Calling upon the kindest of strangers

[LauraAshleySofa]

Today, not for the first time, I benefited from the kindness of a complete stranger. After a long walk DS(9) admitted he hadn't taken his antihistamine. By the time we stopped at a pub for lunch he was crying. A total stranger overheard him complaining and offered him an antihistamine. Problem solved in an instant with much gratitude on my side.

I am one of life's takers as this type of thing happens to me lots. But I can never seem to find the moment to 'pay it forward'.

If you are a kind person who seems to be one of life's givers how are you doing this?

Do you carry medical supplies/ tissues/ food/drinks everywhere just in case? How do you know when someone needs something and how do you stop people refusing your kind deeds?

Please let me know your acts of kindness and how you made them happen so I can spread some kindness too.

Btw I have obviously learned my own lesson today about keeping a stash of antihistamine available at all times!

I was once in Tesco cafe with toddler DS and newborn DD. DD had a complete tongue tie and we were waiting for the correction. She was a nightmare to feed.
I'd ordered DS's lunch of sausage beans and chips, DD was crying for milk.
I had just got her latched on, no mean feat as it required 2 hands and a lot of trial and error, when DS's lunch arrives. He's asking me repeatedly to cut up his sausage and I asked him please to wait a little, but he was getting upset.
The lovely lady at the next table came over, cut up his sausage and played I spy with him for ages while I fed DD.
As she was leaving it transpired she was a senior midwife finishing a long shift, she must have been exhausted. I was so, so grateful to her that day.

@LauraAshleySofa

Growing up my mum fostered so we were used to hosting young people in need . But in a way I was repaying gra
great kindness shown to two teenage girls many years ago who were hitching to Greece and were offered a lift in a lorry who was going home to Venice . He drove us for two days ( we slept under his lorry ) and took us to his home where he said “ Wait ! “ .
Out came his wife who threw her hands in the air , scooped us up and made us stay a few days while we visited Venice, taught me how to use a washing board and told us where to stay at a nearby camp site .
We stayed in touch for years and I still remember Conzo Enzo and his family !

@elephantoverthehill

Yep that’s pretty much me in science. I’m always being called upon to fix something

Well, there's kindness and there's being a mug, truth be told.

I wouldn't thank someone who offered my kids lollies or ice creams. They'd be delighted but for all you know they've just had one and then I'd have crying and upset (they are toddlers.)

Paying for £15 worth of shopping?

I Think if you have the mindset of being a mug then you've misunderstood the point of these random acts of kindness.

You can't always know that the person is genuine but it doesn't invalidate the moment of kindness. It's not entirely altruistic because we get a good feeling from it ....its worth it just for that.

I once paid for the taxi for a couple with a newborn baby in A and E when I was there with ds, they were from abroad and it was clear they had no idea that hospital transport doesn't exist in the UK in that circumstance. They were stuck at 11pm at night with a newborn and scared.

The way I saw it ,I had cash in my bag and was fortunate enough to have the car to take my DC home.

So I paid , maybe they did con me , who cares ,I felt I did the right thing which is always rather do than be worried I was being taken advantage of. That's no way to live ...its soul destroying to keep score.

I did when I was younger and it got me in trouble!

Tbh, these days I just donate to charities I support. I wouldn't mind say 10p short of the bus or something but larger amounts, no.

People are mostly made kind. Me and some friends set up a Kindness group in our village. We organise 'Kindness bombs' where we leave books or small toys with a note for people to find. We also raise money and supplies for local charities. I'm amazed each month by the kindness and generosity of people. I find it feels so good to do good things (which might actually be selfish...probably!)
We found out yesterday the group has been nominated for an award! I'm so proud of all of us!

A simple thing - if in a supermarket checkout line, notice who is behind you. If you've got a big trolley full and they have one or two things, ask if they'd like to get in front of you. It doesn't cost anything, and they'll feel good all day because you noticed and did something nice.

I'm someone who quite often carries spares of everything and in the past month I've helped people with spare kids pants, needle and thread to fix a dance outfit x 2, antihistamines for a hay fever sufferer, wet wipes for lots of dirty children and a whole outfit for a wet child.

