Please help me. Tell me a nice thing you do for yourself.

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I am aching to message a person though the situation is very bad for me and I MUST NOT fall back into seeing him again.

I need to think positively and improve my life without him. What nice low key thing do you do for yourself - just something small that makes your life better?

Buy a paper and do the crosswords.
Do a jigsaw
Paint my nails.

Long bath while reading a book. It’s so relaxing

Nice bath and a hair mask? Paint your nails? Pedicure

Nothing helps that.
Delete all options. The temptation is too much.
That's the only way you can help yourself.

I too paint my nails. Always toenails. Sometimes finger nails.

Shop in charity shops. It’s addictive, helps charity (gives me a warm glow), it fills time, gets you walking about and helps the environment by recycling. Saves you money too. And the buzz you get when you get something you love for two quid or something instead of thirty quid is awsum! Suggest you take a fixed sum of cash with you instead of a card you can’t overspend!

Delete his number. Or change it to your own. Just trying not to is no good, been there done that.

Go and buy some really nice snacks and something nice to drink, and watch a film. Something you can really get absorbed in.

Change it to my own - I like that idea.

Heading for the bath...

Go to a movie, garden, do any of the things I wouldn’t done if I was with them. For example, my DP loves charity shopping, so when I have time away from him I avoid it like the plague.
I will be going to the Turkish bath on my own monthly

Reward yourself with £1 in a jar everyday you don't contact him, at the end of the month use it for a day out.

I paint my nails.
See. I do blackwork and cross stitch.
Wear make up. Sounds daft but I love creating new looks with it.

I craft. There’s a couple of crafts which require a bit of concentration and there’s no room in your brain for anything else. It’s wonderful for stopping you from thinking. And before you know it, hours have passed.

Not particularly a nice thing, but I’m also partial to moving about when trying to clear my head of things I don’t want to be thinking about. Either the gym or scrubbing the kitchen & bathroom floors.

I had somebody who I was totally in love with, I think partly because he helped me through an awful time in my life. Ultimately it ended with him being a cheat and making me doubt myself a lot.
I blocked him for a long time but thought of him a lot, and one day unblocked and messaged him. Worst idea ever. We almost slept together, but did do other things, and continued talking for a few weeks. Organised him to stay over and he left because his "ex" that he'd cheated on me with was missing and she was only telling him where she was (apparently just telling the police wasn't good enough what she'd said when I suggested that). He ghosted next and a couple of weeks later I found out they were still together, were a bit on and off for a while but had been on for some time.
We didn't talk again but I had to just unfriend him, block him, and delete all traces of him. I still think of him a lot but knowing the amount of effort it would take to actually message him and possibly not even get a reply keeps me away.
If just erasing every trace of him wouldn't work, start a hobby such as knitting, sewing, drawing, colouring, running etc. Stuff that takes you away from any devices that can be used to contact him.

Delete, delete, delete. Then pour yourself a very large glass of wine and savour every mouthful.

You can do this.

As daft as it sounds, still having his name in the phone but with your own number helped me. I could still send the text, but there was only me to read it and call myself a silly bitch when I pressed send...

Wow. Messaging myself with all the things I want to say to him is quite effective.

The list of things I dont miss is soooooo long and the list of things I miss is so very short.

Enjoying my bath too.

I'd say, think like many of them do = move on without a second thought. That way u avoid feeling like a fool if u had contacted him.

Newly single. Spreading out in the big bed with the dog. Not having to shower when I can't be arsed. Having a sneaky g&t at 5pm on a Saturday. Budgeting (it makes me really happy). Lighting candles in the evening. All these little things make me happy. The ex made me absolutely miserable.

Light a candle or several candles, buff my nails, read current book, spend time with the cat, organise a kitchen cupboard, turn on utter rubbish on Netflix, lose track of time on Pinterest.

Reading

Hi OP, I hope you ok.. I just wanna say I understand how hard it is to keep away from someone you like or perhaps loved.. huggs for you ❤️ I love to straight my hair when feel shit because it makes me feel beautiful 😌

Massage. She has the most amazing touch. Takes me to a different place.

I shave my thighs 😅 I only ever shave my thighs when I want a bit of a pick me up. The feeling of being extra soft and smooth once I’ve moisturised afterwards is heaven. But it takes bloody ages to do so it’s a treat thing.

I live in London in a fairly grimey area; a treat for me is to go to a nicer bit, enjoy a stroll browsing the shops, have coffee etc.

Tai chi class - bloody amazing!

Swam today, and made some future plans for days out, things I would never have done with him. Grounding. Thank you all.