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Original poster

Do you consider your in laws family?

117 replies

Firefly111 · 26/07/2019 07:32

As the title really...I’ve seen numerous threads where posters refer to their in-laws as not being family and I’m just interested if this is a popular view!

OP posts:

Madfrogs · 26/07/2019 10:21

No. If I was to divorce tomorrow I’d never see any of them again.

Rainbowknickers · 26/07/2019 10:28

My in laws ARE my family
I haven’t spoken to my toxic puddle of scum for almost 10 years
I’m beyond excited that next week we’re going to see them (they live 209 miles away)
It’s an ongoing joke that they should adopt me

Well they think I’m joking anyway!lol

Knittedjimmychoos · 26/07/2019 10:41

No. They have proved and showed me, time and time again over 15 years they do not consider me as family.

I innocently thought after dh became more of a steady couple they would be like family but It became clear we were not all on the same page, and Mil was in competition with me.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families

Knittedjimmychoos · 26/07/2019 10:48

tiida

That's absolutely awful but also hilarious 😂 😂.

How hideous!!

Knittedjimmychoos · 26/07/2019 10:49

@minai

Dh has that too its hurtful isn't it.

CMOTDibbler · 26/07/2019 10:49

No. They are people I am interested in, and wish nothing ill towards. But I know that if dh and I split they would never see or contact me again (I didn't like dh's middle brothers wife, but this is exactly what happened as soon as she moved out). Actually, none of them contact me anyway, and after 22 years of marriage and nearly 20 years in my current job no one could tell you what I do even vaguely

AE18 · 26/07/2019 10:50

Not really. I see them as my partner's family. No huge drama they just have a lot of contact with my partner's ex and we mainly see them with/for my SS so it just hasn't left me feeling all that close.

Fluffycloudland77 · 26/07/2019 11:03

Yes, apart from sil who has been vile about us and to us for some reason.

My nephews are a source of joy to me and I love them both to bits incl my nephews partner.

MsAwesomeDragon · 26/07/2019 11:07

I do treat them as family, but more distant family, so mil is more like an aunt than a mum if that makes sense.

I like having her around but would rather spend time with my own parents.

Nieces and nephews are all regarded exactly the same whether they are my sister's kids or his sister's kids. I love them all and will regularly offer to take them on days out etc. My sister takes me up on the offer more often than sil does.

MsMarvellous · 26/07/2019 11:14

Yes absolutely. I have really good relationship with my parents in law.

AuntieStella · 26/07/2019 11:15

Yes, but I've been married for nearly 30 years, and it's something that crept up on me over time.

One key moment was when the penny dropped that my inlaws are my DC's blood relations. That's when I really realised I've got them for life (even if something happened to DH)

I agree that they're not quite like my own immediate family (because they weren't around in my childhood) but definitely as close as aunts/uncles/most cousins

FairyDust92 · 26/07/2019 11:19

Only MIL & FIL not my DP's brothers and sister because they're awful human beings 😊

Myshoesarenew · 26/07/2019 11:30

They’re my husband’s family, but not really mine. We get on well enough, but have very different cultural backgrounds and expectations. My DH adores his family, and they have a good relationship with my kids. My relationship with them feels quite formal, even after 12 years together (and 6 of marriage). I’m pretty sure if my marriage ended I’d never see them again, or really want to. One of his sisters I get on very well with but DH isn’t that keen on her DH (he’s fine btw).

None of them live close to us, so we haven’t had that length of time to get to know one another. They’re also from a very matriarchal society so I struggle to find my place - I want to make all of the decisions for DC but they also want to be in charge.

Whoops75 · 26/07/2019 11:37

I used to but mil took advantage and became quite controlling.
I’ve stepped back and it drives her crazy that she doesn’t have access to me.
Having a relationship with her son isn’t as important to her.
She thinks women are the only ones who can discuss family business.

formerbabe · 26/07/2019 12:13

No.

My dh deserves better than them but doesn't realise it so I keep that thought to myself.

They are inoffensive enough but I wouldn't ever willingly choose to spend time with them...I'm sure they feel the same about me

Lazydaisies · 26/07/2019 12:14

Very much so yes.

Stravapalava · 26/07/2019 21:40

Yes I do. They may piss me off to high heaven sometimes, but their hearts are in the right places and I would move heaven and earth for them.

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