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“Ask for Angela” codeword in pubs & bars

93 replies

Rollergirl11 · 19/12/2019 20:49

Has anyone used this or know anyone that has? I’m interested to know how effective it is. Surely it’s only any use if there isn’t a huge queue at the bar to be served?

OP posts:
UtuNorantiPralatongsThirdEye · 19/12/2019 20:55

I have no idea what you're on about.

RachelAtHerBirthdayParty · 19/12/2019 20:57

A friend has used it. Said the staff couldn't have been more helpful, got security to escort the guy out, phoned her a taxi and made sure she got into it ok.

ToTheRegimentIWishIWasThere · 19/12/2019 20:57

Dh is a bouncer and knows about this. Its a good way of signalling that you need help without making a fuss. They know that if someone "asks for Angela' then they spirit them away to a safe place (office, back of house etc) where the person can talk without worrying and a taxi can be called etc.

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MoonlightMistletoe · 19/12/2019 20:58

Ask for Angela and let us know Grin

MoonlightMistletoe · 19/12/2019 21:00

I am so sorry BlushI thought it was something completely different!

stoplickingthetelly · 19/12/2019 21:02

I’ve known about this for a while now, but never had to use it. Really pleased to hear that bar staff and bouncers etc are aware of though.

1300cakes · 19/12/2019 21:07

I dont quite get how it's more useful than just ordering a cab yourself on your phone - something you can do on app so without uttering a word, you could do it secretly at your table.

Squaretoe · 19/12/2019 21:12

I used to work in a pub and I know about this, but I'm not sure many of my colleagues would, it wasn't in any of our training.

GiantKitten · 19/12/2019 21:15

1300cakes
I dont quite get how it's more useful than just ordering a cab yourself on your phone - something you can do on app so without uttering a word, you could do it secretly at your table.

Depends where you are, how confident you are of getting outside safely for a cab, the sort of place you’re in, how scary the man is, whether you’ve got enough cash...

I think it’s a great idea, good to know it works Smile

MrsGrindah · 19/12/2019 21:18

Never heard of it! Surely it only works if everyone knows about it which kind of negates the point?

EduCated · 19/12/2019 21:22

Surely it only works if everyone knows about it which kind of negates the point?

It’s less about it being a secret code, as much as a really simple way to say ‘I need help but I can’t explain right here right now’. If the person you’re with is making you feel incredibly uncomfortable and you can’t quite put your finger on why, it’s a lot easier to just be able to say ‘Is Angela working?’ than to try and explain to a busy staff member.

RachelAtHerBirthdayParty · 19/12/2019 21:24

Most bars/clubs have posters up.

SmileyClare · 19/12/2019 21:24

Agree MrsG ! If anyone approached bar staff and whispered for Angela in my tiny village local I suspect they would be met with blank stares or a "Can you speak up? Angela who? ANYONE HERE BY THE NAME OF ANGELA? No sorry love"

SeaSidePebbles · 19/12/2019 21:25

I know about Angela. And about the dot. And I would help in a heartbeat.

Bumply · 19/12/2019 21:25

The places that support it have a poster in the ladies toilets with the info.

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 19/12/2019 21:28

A lot of places here have posters in the women’s toilets. A student I teach works in a bar and told me he has had a small number of people use it on his shifts, and that it is very effective. It’s part of the induction programme at his venue, for all bar and door staff (national chain).

Shesalittlemadam · 19/12/2019 21:29

What if they have a staff member called Angela? Genuinely serious question

Redtartanshoes · 19/12/2019 21:29

If it helps just one person get out of a potentially dangerous situation then it’s absolutely worth it.

Those saying”just call a taxi” have obviously never been in an abusive controlling relationship before. 😢

ToTheRegimentIWishIWasThere · 19/12/2019 21:29

I dont quite get how it's more useful than just ordering a cab yourself on your phone - something you can do on app so without uttering a word, you could do it secretly at your table.

Its about getting out if the situation with the person who is making you uncomfortable. Texting for an Uber silently is fine, but not if they won't leave you alone long enough to get in it or you're worried they may follow you. If you're out if sight of the person then you can just disappear.

TheoriginalLEM · 19/12/2019 21:31

I don't know about dot?

Also what if Angela really does work there? And (more seriously) if everyone kniws about it, then surely it's obvious?

DontDribbleOnTheCarpet · 19/12/2019 21:32

I know about Angela. And about the dot.
I knew about Angela, but what's the dot?

MrsGrindah · 19/12/2019 21:33

Yes I understand the reason for not being explicit in a difficult situation but my point is how effective can it be if it isn’t widely known? I’m not knocking it, just saying I’m puzzled about how it works if people don’t know about it. I live in a city centre and go to many bars ( not clubs admittedly) and never seen this advertised

northernlittledonkey · 19/12/2019 21:37

What’s the dot?

ChristaMSieland · 19/12/2019 21:46

Unlike Angela, the other thing really has to be kept quiet to work. We should not discuss it.

Maybe ask for your posts to be deleted?

SmileyClare · 19/12/2019 21:46

What if an Angela really does work there sorry I know this is a noble idea designed to help women but can't help imagining someone enquiring after their mate Angela only to find themselves whisked off to a back room and told to get home in a cab.

Maybe it does work if it's well advertised in the Ladies loos (another reason not to have same sex toilets?) but can't help thinking that just letting a bar member know you are being harassed by a man and need help would suffice.