Circumcision Advice

[Bylamplight]

My little one is due to be circumcised next week, does anyone have any good hints or tips for keeping him comfortable after?

@JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam the difference being your son can consent to the operation at the point where he becomes Gillick competent, but would have had no choice as to the operation or the manner in which it is carried out were it done prior to that point, which is an exceptionally good reason for delaying until he is legally competent to make his own decision.

FGM is FEMALE genital mutilation . It is NOT a religious practice . This is NOT what this thread is about .

YOU and some others here need to respect OPs lawful and religious or otherwise decision to circumcise her son . Which is perfectly legal in the UK.

If you want to start another thread about your views on FGM then go create another thread .

No, the thread was indeed originally started about a boy - and one requiring medical intervention for genuine reasons, but as both practices are also frequently carried out and involve mutilating the genitals of babies for no genuine medical reason, why wouldn't people discuss them both together? There are 4 recognised levels of FGM and male circumcision has been assessed as the equivalent of level 2 in females.

Are you certain that FGM isn't performed anywhere as part of a religious practice? Drawing a definite line between religion and culture/tradition is notoriously very difficult to do in many areas. To many devout people, there is very little difference if any between the two.

I realise that male circumcision is legal in the UK, US and most countries, but that doesn't mean that I'm not entitled to have an opinion about it. It's only just becoming legal for women to drive in Saudi Arabia, after many years of campaigning, and it's legal for gays to be hanged or stoned in Iran and other countries. Should we respect this and make sure we never dare to state our own opinion on it?

Why would I start another thread about FGM when this thread has already developed to discussions about the medically-unjustified mutilation of children's genitals? If somebody were to start a thread about their daughter being bullied at school and if I had experienced the exact same scenario but with my son, would I need to start a new thread about that - two near identical threads but one discussing girls and the other boys?

I honestly don’t know how this isn’t child abuse, how is it ok in 2019 to slice bits of your child off just because you chose to? I’d never put my child through unnecessary pain just “cos”. And saying it’s for “cultural reasons” like no one can question it because you might offend their religion is ridiculous.

Unless there is a serious medical reason you are doing this and you are consulting medical professionals I’d suggest you just don’t. The fact you dodged questions about why you are doing it and are coming on mumsnet to ask for advise about how to care for your child afterwards suggests this isn’t happening in a hospital with a qualified doctor. Your poor child. Sooner it’s banned in this country for reasons other than serious medical need the better.

I Have a friend who had her boys done at different ages, and the one that healed best, quickest and with least fuss was the baby, who didn't seem fussed after the initial moment, whereas as an older child or adult its more of a big deal.
Id say if the doctors think he will need it eventually, then get it done as a baby. I think having urinary issues constantly would be more traumatic surely

I was just hoping for some tips is all.

LOL. (I’m probably going straight to hell.)

Instead of vaseline we used some sort of medicinal olive oil. It might make a difference whar method you're using.

DH says that none of his friends have ever mentioned being happy or otherwise with their knobs. It's just accepted that some are circ'ed and some aren't. It's a tiny number who make a big thing of it, but as always on the internet they make more of a fuss than 99% who arent bothered. Good luck!

Try not to worry OP the procedure is very quick, it’s the needle that actually hurts more than the actual circumcision.

As others have said, use Vaseline and clean with cotton wool and luke warm water.

I don’t understand how this now in a debate, OP please don’t play these people any mind. We got all four boys circumcised and I don’t regret it because it’s way more cleaner.

Most boys aren’t able to retract their foreskins until they are at least 6/7 just imagine the build up of dirt etc and some have difficulties doing it because it’s too tight which then leads to infection.

All this “it should be illegal” - “it’s mutilation” is utter nonsense.

You can’t be serious 18Years

My son was circumcised at 18 he was under the nhs from about 5 but the surgeon was convinced he would grow out of it especially when he started maturbating so discharged him. Roll on to he was 17 and he came to us still complaining that his foreskin didn't retract and he wanted it sorted. His fathers had burst at 18 so we were aware there could be a problem. The surgery went wrong and he ended up having 2 operations. He then took 2 weeks to be able to wear clothes, I so wish we had insisted it had been done earlier

Obviously can't spell masturbating!!

