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Original poster

Phillip Schofield has come out as gay

999 replies

catinb0oots · 07/02/2020 09:59

Blimey. Married for 27 years.

OP posts:
JuanSheetIsPlenty · 07/02/2020 12:01

I’ll clarify. The specific way in which he interacts with women is something I recognise in some gay men I know IRL and some in the public eye too. It was that specific behaviour that made me wonder if he was a not yet out gay man. This is certainly not to say gay men are women haters.

Urkiddingright · 07/02/2020 12:01

I only feel sorry for his wife and daughters, zilch sympathy for him and I don’t think there is anything brave about lying to your wife for 27 years. Poor woman, the whole marriage was built on deceit.

SarahAndQuack · 07/02/2020 12:01

That's just not true, @GFJoe.

Lots of people don't know they're gay.

Some people do think their sexuality shifts during their lifetime (eg., Molly Wizenberg, who has a book on the subject coming out - she's a US food writer).

It is perfectly possible for someone to have thought all sorts of things, including 'argh, I thought I was gay but, thank goodness, I've met this woman and I love her so I must be straight'.

JaneJeffer · 07/02/2020 12:02

Why was my post deleted? Best post of the thread too Grin

woodchuck99 · 07/02/2020 12:04

I was thought it was going and was quite surprised that he had been married for 27 years. As for the "poor wife" comments I bet she has known for a long time. He is probably coming out because he knows the information is going to be in the news anyway. The media have been taking a lot of interest in him lately and I bet this is a case of making the announcement before they do.

woodchuck99 · 07/02/2020 12:04

it was going he was gay

Wheresthebeach · 07/02/2020 12:05

@WhatKatyDidNot - agree.

I don't care about him being gay. Being gay isn't big news anymore is it? It's perfectly normal.

Really feel for his wife, 27 years? Isn't he brave, isn't she supportive talk just doesn't sit well.

I don't know if he realised he was gay 30 years ago, or 3...unless his wife knew from day 1 this is, or would have been, devastating. Where is the concern for her in all this?

FabbyChix · 07/02/2020 12:05

Brave man much love to him and his family

woodchuck99 · 07/02/2020 12:05

I only feel sorry for his wife and daughters, zilch sympathy for him and I don’t think there is anything brave about lying to your wife for 27 years. Poor woman, the whole marriage was built on deceit.

You don't know that he has been lying to her and that the marriage has been built on deceit. She may have always known and the setup may have suited her. He knows.

woodchuck99 · 07/02/2020 12:06

He knows who knows

yolofish · 07/02/2020 12:07

Even if they have been discussing poor brave Phil's mental anguish for years, it's still not going to be nice for his wife or daughters.

Sounds exhausting actually!

And when your world is based on one premise and that's taken away, that's quite shocking.

aNonnyMouse1511 · 07/02/2020 12:07

Ah love him ❤️ So brave

unicornsrule · 07/02/2020 12:07

I love phillip watch him every day on this morning so emotional on this morning
He is very brave coming out

Urkiddingright · 07/02/2020 12:07

So she chose to marry and procreate with a gay man rather than a heterosexual one who would actually fully and completely love her? Doubt it. He used her to cover up his own ‘shame’. He married her in the bloody 90s, not the 60s when it was illegal. He isn’t brave at all, quite the opposite.

motherheroic · 07/02/2020 12:08

I suspect he has told his wife and kids long before he came out publicly. You don't tell your wife and kids and then run to tell everyone the next day, it's a transition.

Halloumifriesforbreakfast · 07/02/2020 12:08

I can't believe some of these posts. Disgusting.

I am not a huge fan of PS, but I think he has been brave. Yes, a lot of hurt will have been caused, but not because he is a bad person- he isn't, but because he didn't feel able to come out and live authentically, because no matter what anybody thinks, being gay is still not always accepted, even in this country and it's bloody terrifying to finally admit to yourself who you are! Let alone anybody else! So you live the 'normal' life.

I understand where is he coming from. I left my ex partner, father of my DC and then had my first relationship with a woman and I was asked a few times why I hadn't made my mind up before having children. People don't ask this when straight couples break up, have another straight relationship and have children, but if you then move onto a same sex relationship, you should have made your bloody up apparently! Angry But that's not homophobic, right?..... pffft.

Not that I should have answered, but my response was usually along the lines of "it was difficult to accept who I thought I really was when my mum used to make gagging noises when hearing about gay people or when my dad used to tell me gay people are perverted and that's just a fact of nature".....for example.

I was 'fortunate' as I was/am very feminine, so could hide my sexuality much easier than someone who fit the stereotype. Now I realise that in a way it has actually been a bit of a hindrance.

