Hilarious old sayings you never hear anymore.

[FurCoatNoSnickers]

I’ve started this thread having had the most hilarious exchange with an old man and his carer whilst getting my morning coffee.

“Give it some welly”
“ looks like 6 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag” 😂
“If there’s a rotten potato in the pot I’ll get it”
“Knock ‘em bandy”

I’ve never heard any of them and they need reviving 🤣🤣

Please share yours that might be new to me also. I haven’t stopped laughing thinking I’d him.

Yes @MyGastIsFlabbered. Or,
‘You’re having a giraffe’
‘You’re having a game with me’
‘You’re having me on’
‘Pull the other one’

Just thought of ‘What’s your game?’/‘I know your game’ - what are you up to/I know what you’re up to.

It’s amazing all these saying you just thought everybody says but they clearly don’t!

Note: none of those are to be confused with ‘on the game’

Yes fifth great ape

I called my son a 'fart in a trance' the other day - he was very confused 🤪🤪

Akward as Dick's hatband

Not as far through as a kipper.

You can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear.

Gone for a burton. Stood here like one of lockhearts. For 2 pins I wouldn’t bother

bruhaha I said that to my daughter yesterday, “you’re stood there like a fart in a trance”. Doesn’t even make sense!
Nan used to refer to someone wearing a too-small hat as it being “perched like a cockle on a rock”. A haircut was a “hair raid”. And another one who used “keep your hand on your ha’penny”, or when asked what was for dinner, “shit & sugar”

If you paid her back for something and said eg would a pound cover it the reply would be “no nor would a dustbin lid”

Coming from Yorkshire I still hear and use lots of these.... I thought it was " the foot of the stairs? " What am I missing? ,
"yud mek a better door than window lass"(as they say in my neck of the woods) was told to me often.
Also some other of my mother's favourites
..don't throw the baby (babby) out with the bath water...
...If pots and pans were if' and and's.....
...If wishes were horses, beggars would ride....
...run round table and a bite out of leg.. when asking what was for dinner...
As much use as a chocolate teapot/chocolate fireguard etc
And about as likely as being able to knit fog/ sand

I had a friend who used to say "ya daft whelk" .... not sure if he meant soppy or stupid when he said it....

Tighter than a duck’s arse in a power dive - always makes me smile

Clawdy I used to get told that too when asking where they were

I always loved “I’ll knock 7 bells out of you”.

‘ What’s for tea? ‘
‘ Shit ‘n’ Sugar mix ‘

That tight they could peel a bloody orange in their pocket!!
I said that to a friend totha day she didn't have a clue what I meant

If you were waiting for ages, "I were stuck there waiting like Piffy on a rock bun. " Never found out who Piffy was!

Whenever we laughed hard my Mum would say 'that's enough to make a pudding crawl'! I was the different looking one from my 4 siblings, so clearly 'the milkman's daughter'! My Nan used to say 'nowt so queer as folks' and 'them as do, does' constantly.

Oh and "gone the London way to York"
As in taking ages (lived 30 miles from York and about 260 miles from London)

Oh dear, I must be old: half of these are expressions I use regularly! The kids answer with things like 'whatev', 'awks'...

Do you think my head buttons up at the back?

Champagne tastes with beer money

Bit black over wills mothers
Leaning to wills mothers
Got more rabbit then Sainsburys

I am also curious to know who will and his mother are

Eat your crusts. It'll make your hair curl

I'll have your guts for garters.
I'll skin you alive.

Said in an Irish accent they weren't as scary as they read.

Tight as a mackerel's arse.

Red hat, no knickers. Meant wearing a red hat was tarty.