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Original poster

Calling upon the kindest of strangers

118 replies

LauraAshleySofa · 29/06/2019 16:40

Today, not for the first time, I benefited from the kindness of a complete stranger. After a long walk DS(9) admitted he hadn't taken his antihistamine. By the time we stopped at a pub for lunch he was crying. A total stranger overheard him complaining and offered him an antihistamine. Problem solved in an instant with much gratitude on my side.

I am one of life's takers as this type of thing happens to me lots. But I can never seem to find the moment to 'pay it forward'.

If you are a kind person who seems to be one of life's givers how are you doing this?

Do you carry medical supplies/ tissues/ food/drinks everywhere just in case? How do you know when someone needs something and how do you stop people refusing your kind deeds?

Please let me know your acts of kindness and how you made them happen so I can spread some kindness too.

Btw I have obviously learned my own lesson today about keeping a stash of antihistamine available at all times!

OP posts:

anitagreen · 29/06/2019 16:54

I like to think I'm a kind person for example a kid flew over his handlebars in the park and cut his face so I had wipes on me and cleaned him up gave him a cuddle and told him to go home as he had no parents around someone said that was kind? I don't really know I think just asking sometimes if someone is okay is nice.

DontCallMeShitley · 29/06/2019 17:02

I am the person that people ask about things in shops when I am browsing. I must look as if I know about stuff, and I always try to help and advise if I can.

I am also the person that will offer a wipe to the person who picks up something sticky on a shelf, or pick up a dropped glove and chase after the owner.

I am also the person that will find their shopping bag has been pinched from the clothing rail having hung it up while looking through the items for sale and needing both hands for 5 seconds.

No good turn is unpunished.

Original poster

LauraAshleySofa · 29/06/2019 17:03

That is kind, I expect it was really appreciated! I hardly ever carry wipes now so maybe I do need to be a bit more prepared for the unexpected.

OP posts:

homeless1234 · 29/06/2019 17:09

I used to work in a hospital , always carried a spare deodorant , cheap shower gel, mini toiletries and nice tissues . Lost count of the number of patients I gave stuff to .

My mum took very unwell once on holiday , had nothing with her (long story) and a nurse went out and bought her M&S clothes and some toiletries - perfume and all sorts . People can be very kind .

elephantoverthehill · 29/06/2019 17:14

My Dd was given an ice cream yesterday by a kind women. She had fancied a flake ice cream but the box of 4 was the same price as a single one, so she was giving away the other 3 to people in the car park at Tescos.

anitagreen · 29/06/2019 17:16

Another person who is kind is the man in the shop he always gives my kids sweets or me stuff for free. Let's me pay later for my shopping if my card declines etc, gave us free tickets to chessington the other day too

AgentCooper · 29/06/2019 17:18

A couple of people have been really kind recently when toddler DS has had huge meltdowns in public so yesterday when I saw a woman with a wee girl in the same situation at the bus stop I tapped her on the shoulder and told her she was doing a great job and we had a wee chat. The kindness of others has really made my days a bit better recently so I want to pay it forward.

boxlikeamarchhare · 29/06/2019 17:18

I did just that today elephantoverthehill, we were at the beach and ice lollies came in a pack of three so I asked the mum of a boy on a bench if he would like one.

Original poster

LauraAshleySofa · 29/06/2019 17:19

@dontcallme your shopping was lost! that's not how karma works! You should be walking around under a halo of good luck. I am sure your efforts are hugely appreciated.

@homeless1234 you sound so well organised and you are right, some people are so kind (including you obviously)

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TheQueef · 29/06/2019 17:21

I try my best to help people.
I've benefited from the kindness of strangers, once when my purse was stolen (there was an actual whip round in the bus queue) and once I had pulled over to cry after my dbro had died, a lady came out and insisted I join her for a cuppa.
I can't describe how much I appreciated perfect strangers being so selfless and it's my ambition in life to be a better stranger.

TheBrockmans · 29/06/2019 17:23

I think it is just being aware of what is going on around you. If you say next week heard a child in discomfort because they had forgotten to take their antihistamines, then (with your now stash of antihistamines) you would probably offer one wouldn't you? I don't always have stuff to hand because I hate handbags but I will happily share what I have.

mylittlenugget · 29/06/2019 17:27

I did a kind deed once because I was in a bad mood - I was waiting to pay in a shop and there were two boys oldest one around 9 at most. They were in their pyjamas and it was 8:30ish in the morning, their mum has clearly sent them over for breakfast and lunch things. The card messed up or they forgot the pin I think after already having faffed for ages and I was running late to work so I just went "Right! Enough, I'll pay!" Everyone was a bit shocked because I was so abrupt but I was in such a bad mood I didn't care. It didn't click until I finished work that day I'd paid £15 for someone else's shopping at a time I couldn't really afford it 🤦‍♀️
I've also offered people plasters if I've got one on me, or if a child's drink has run out at the park but I've got one I'll share (after talking to the parents). Sun cream is another thing I'll share if I can.
I think the trick is just offering what you can if you can, and sometimes even just saying something nice pays it forward. A lovely man in the local shop used to compliment my top every time I went in as they were usually band tees and it honestly made my day, if I was feeling a bit rubbish I'd sometimes pop in just for the compliment

listsandbudgets · 29/06/2019 17:28

DS once got stuck in the eat of a shopping trolly. I was by myself and just couldn't get him out. He went in easily enough

Two lovely ladies stopped and helped. The first held the trolley down while I lifted... no good. DS was wearing shorts and it was crying in pain not to add that he was frightend. The second produced a bottle of olive oil she'd just bought and oiled his leg and out he came. She then gave him a bag of sweets saying her husband wouldn't miss them I did offer to buy her more olive oil and sweets but she refused and drove off before I had a chance to argue.

