WTF? It’s 7.40pm and a teacher has just randomly turned up at my house

[birmanbaby]

To give me new starter forms for DD who is starting reception in September

I already have a DD at the school so if they’re trying to save on postage she could have given them to her.

It’s a bit weird no?

School is a huge part of your child’s life, why wouldn’t you want to go and see things they are involved in

I don't, because I have complex PTSD and am a wheelchair user, I can't leave the house and even if I could, the main part of the school isn't wheelchair accessible.

Stop being so judgey.

lisa

Our reception teachers carry out home visits before the child starts with us. It’s nothing to do with how many books you have or how clean the house is. Many of our parents really appreciate it if there are younger siblings to care for and it’s good to see how a child is in their usual environment before they come to school.

Parents are free to decline but I’ve not known anyone to do so in the six years I’ve been in this school, but then they tend not to be as suspicious as you!

Mally I’m sorry for your situation but OP hasn’t said she can’t get to the school she says she doesn’t need to, which I think is odd.

I wasn't talking to the OP.

OP nothing you can say will change my view that a parent who never attends a single primary school event, without a compelling medical reason, is a pretty crap parent.
All jobs offer some annual leave.
Even the dads who never do school runs and work long hours manage to turn up to a Christmas play now and then.

DH works full time and long hours but has always tried to make time for parents’ evening, sports day, plays etc
Ahhh I see, you feel the OP just isn’t “trying” hard enough
I’m sure my dh would love to take a day off and come and watch one of the dc do something in school. There’s this pesky stuff called money that we need. Mercifully he has a way of getting it that means we all eat and are safe. These posts fuck me off. You have no idea the reasons people aren’t there and there shouldn’t be a need to explain to you that not everyone has the same resources you do.

My DH needs to take most of his holiday leave to attend medical appointments with me, his disabled wife, as if he didn't, his leave would be unpaid and we can't afford this. So no, not all parents are able to make time for things like sports days and concerts as they HAVE to work.

Your view that parents who can't get to school for functions are "crap parents" is ableist.

This is very unusual where I live, I have 3 DC and never once had an address check or teacher visit for any of them. Strange!

OP nothing you can say will change my view that a parent who never attends a single primary school event, without a compelling medical reason, is a pretty crap parent.
All jobs offer some annual leave.

Jobs don’t all offer annual leave that can be taken whenever the employee pleases. It’s unfair to assume that all parents who never attend school events are doing so out of choice.

For instance, in our old school, one of my DC’s classmates mums was a teacher at the school, she taught the older children, our DC were in the infant school.
She was never at events held during the school day, because the Head wouldn’t let her leave her class (even with a TA covering) to watch her DS’s school things. She’ll have known her DS’s teacher, but only because they worked in the same school.

Think the thread is being derailed now and attacking The OP is out of order.

That’s because they don’t come to the school!

No, we have very good communication with our parents (I’m the family support worker) and we try hard to encourage our parents to come into school when they can. We have parents who work very long hours or have health issues that make this impossible. I’ve never had one of them say they won’t come in because they don’t need to.

All jobs offer some annual leave.
full time carer?

All jobs offer some annual leave.

Teaching?

For the annual leave issue, isn't that why schools hold things in the evening too?

Also as said before the OP didn't say she can't get to school she said she didn't need to, which in my mind is different and does show a certain amount of indifference. DH couldn't make everything at DS's school due to work, but if DS had been in a concert which DH could go to and which DS wanted him to come to, and DH had said I'm not coming because I don't need to I wouldn't be too impressed (and neither would DS)

She doesn’t need to because her partner goes daily. In exactly the same way as most men don’t need to because the sahm provides that support.

OP isn’t asking if you approve of the division of labour in her household, she’s asking if staff from her child’s school should be knocking on her door of an evening with paperwork.

It’s fine I’m not offended. Different people live different lives.

It doesn’t help that DDs school seems to think it’s the 1950s and every child has a SAHM. Everything is held during school hours. Class assembly is 9am each term. Signing up for a time slot for parents evening is done on a clipboard in the office after school, first come first served basis . Sports day and family picnic is a whole day affair.

I need my annual leave for childcare in the holidays. Single parent here 🤷‍♀️

And I said I didn’t “need” to meet her teacher. I don’t. Want possible reason is there to meet her? I presume she’s qualified and not locking the kids in a cupboard all day. I couldn’t give a stuff if she thinks I’m disengaged. I know I’m not. I don’t particularly care if she approves of me or not

Ours were hand delivered but put through the letter box. Knocking is weird! Address check doesn’t make sense as it would be the LEA who check up, not the school staff.

Not if we aren’t the admissions authority, which is not uncommon. And believe me, we wouldn’t physically check nowadays with staff being cut.

Done on their way home. 7.40pm isn't late for a teacher to finish particularly.

Reckon an address check, do you know any other parents who’s child will be in your child’s class/year? Just to ask if they’ve had the same thing happen, teachers from my child’s school do come out to ‘introduce’ themselves (so they say) this is by appointment though but I think it’s to check when people live.

Do you live in England? If so I don't think she can have been checking to see if you live there because schools are not involved in admissions its all done by the local. Authority. Odd though.

Nonnymum that is incorrect. Many many schools are their own admissions authority - academies, some faith schools...

I work in a school and have a number of pupils live in the same street as me. I would think nothing of knocking and handing something over after school.

Want possible reason is there to meet her?

Would you say that to your child if they wanted you to meet their teacher?

7.40pm isn't late for a teacher to finish particularly

Jesus wept!