ditched him.
His parents wrote to mine to say if they'd had a daughter they would have wanted one like me.
Many , many ( many) years later I sometimes wonder what if.

SagaBauer · 22/02/2020 22:13

I sometimes think about him and his family. His step father was verbally and emotionally abusive towards him. And we once babysat for his Aunt and she was actually neglecting her children- the mattresses were bare, the kids were urinating in their bedrooms, the kitchen was full of dog shit and no food in the cupboards. It was really sad, and really shocking to 15 year old me. I really hope social services got involved Sad I know my ex moved away to uni and is now married, so hopefully a happy ending for him.

Bagofoldbones · 22/02/2020 22:14

I still talk to mine. Dd1 dad. I’ve known him since I was 14 and I’m in my 40s now. I really do see as him as uncle dick head Grin

NameChangedJustToPostThis · 22/02/2020 22:22

I think about my first love sometimes and he crops up in conversation occasionally with family. He was a massive part of my life between the ages of 18-21.

My family weren't overly keen on him... but I was infatuated. And still have fond memories of the time we spent together.

He's remained friends with a mate of mine on FB, so I hear through them what's going on in his life.

I've been tempted to reach out and send him a message (bereavement related) but then again I remind myself we split for a reason... and he seems happy now so I've kind of put that part of my life in a box and stored it away.

I look back fondly on those years. Waaaah I'm getting all emotional now!

NameChangedJustToPostThis · 22/02/2020 22:25

@Bagofoldbones

Uncle Dick Head

GrinGrinGrin

ComeTheFuck0nBridget · 22/02/2020 22:36

Well, I've only ever loved DH but I do think about my first boyfriend sometimes. We were very on and off again, in fact I don't think we ever actually were officially boyfriend and girlfriend but we had so much fun together. I was 16-17 and we were just drinking and having fun with our friends, and so carefree. Very fond memories, some of the best times of my life.

conduitoffortune · 22/02/2020 22:38

Lots of people on here have fond memories of their first loves! My first love was a massive dickhead and I am ashamed that I lost my virginity to him 😬

SpanielPlusToddler · 22/02/2020 22:49

My first love and I were only together for a year or so, when we were 16. Split because we were both so young and he had a hard time with his difficult family. He was such a kind and lovely guy, but looking back he was really hurting. I still saw him occasionally when I visited my home town. 6 or 7 years later he committed suicide. Such a terrible, sad waste of a life and a lovely person.

NameChangedJustToPostThis · 22/02/2020 23:10

@SpanielPlusToddler

That's so sad, I'm sorry to hear that was the outcome. Thanks

Be1atrix · 22/02/2020 23:24

I'm the same as you OP!

I feel sad about it sometimes as we don't talk and haven't for a decade. But I'm glad too, as I'm super happily married and would hate for old feelings to be stirred up.