But then I also receive lots of kindness and sometimes I forget everything and people help me. Some days I struggle to get dressed and get out the door. Sometimes I pack like a pro.

I've given nappies, wipes to people and offered to pay of people are a few pence short at the til.

I had one of those little plastic toy things from a McDonalds and saw a woman with 2 sweet little girls parked next to us so asked if should would like it. I think she thought I was weird but thanked me and took it.

No, I didn't lose my shopping OP, someone just swiped the bag. If I had anything of value I would have put it by my feet.I have little trust in people these days, and am wise to most things but why would someone want to steal a (free) and empty bag, what an arse hole.

I do it with those free collectable cards that supermarkets offer every so often. I have no children of the right age in my social circle but claim then anyway. I give them to the nearest child in the car park.

I Think if you have the mindset of being a mug then you've misunderstood the point... That's no way to live ...its soul destroying to keep score

I couldn't agree more. What a sad attitude to have.

Not to derail the thread, but what really changed my attitude to others was my own time of need. I had a postpartum breakdown after the birth of my third child and was in a very dark place for a very long time. It was the kindness of strangers and mere acquaintances that got me through it. It made me determined to always try to be someone else's "godsend" wherever I could. Not that I was particularly selfish/uncaring before, but as a previous poster mentioned, kindness is about seeing a need and I didn't really go out of my way to see, iykwim.

The pleasure I get from knowing that I'm spreading a little kindness and goodwill in the world is it's own reward, really, and I constantly tell my children, "Look for opportunities to be kind." Only someone very jaundiced would see that as "being taken for a mug". I'd feel a bit sorry for them, to be honest.

Just been out for lunch with the family, within walking distance.

My kid lost his hat en route, but on the way home we found it perched on a fencepost. Thank you, hat-percher!

I've always wondered if people ever come back looking for hats, scarves and cardis people have hung on walls and fences.

A family were very kind to me and 2 year old DS today. I remembered this thread so wanted to share.
I was trying to get DS back in his car seat but for some reason the straps wouldn't tighten. My hand was raw for pulling on the straps, he was getting fractious and I was close to crying.
A lovely family saw me getting worked up and came over to help. The husband fixed the straps whilst his wife and daughter chatted to me and entertained DS. The husband then explained what had happened so I could fix it if it happened again, and as they were leaving the wife gave me and Thomas a hug. It made my crap morning just that bit better.
I did still cry once I got home, but it was cathartic to get it out and was relief that others had helped me.

@PattedPlont that happened to me too! I bought my dd a pair of next leggings with reindeers on they was really unusual I think I stayed at my nans house and on the journey home they fell from my bag down the road, I was gutted the next day they was hanging from a traffic light box on my road

I had just driven out of my driveway and up the road a wee bit when I saw a small crowd around someone lying in the street. An elderly man had slipped on some ice, the bystanders had called for an ambulance already so I nipped home a got a fleecy blanket to cover him up.

As the Beast from the East was easing off and roads had finally opened a little, I went to pick my mum up to take her for some supplies. As we came down the long hill we saw a wee, oldish man trudging up the hill with his shopping bags. The pavements were so packed with snow that he had to walk in the road so I stopped and collected him and his shopping, turned around and drove him home, which was at the top of the mile long hill!

These little acts of kindness can stay with you.

15 years ago (but I still remember it clearly) when dd was a 'terrible two', ds was a 3 month old baby and I had PND and was struggling, dd threw a great screaming tantrum on the floor just outside the lift in the leisure centre, whilst I looked on helplessly (holding back my own tears) whilst trying to sooth crying ds. A couple of people walked past shooting horrified looks and then one lady came over and started talking nicely to dd which had the effect of distracting dd from her tantrum completely, so I was able to walk away with a now biddable compliant toddler

Seemingly such a small thing, but in the despair of Postnatal depression I felt like this lady had saved my life (I did feel on and off suicidal back then tbh) and will always feel grateful to her

If you want to pay it forward no special preparation is required. Just start by nodding and smiling at people and if someone chats to you (quite often older people will - possibly lonely) then spare a few moments to engage with them and chat back