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‘We are not sending cards this year, instead ...’

143 replies

AShaveAndAHarecutHalfPrice · 22/12/2019 08:45

Anyone else get annoyed by these frankly attention seeking posts?

No reason to tell people which charitable cause you are supporting - simply wish your friends a Merry Christmas, without the public display of do-goodery.

I’m not sending cards cos I write them and forget to post them and it’s a massive waste of time and money, so I no longer do it.

Merry Christmas everyone!

OP posts:
Yellowbutterfly1 · 22/12/2019 08:48

I have to admit. I totally agree with you.

Everythingmagnolia · 22/12/2019 08:48

Had a fb friend so this, and also felt it was attention seeking.

My mum has done it for years and no one knows about it.

CherryPavlova · 22/12/2019 08:50

I rather suspect the charities don’t get quite as much as promised...

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

lifeisgoodagain · 22/12/2019 08:50

I do not send cards. We do as a family choose a charity to support each Christmas - we don't publicise this on Facebook!

StealthPolarBear · 22/12/2019 08:50

Surely you mention the charity to raise awareness in the hope others will also support it.

dudsville · 22/12/2019 08:50

I'm not sending cards because I don't like sending cards. "We" get a lot of cards because my partner sends a bunch. I simply scrawl my name after being made to.

isabellerossignol · 22/12/2019 08:50

I sort of feel the same way, but I do understand why people feel obliged to say that they have donated and equivalent amount to a charity because otherwise they risk people saying they are just too uncaring to send a card.

I stopped sending cards a couple of years ago and have found it very liberating. But no Facebook announcements here.

Ohyesiam · 22/12/2019 08:52

Well it could be attention seeking, or they could be telling people why their not going to get a Christmas card from them.

CountFosco · 22/12/2019 08:52

Friends sent an eround robin and donate to charity. Seems fair enough to me, they send card to people who they don't have email for and they are religious so not into the commercialisation of Christmas. I do see them regularly enough to not need the round robin though!

Ilovewillow · 22/12/2019 08:52

I do both (cards to only very close family ) don't announce either! I too find it unnecessary!

MorbidMuch · 22/12/2019 08:53

I wouldn't mind if they sent individual messages / ecards / emails instead, but it strikes me as more they can't be bothered.

I send Christmas cards to quite a few people, but those who I know prefer not to send/receive them from an eco point of view, I just send them a Christmas message so they know I'm thinking of them. It can be such a difficult time of year for so many people, that a personal message / someone reaching out to you can make a huge difference in a way that a generic post doesn't.

bringincrazyback · 22/12/2019 08:53

YANBU. I always find those announcements a bit virtue-signal-y. There often seems to be a subtext of 'and you should be doing the same, instead of wasting money sending cards.'

getmeacupoftea · 22/12/2019 08:54

Yes agree with you 100%.
I've seen so much self-absorbed charity this year.
"Look at us giving toys to families that cant afford it..." etc
It must make it worse for people who genuinely are having a hard time this Christmas, knowing that some people use their situation for social media point scoring

AhoyMrBeaver · 22/12/2019 08:55

It's always announced as if those who send cards won't have also give to charity. They couldn't be as virtuous as those who don't like sending cards Xmas Hmm

VenusClapTrap · 22/12/2019 08:57

I agree with you. I do tend to see it as an excuse not to bother with something they just can’t be arsed with, and I doubt very much they are all donating the full amount that cards and postage cost to a charity. Especially when their Facebook post just says ‘donating to charity’ rather than specifying an actual cause and why that is important to them.

BlueCornsihPixie · 22/12/2019 08:58

It's possible to give to charity and give cards.

Especially in the days of emails/messages or doesn't take long to wish a happy Christmas.

It's always done in a "look how good I am donating to charity" way. When it's definitely a "I can't be bothered to write Christmas cards"

TroysMammy · 22/12/2019 09:01

I made cards for my favourite charity to sell, that's my donation.

ImOffTheRadar · 22/12/2019 09:05

Absolutely agree with the OP

‘We are not sending cards this year, instead ...’
greentomatos · 22/12/2019 09:10

Disagree. It's useful to let people know why they won't be receiving a card. Plus it raises awareness of the charity.

Likethebattle · 22/12/2019 09:15

I do it so people don’t think I’m being rude. I’d rather give to charity and avoid the waste of paper as some cards cannot be recycled.

MBM18 · 22/12/2019 09:16

Normally I'd agree as I think most things on social media are for attention but I know a couple of people who have done posts like this and they're not attention seeking type people. They are genuinely letting their friends know why they won't be receiving a card from them this year and promoting a good cause.

Foxyloxy1plus1 · 22/12/2019 09:24

There are loads on FB and it’s fine for them not to send cards and even to make it sound as though it’s a virtuous thing to do, but I’d be interested to know whether the charity actually gets the £50 or so that they would have spent on cards and postage. They seem to announce it when it’s too late for expletive not to send them one too, so they'll have cards themselves.

Gertie75 · 22/12/2019 09:24

Why not just buy charity Christmas cards.

Quinceandmedlarsrule · 22/12/2019 09:24

For most friends I know who are doing it, I'm pretty sure it's due to not being bothered to send them. I like sending and receiving cards - it's nice when they arrive and makes you remembered friends and relatives you don't see very often.

Ragwort · 22/12/2019 09:27

I agree.

I do both, I love sending and receiving cards & I enjoy giving a ‘bit extra’ to charities I support all year so I match what I spend on cards and stamps with charity donations ... but I don’t tell anyone (except Mumsnet Grin) . I also spend very little on presents and prefer to give charity ‘goat’ gifts ... only to those I know like to receive them. But no need to ‘announce’ it.