I went LC (low contact) with you after a final, decisive episode a couple of years ago. As a result, the mask of your public face slipped.
As a result, I studied narcissism. Just enough to get the gist. Some of the phrases/words/actions used as examples in the You Tube presentations were chillingly accurate. I had a real, 'oh I get it now' moment. Well, several, actually. Especially now I understand what is meant by, 'hoovering' when a narcissist needs to re-establish a source of supply. I see things so clearly now.
Can't lose you completely, not yet, have to have a modicum of communication between us until our widowed parent dies. Which might not be very far in the future.
So, it's unfortunate timing that you may have been diagnosed with a life limiting illness.
Before I was advised of this by you I fantasised about saying, 'congratulations' if you ever told me you had a life limiting illness but as the only one between us with any integrity, I didn't.
I'm scared at the thought of you passing away rather than sad.