MIL never showers at our house

[Cinnemom]

MIL visits and stays with us for 2/3 nights every few weeks. She has her own bathroom here (not brand new or fancy, but nice, clean and with a big nice shower). I leave out lovely shower gel and a big fluffy towel. She never uses it!!

For some reason she has a strip wash, uses a flannel and a hand towel. It takes her forever to get ready!!!

Is it a generational thing? She’s nearly 70 and grew up in a very poor family with a shared outside bathroom. There’s no access issue as it is a walk in shower. I wonder if it is just habit now.

I know she can choose to wash or not wash and there’s no smell. I just wish she’d shower, as the strip wash and getting ready routine takes her 90 minutes!!! Every bloody morning and we want to get up and out the house with the little ones. A shower takes a few minutes. Interested in other people’s thoughts?

My mil (not elderly - 63) prefers to wash her hair in the sink than shower. In fact I don’t think she uses the shower at all, she just baths. I’ve no idea why though. My fil is the opposite and only ever showers. We once had a flat where the only shower was in our en-suite and he definitely never used it when they stayed with us for 2 nights, despite us feeling him it was fine. Fortunately our current house has a shower above the bath so everyone’s happy

*telling not feeling. That would be a bit odd haha

PIL have a weekly bath and share the water. The house smells musty. They smell musty. PIL boasts how he has more money coming in now than when he worked ft. Tight as.

So? I shower every 3/4 sometimes 5 days. Each to their own, I'm 23. I have eczema and showering hurts and takes about 1 hour including moisturising and steroids. I don't smell. Leave her alone.

Oh and it's better for the planet and my pocket 😊

@Crazycat16 if I'm out, she's out too. I can assure you she hasn't bathed or showered in that time.
I don't get too close so I'm unsure of her 'smell' but it's unmistakable when she walks past me after sitting in the sweltering heat in a jumper she's worn for weeks without washing.

I run baths and ask her if she wants to get in - she says she can't be bothered.
I offer to do her hair and she says no, even though it's now slick to her head and in clumps because of the grease and copious cheap hairspray.

I'm worried about her in general, but it's really concerning me.

As with other posters the ageism on this thread is breath-taking, I know plenty of people in their 80s/70s/60s who shower daily and have done for years, but as they have gotten older they have added non-slip surfaces and shower rails. The mechanisms that affect baIance change as people age and so falls are a greater problem. I also know people in their 30s and 40s who don’t shower because they prefer baths. Also I don’t know anyone in their 60s/70s/or 80s who has their hair set, they all have short hair, bobs or long hair in messy buns or similar…all washed when they have showers or baths and dried at home with a hairdryer as someone might at any age…Many shop at Cos, Whistles, Zara and All Saints. Older people are just as much individuals with different attitudes, tastes in clothing, different style preferences, different habits as other age groups.

I also know plenty of people, of various ages, who after brushing teeth, using facial wash, showering, washing and drying hair, doing make-up, moisturising and so on, who take at least an hour or more to get ready. Here’s a thought OP why not just ask what the problem with the shower is? I have a friend who doesn’t use one who has eczema, she puts special moisturiser in her bath, showers are drying, the eczema is in places that aren’t seen when she’s clothed and she’s self-conscious about it, she wouldn’t use a shower either, guess she must be at least 25 years older without having anyone realising it!!!

My mum never has a shower, only a bath. She just doesn’t like the water going over her face. I guess like many of her generation, she’s only ever had a bath in her home, never a shower although she is very clean and definitely never smells! She is 85.

Perking don't read it then. Simples

Simples?

You twit.

I'm a lot younger and I loathe showers, they make me feel cold. I bath every other day and wash in between.