@SomethingNastyInTheBallPool I had a reply to that post that I reconsidered lol but I'm glad someone else noticed it too

I'm not expressing an opinion one way or another (although I do have one), but you do realize that pretty much all American boys are circumcised as it's pretty standard here? I think a bit of ibuprofen or paracetamol should be all he needs. You could try looking on an American website if you want some non-inflammatory, non-judgmental advice.
And just to add PLEASE read ALL the OP's posts. She makes it very clear that it's a medical decision and advised by multiple medical professionals.

it’s way more cleaner.

Totally agree

@SofiaAmes but you do realize that pretty much all American boys are circumcised as it's pretty standard here?

Nope. Amongst ds's friends I'd say over half AREN'T. People are realising its child abuse.

catofdoom Do you by any chance live in West LA or the Bay Area and how old is your ds'? 18 years ago it was absolutely standard even in West LA or the Bay Area. That may be changing, but certainly not in most of the USA.

In any case, I'm not expressing an opinion about whether or not one should do it (happy to have that discussion on another thread), just simply replying to the OP's concern about how to alleviate her ds' discomfort since she has found herself in the position that she has been medically advised to have her ds circumcised.

@18YearsAMummy it is removing, by surgery, a piece of a body. How is that NOT mutilation?

NeverGotMyPuppy Good morning, I will not go into debate with anyone on here. Like I previously stated circumcision is ALOT cleaner, plenty of people here have said that their sons have had issues with their foreskin not retracting which led to problems.

Hahaha child abuse? Don’t be so pathetic!

We have showers these days. It’s really easy to keep clean. Once the foreskin retracts, you show your DSs how to gently push it back and wash themselves. Mother of three intact beautiful sons, with clean penises.

We have showers these days

It’s great to hear that it’s just now that you’ve started having showers, I always thought showering twice was the norm.

Keeping clean is the norm. Hacking bits of a perfect baby boy is utterly disgusting.

All the men in my family and dp's are circumcised, including DS. So are a large numbers of our friends. None have suffered adverse effects and can't see what the fuss is all about - all are happy that their sons are too.

I held our son whilst the mohel carried his out - he was more distraught during his jabs.

OP - I would echo all the good practical advice given in this thread. Good luck with it all.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll
You need to start another thread because you are making THIS thread about you and your opinions , rather than answering the questions that the OP has posted , which you clearly have no intention to do .

I’m glad you recognise that OPs actions whether medical or religious are lawful , but as far as you are pushing your OPINIONS you clearly have no regard for the OPINIONS of the OP who is seeking support , not criticism and negativity .

Therefore you should start your own thread entitled something like ;

‘ I don’t like circumcision’ let’s discuss .

That way the thread can be all about you and your opinions.

This is an Internet forum @flappi. Threads evolve, people contribute, it’s the way of things.

@flappi - You come across as really quite patronising.

If you've actually read my posts then you will have seen that I have NOT criticised the OP or indeed anybody who has had their sons circumcised for genuine medical necessity (i.e. not because somebody with an agenda who happens to also be a doctor has either given their own thinking that it might be somehow 'cleaner' and gone on to state that as if it were proven medical fact; nor a medical professional practising in genito-urinary surgery yet who seems unaware of normal human anatomy in that area: that a baby boy does not usually have a retractable foreskin any more than a baby girl has periods).

There ARE indeed a number of conditions which can affect a baby/young boy whereby circumcision is the only medically valid option and 100% the right way to proceed in order to protect his health and wellbeing. If somebody has serious heart problems, they will often need invasive and potentially-risky heart surgery in order to stay alive. but this doesn't mean for one moment that we would routinely open up everybody with a healthy heart and tinker inside their bodies.

As Peanutbutter has said, this is a public forum and people are fully entitled to respectfully state and discuss their opinions. Most people understand this, but there is a minority of contributors on MN (as IRL) which seems to believe that 'everybody is entitled to their opinion, unless it differs in any way from mine - in which case they are wrong and should be pressured/bullied/shamed into shutting up'.

That way the thread can be all about you and your opinions.

If I only wanted my own opinions, then why on earth would I start a thread on a public forum inviting anybody in the world to contribute?! That would be crazy.

@SofiaAmes Maine. I have friends too who've had their first boy done but not second or third child.

I know Mothers whine put their foot down and forbidden it and Father's too.

I know 7 midwives, two of whom work from a hospital and they're all firmly anti circumcision.