My crazy life

[Ohdearieme1987]

So- my life is crazy and way out of balance. For background, I work 60plus hours a week, as does my Husband. We also have a 3.5 daughter. But our life is totally mad- neither of us can cut down hours ( I own my business) and my husband is a director of another company. We have a cleaner and someone to help with the ironing. But still everyday is a struggle- my clothes are dirty or wrong and I eat badly. My house is a mess, my social life is dire and it’s all a bit too much. Anyone have any ideas/ advice/ anything?!

If you earn enough, outsource. If you don't it's not fair on the kids.

Yes I’m in the same building and no I’m not a childminder. All respect to them- but certainly not the job for me. Not being rude to everyone- just the one who riled me with “your poor daughter.”

I'd get my back up too if I was asking for advice but people instead saw it as an opportunity to (incorrectly) judge my parenting. Rude language perhaps, but hopefully they will think twice before jumping on someone like that,"poor child" indeed, their response was ruder IMO.

Sorry not much advice OP except to outsource what you can (assuming you can afford it) ironing, cleaning, perhaps do something like the hello fresh cooking boxes?

Right you’re out of the house during the day.

Ask your cleaner or ironing person if they will/can stick a load of washing in the machine and hang it to dry. Could they come an extra day and do it twice a week?

Cooking- slow cooker and batch cooking. Online shopping.

We outsource as much as we can, we could afford to outsource more, but live fairly rurally. So we ( and this I realise is first world) not exactly Inundated with housekeepers!

I was sympathetic and was going to offer advice until I was put off by your aggressive responses. So have a instead OP. Good luck sorting things.

Orangeteal- we had them for months. They were great! However, they seemed to take so bloody long to cook and clean up- it was often half eight before the “poor child” had their supper!

@MsPotterPepper oh back off for heaven's sake, she hasn't asked for a critique of her parenting as you well know, she's asked for advice organising life. You know nothing of her relationship with her child, are you wanting to get a kick out of pulling someone down? Nice.

I said I wasn’t rude to everyone. I was intentionally rude to whomever decided to jump on my post to question my parenting.

I'd get my back up too if I was asking for advice but people instead saw it as an opportunity to (incorrectly) judge my parenting

How is my judgment incorrect? The op can not be working 60 hours a week and yet be spending that 60 hours on her child at the same time. At best she is a nursery worker and her child gets treated like one of many.
I certainly judge parents who work those hours and yet instead of spending free time with their child they decide to prioritise the gym. It's outrageous.

Are your daughter’s clothes clean even though yours aren’t?

If you’re not coping then you have to make changes. Only you can do that. Work out the top 5 things that are stressing you out and tackle finding solutions one at a time.

You posted on an open forum and you’ll get a range of responses. Getting snarky and unpleasant isn’t going to make people give up their time to help you.

If you can afford to outsource more, is the answer a housekeeper for 3 hours per day, 3 x a week?

@Ohdearieme1987 they do a 20 mins or less range now, although they still take longer! Online grocery shopping and meal planning is my other "must".

Batch cooking on the weekends to allow for speedy dinners.

I’m not a Nursery worker... and as for the rest of your post, I can’t even begin to unpick the ignorance.

Pepper do you have children?

@MsPotterPepper so you think your ill informed ignorant comment is going to be the epiphany the OP has needed, she's going to pack it all in like every good mother should, oh thank goodness we have internet saviours like you hey. Do you have any judgement for the father or is it just the mother?

Unfortunately it's almost impossible to juggle small dc, 60 hours, gym time, socialising time, personal admin so you have to outsource more.

Can you reduce your hours at all? what's the plan when dc1 starts school?

Yes- always prioritise her clothes over mine. I probably was being a bit dramatic by saying my clothes aren’t clean. I’m not wearing the same pants or anything, but the five identical outfits I have could probably be better presented!

Yeah sorry but I'm not buying the "I work 60 hours a week and those same 60 hours are quality time with my kid."

My DM did the same kind of work and took me along with her till I started school.

It was all about sitting on the sidelines trying to get my mum's attention while she ignored me because the other kids were her job. It was shit. It was actually worse than being in childcare.

Time to call me a judgemental bitch now

Oh good idea orangeteal. I’ll pack it in, ship her to preschool and spend my day eating biscuits.. FUN!

I’m sorry for your experience Ambi.

Wow, in all my time on MN, never seen a poster be so rude. Not sure even why they are posting. Google incivility.