Things my MIL sees as a sign of 'good character'

[RickSanchez]

Knowing how to get somewhere. I'm not just talking roughly how to get from A to B, but needing to know ALL the roads between and all the local areas, service station stops, landmarks, and knowledge. Not for her the use of the Sat Nav. She could read a map all day. People who don't innately 'know' the 'correct' journey to follow are Flibberty Gibbetts of the highest order. As are people who travel somewhere and don't constantly watch the roads and signs to help them understand exactly where they are at any given time.

Not sitting down during the day. There is ALWAYS something to do and you better believe that if you're NOT doing it then you bloody should be! The only exception to this is if you have 'a programme' in the evening. In which case you are permitted to briefly alight on a chair and watch it but only if it's a programme you have expressed prior interest in. Channel surfing in the hope of finding something to watch is definitely Not On.

Not using things that are designed for comfort or convenience. You may own a dishwasher for example, but you should never have occasion to use it. Surely that is evidence that you are slacking off and not Keeping Busy (see point 2). Equally, you may own a tumble drier that you have had since the 50s but why would you need to use it when you can hang your washing out in minus four temperatures and bring it in to air in the afternoon? Anything else would be Very Slack Indeed "there's only Margaret over the back who pegs out, everyone else simply can't be bothered!"

*disclaimer- this is lighthearted. My MIL is a good sort at heart but we are very, very different. I, sadly am not of 'good character'

Sounds like my late granny. God forbid there is a bit of dirt on the pram when we used to take DS out. Curtains need to be washed and ironed once a week. Jean's on babies is the work of the devil, should be lovely white starched clothes. And god forbid if you sent an email instead of a letter 😂 I miss her

Curtains are closed at the faintest promise of dusk as "people can see in."

This is me but not even 50 yet

This is definitely a generational thing. My DF believes using a satnav is a sign of weakness. Even though I've explained countless times that, apart from giving directions, it's also really useful to help you find another route of there's a delay. According to him, you should study the route in advance and be aware of alternatives .

Also, he thinks it's shockingly lazy I sometimes get my food shopping delivered when the supermarket is just down the road. He doesn't understand why I don't want to spend my precious weekend in ASDA when I be been at work all week.

DM is another one who sees sitting down during the day as a character flaw (apart from designated breaks for coffee at 11 and a cup of tea at 3pm). And as for having the TV on during the day...!

My parents are the same OP! They also have very set times for meals. 12 noon is Dinner Time. 5 o'clock (don't say 5pm) is Tea Time. They also must go shopping early to miss "the crowds" so they have at 7 in the morning! They are both early nineties! They are from another age though and are lovely with it.

I'll never forget the shock and horror on my gran and my Auntie Ina's faces when they saw me putting out oven chips on a tray. Are they ALL FOR YOU??? Gasp, gesticulate, mutter etc etc. Imagine eating more than eight chips, it's a scandal blah blah.

These things are cyclical though. My mum aged 74 is an immovable object permanently welded to her sofa as the dirt rises around her. Probably don't need Dr Freud to work it out.

I'm a nice balance of fun and hygienic, it works for us.

Let’s have yet another lighthearted thread about the funny little ways of older females

Loads of these beliefs about rules and routines have been used to criticise other women, both their peers and their daughters & daughters-in-law, and they often come from a ‘Women, know your place’ viewpoint, so I’m very happy for them to be ridiculed.

eggandonion; I also leave my pegs out; they're stainless steel, so they don't disintegrate like plastic ones.

My mother at 80 has a far more interesting social life than I do. She has at least 4 scheduled engagements a week. She also drives her friends to any appointments they may have. She is horrified when I don’t make plans to see anyone over the weekend.

Mum is also a “enough time to sleep when you’re dead” kind of person.
She cannot abide me just sitting and reading. Heaven forbid should I actually lie down! She loves to see other people “resting” though.

My ex mil thought pumping you own petrol was disgraceful. She played “cards” with her friends until precisely 4pm when they all departed to get dinner for their husbands.

My parents are extremely rigid. They eat the same dinner every night of the week and have done for years. They never deviate or try anything new, except they might have an M&S meal deal on special occasions. My mum is horrified that I wander round the supermarket and buy whatever I think looks interesting.

Curtains must be closed at the first sign of darkness, just in case people see in. I find closed curtains claustrophobic, so only close them right before I go to bed .

They're also really weird about showers. Any shower that produces more than a trickle of lukewarm water is seen as extravagant and wasteful, and a bit nouveau riche. Obviously, my rain shower (referred to in disdainful terms as a "Power Shower") is beyond the pale.

Some of these are probably coping mechanisms.

I like to draw my curtains to keep the heat in

woodhill
Some of these are probably coping mechanisms.
I like to draw my curtains to keep the heat in

They'd keep the heat in if they were closed during the day too

My lovely lovely mum is a little bit like this. We stayed with her over Xmas and she was most affronted that I used her dishwasher instead of hand washing everything (there was 11 of us there instead of just the two of them!) and gave me a look when I sat down to read my book and have a snooze at some point. She forgets I work full time and actually want to spend some of my holiday actually having some down time!

I remember ringing my granny having a lovely chat then she would suddenly say “oh my word your phone bill” and slam the phone down

Fortunately all my female relatives were great at relaxing with a book incessant housework would do my head in !

@MsTSwift I might use that tactic to get people off the phone that I don't want to speak to. Do you think it would work for cold callers?

"Mrs Sanchez, I'm contacting you to see if you have heard of the latest scheme to recover bank charges, I wonder if I could take a mo..."

"OH MY WORD, YOUR PHONE BILL..." (beeeeeep)

@Mumoftwoyoungkids I wish your parents were mine. That is my idea of bliss (actual envy)