It was really strange as there seemed to be plenty of space when I put him in - we never worked out the mystery of the shrinking shopping trolley and it never happened again

Original poster

LauraAshleySofa · 29/06/2019 17:34

@elephant & @ anita I think you are kind to accept the ice cream and sweets. So many people would just politely refuse and the treats would be wasted. Your acceptance gives happiness to you and the giver.

@agent I also benefited from the kindness of a wonderful cafe assistant once who held my screaming DS as a baby while I had five minutes peace and a caffeine fix. Neither she nor I knew at the time that he was screaming in pain, we had been pretty much dismissed by the doctor but I went back to the doctor afterwards and within a few hours he was being rushed to a hospital 80 miles away for an emergency operation. That five minutes was the time I needed to get my head together without the screaming noise and to learn to trust in my instincts not the doctor.

OP posts:

AnneLovesGilbert · 29/06/2019 17:34

I always carry wipes, tissues and plasters because my DC get sticky and fall over but they’ve often been of use to strangers!

My husband is the sort of person who always likes he knows where he’s going and gets asked for directions ALL the time. Even once on a beach in France when he didn’t know the area at all

Kindness takes many forms. I remember bawling in the loo at the hospital having found out I’d had a miscarriage and as I walked tear-stained and snotty out of the cubicle a random woman I’d never seen before or since wrapped me in her arms and gave me a massive hug and patted my head while I sobbed on her lovely shoulder. She won’t have had a clue what was wrong but it meant a lot to me.

listsandbudgets · 29/06/2019 17:35

I once gave a girl on a bus a ten pound note. She was 13/14 years old

She was in floods of tears on her mobile saying something like dad I've lost my purse so I can't buy mum her birthday present. The call went on for a few minutes and I felt so sorry for her so when she'd hung up I turned round and said "here's £10 I really hope you can get your mum something she likes and that she has a good birthday".

She cheered up quite quickly :)

Whatthefoxgoingon · 29/06/2019 17:40

A stranger returned my lost purse once, with a lot of money in it. I’ll forever be grateful.

I try to be the person with extra tissues/painkillers/tampons/water/wipes/sunscreen at all times now. I’ve helped out loads of people so far

You have to be organised and well stocked to be useful sometimes!

Original poster

LauraAshleySofa · 29/06/2019 17:43

@boxlikeamarchhare that's a lovely thing to do, I have had people just buy ice cream for for my kids and I never know what to say, other than thank you. But I am thinking I could pay this forward.

@thequeef this is the thing about kind people, they often do something quite remarkable for us and they don't realise the significance of a seemingly small action.

OP posts:

PattedPlont · 29/06/2019 17:43

If the cashier dealing with me is silent and unsmiling, I always check if they're okay. Just a quick, 'You okay? Long shift?' or similar.

Nine times out of ten they'll say they've been in for eight hours and they're tired, or they have a cold, or they haven't had a great couple of days, but they always seem grateful that someone asked.

PattedPlont · 29/06/2019 17:45

People have done small lovely things for me, too. I just try to keep an eye out for those who might need noticing.

DieCryHate · 29/06/2019 17:46

Just yesterday it was my son and I on our way to a beach. We were walking down. I had a large backpack of our supplies, in one hand his spade and in the other his hand. He was holding his bucket. He fell over and dropped his bucket. It was really windy so the bucket immediately started down the road. He was really upset but I couldn't leave him unattended to run after it. A lovely lady with a toddler of her own saw and ran after it (she was with her family) and got it for us. That was a small gesture which averted a meltdown from my son and meant a lot to me. If you read this lady at westward ho, thanks!

Usernamealreadyexists · 29/06/2019 17:48

I think it helps to be open and to not think too much when help is required. I think it’s helped me to help others.

Original poster

LauraAshleySofa · 29/06/2019 17:49

@thebrokmans you're right, I like to think I am aware of what's going on around me but I probably need to be more confident to just interrupt and offer some help, and be a little more prepared.

@ listsandbudgets those two ladies sound amazing, how did they know to buy sweets and olive oil? I think that one must be fate!

OP posts:

mbosnz · 29/06/2019 17:51

I think it's mainly a case of paying attention, keeping eyes and ears open, and if you see someone needs help, you offer.

I remember a poor girl who'd got caught short with her period at the mall, and had nothing with her, bless her, she asked me (I seem to have the kind of face that means people ask me) and I had a pad.

I just always try to think how I'd want my girls to be treated, or me to be treated in a similar situation and respond accordingly.

We've had some funny ones though. Like a random knock at the door at 3am, (the light was on because DH was doing an all nighter), and this girl was a total stranger whose facebook had been hacked. He's an IT whiz, brought her in, we gave her a drink, calmed her down, and sorted out her IT issues. . .

Original poster

LauraAshleySofa · 29/06/2019 17:51

@mylittlenugget I honestly have never been in a position where a card got refused otherwise I would delight in paying for someone else's shopping. I do pop something in the foodbanks occasionally so maybe that kind of counts?

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