‘Adult’ stuff you just can’t do

[EmilyDeservedBetter]

I’ve managed to reach the grand old age of 30 and still, no matter how much I try I cannot:

• keep white towels white! All my other white linen and clothes etc. stay white but the towels also seem to look so scruffy after a few washes. Therefore we are only allowed dark towels in this house.

• sew. I’ve tried and tried. Had dm sit me down to show me, followed YouTube videos, tried online reading. Nope - if I had to save my own life attaching a button to a piece of clothing I would be done for.

• command with my voice. Growing up dm used to be able to stop me in my tracks with a firm ‘no’ this is not a talent she has passed on. I can’t even get the bloody in laws dog to leave a room so no chance with my DC when they grow up

What ‘adult’ things can you just not do?

Most of these, and also I can't go to bed early, no matter how exhausted I am

Spread real butter on toast.

Going beyond even the largesse implied by the expression toothbutter - I have friends who slice butter to put on their bread or toast, no spreading involved...

Butter spread so thickly as to reveal teeth marks upon biting.

languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/nll/?p=4323

I have had the shittiest of crappy days and am absolutely exhausted - but reading this thread has bucked me up completely!

I AM A GROWN UP...

I can do most, if not all that stuff...

(you keep white towels white by washing them with only white stuff at 60 deg. with biological washing powder (not liquid, not tabs - and no softener - see... I'm a grown up...)

who can't use brackets...

I cannot, for the life of me, blow up a regular air balloon. Just can't get the puff. Nothing wrong with my lungs otherwise.

I cant keep my home tidy, I'm autistic & I think it could be something to do with that because my son is ASD & he is even worse than me. I'm also useless with planning, I make list of things that need doing but somehow I always end up leaving everything to the last minute & more often than not things don't get done.

Ironing
Sewing
Being as productive as my mother at getting things done
Nice make up
Stop biting my nails

Interior decoration
Excel
Keeping cupboards tidy /having an interest in organisation of stuff
Accounting stuff, I just glaze over

I adore watching other people garden, it looks so wholesome

I have got a lot better at bollocking people since I became a parent, more assertive

I struggle to talk to adults like adults. I still feel too young to talk to talk to people my own age

^^

This is me. I think they percieve me to be 17. I'm not though, but I imagine they do!

Sewing
Having a sense of direction
Parallel parking / reverse parking in general
Cooking bacon (I always burn it!)

I really struggle with small talk and get anxiety about having to be one on one with people (apart from dh) even my own sisters i struggle with.
Most domestic things
People just seem to be a different level of grown up than me

Drive
It annoys me but I'm dyspraxic so my brain can't compute doing gears and foot pedals and everything else all at once
Not great at times tables or division either
Also cannot ride a bike without falling off

Drink tea - vile
I dunno if it’s an adult thing but I can’t get on board with all the obsessive cleaning/hinching/using millions of different cleaners and cloths. I just clean once a week and tidy in between.

Giving a fig about interior decor/getting stuff done on the house. The money is there in the bank to do all sorts if home improvements but I cba to find the tradesmen and go through all the upheaval to get things done.

Financial planning and anything to do with money. Pensions, ISAs, mortgages, PPI, swapping utilities, shopping around for insurance etc. Am hopeless at all of it.

After saying I am a grown up... does anyone else feel "less" of a grown up than some other people?

I work in a shop and seeing police/doctor/lawyer/head district salespeople always makes me feel young/immature/"less" of an adult - a bit inferior I guess, but generally less of a grown up than they are... (I'm 55!)

No because all of the police I've seen recently look about 12 - sign of being old

Yes the police force seem to have work experience kids

I'm quite a rubbish adult, I actively avoid all post that looks important, hate talking on the telephone, really struggle with making small talk and talking to people i don't know.
I also can't sew. However I'm excellent and drinking tea and wine ;)

I know what you mean BeyondMyWits
When I was a parent governor at DD's school I still felt in awe of the head teacher, and felt that I had to mind my Ps and Qs.

I'm incapable of drying myself properly after a shower or bath

I can't open an envelope without tearing it into shreds

I learnt to crochet in my late 20s, swim in 30s, ride a bike 40s. I dreaded the latter two and still worry a bit now but do them because I can (went to adult courses).

When I think about my other adult fails mainly housework and completing things I try to think about the things I can do and give myself a break. Remember legally we are adults even if we feel 17

Turn out a cooked meal reliably every week night. Not one that my ds will eat anyway.

I can swim, knit, crochet, sew, embroider, put a bra on the right way, cook, bake, somewhat deal with trades people, haggle for prices, drink coffee, send relatively formal emails, mop, deal with CFs (usually by just not giving an inch, but it works), somewhat understand economics and put on a double duvet cover.
This is all overriden by the fact that I am a complete and utter admin vortex. I get told something, 2 minutes later it's forgotten, I frequently forget to buy important things when I'm shopping and I almost always forget where I've put a bill/important piece of information, I can't ride a bike or remember passwords to save my life. I can't really hoover without missing a bit, can't shave without leaving cactus bits so I just don't bother, can't do eyeliner or mascara, can't do even 1 press up or pull up (which makes me quite annoyed at myself), make idle chit chat or not think sarcastic and slightly psychotic thoughts about a lot of my -CFs- clients. Oh, and I can't keep whites white unless they're bed sheets, so I get around this by wearing mostly black

Anyone else down for making some sort of Mumsnet house where we all live together and pool our mental resources so that stuff actually gets done?

BeyondMyWits

^^

Yup, me too. Other people seem way more adult/accomplished/mature

Drive.
Do my nails.

Bargain verbally. Just tell me the price

Cope with people standing outside restaurants trying to get your business.

Drive

Have a housework routine.