Anyway, my point is, to those of you saying he basically should have made up his mind before now, you really don't have a clue what you're talking about.

HappyHammy · 07/02/2020 12:08

When it was "breaking news" I thought he must have died or something terrible had happened to him. I hope he and his family can support each other and find the happiness they all want.

sickandtiredofsick · 07/02/2020 12:08

For someone who is apparently a woman hater he seems to have married someone hugely understanding and supportive, has a best friend that’s a woman and 2 daughters who are also it would seem well adjusted and understanding that’s not the mark of a woman hater surely
And we don’t know he has lied or deceived for 27 years none of us were there ! How can you possibly speculate on something that’s private and for the most part in an individuals mind or within the confines of a family.

If you’re gay you can come out whenever you want or not at all, why does it matter it’s personal choice. What’s right for one person may not be right for anyone else it’s so specific to the individual you can’t expect that every LGBT person has to notify the whole world whether they want to or not the second they start to wonder who they really are that’s an invasion of privacy unless the person is totally ready themselves and when they are ready they should be fully supported.

In a day and age where mental health issues are so highlighted I think the reaction to this should be positive

Donkeytail · 07/02/2020 12:09

His wife will have known for some time as it said she is supportive.

What else are they going to say? She is angry, feels deceived, feels like her whole marriage was a lie, hates him for what he has done to her? Like she isn't going through enough shit right now without having the whole 'he's so brave' crowd coming down on her for not still being the dutiful, supportive wife.

TheSandman · 07/02/2020 12:09

@ifnot I'm not being funny but we're you around in the 80s and 90s?
See, I was around in the 90s. I remember 1993 very well and I knew lots of people in showbiz and theatre. It absolutely was not nessecary for gay men working in entertainment to have a "beard" or a sham marriage! It wasn't the bloody 50's grin

The 1980's weren't that fecking enlightened.

Section 28 ("a in Scotland) which stated that a local authority "shall not intentionally promote homosexuality or publish material with the intention of promoting homosexuality" or "promote the teaching in any maintained school of the acceptability of homosexuality as a pretended family relationship" became law at exactly the same time as he was a children's TV presenter. Can you imagine what the Murdoch owned Maggie Thatcher supporting Sun would have done to him?

I would have hidden my sexuality at that point.

sandrabullock420 · 07/02/2020 12:10

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Mrsjayy · 07/02/2020 12:11

Tbf on this morning they do keep mentioning his wife and family saying it is about them too

0v9c99f9g9d939d9f9g9h8h · 07/02/2020 12:11

What a spiteful lot you are. Amazing how much inside knowledge you have on which to base a judgement.

You don't know when he told his wife.

You don't know what he thought he knew about himself 27 years ago.

You don't know the extent of his pain or deception and can't judge either. You don't know how he feels about what his feelings have done to his family. There's no corner on pain. Feeling sympathy for one character doesn't lessen the amount of empathy you can have for someone else. Recognising life is difficult for one person doesn't imply it's less difficult for someone else. There doesn't always have to be a villain and a victim.

It's better to be honest than kill yourself which is probably what he's been driven to contemplating. You would probably have said that was selfish too, had he felt unable to go on. I expect his family would rather he made the choice to deal with the circumstances however he can and still be there for them.

And unbelievably rude of Holly to be a good friend eh. So offensive to his wife (who may well like her but it's not as fun to think that).

All the many posters who have started threads here in the past about feeling sexually confused despite being married with kids should obviously think again about the advice they were given to be honest with their partners because that was the only way forward.

Thank goodness the world is nicer than MN. You just love to hate.

hennyspennys · 07/02/2020 12:12

What an incredibly brave man, that must have been so tough.

I think it's his wife and children that are brave. He's been cowardly to keep it quiet for so long and to get married and have children. To that to a woman is unforgiveable. How must she and her children be feeling?

He was very low in my estimation, he's now entered the negative numbers.

I wonder now if it was a good idea letting him loose in the broom cupboard with Gordon.

KatyCarrCan · 07/02/2020 12:12

I think all this fawning and pretending the 1980s were the dark ages, does a real disservice to the LGB community. Acting as though he couldn't have come out rather than he chose not to for personal or professional reasons - doesn't help people struggling to come out.

He's creating a narrative that even a hugely successful TV presenter can't come out without massive fanfare and trauma. But it's bullshit. He works in an industry that's always been welcoming of homosexuality. He has a well-established career. He could have released a statement saying his marriage was over. And then another quiet statement announcing his new relationship. There was no need for the tears and the interview. And, since he knows how to handle the media, that makes me cynical about the timing and manner of all of this.

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