tell me about your lovely teenage son

[beclev24]

I have 3 young DS's and when I read about teenage boys it just seems so horrifying- I hear so many stories of horrible, disrespectful young men who have little to no relationship with their mothers and keep getting into trouble etc, while people describe teenage daughters as their best friends etc. (I'm sure I'm oversensitive to this but have really been hearing it a lot lately plus lots of statistics about teenage boys underachieving in school/ careers etc/ getting into crime etc)

Can anyone tell me lovely things about their teenager or adult sons to cheer me up?

Thank you!!

Mine are wonderful. They have never caused me any trouble at all.

We spend time together watching shows, jogging and playing games (I’m crap at the Xbox though, much to their amusement) they have all had a tantrum at some point but nothing that really sticks out and I can remember.

The only thing I can say that has pissed me off is missing the toilet when they have had a wee.

I know it’s frowned upon here but I will be devastated when they go off to uni and leave home. Of course I want them to be independent and enjoy life and I won’t show them how gutted I am but I will be the one crying in to my pillow.

My top tip would be to be firm with them when they're little....you can always relax the rules later on but they need to know that no means no etc, because if you're a really laid back parent when they're little you can't suddenly start laying down the law when they're teenagers, they won't have it. I agree with other posters, they need to know they're loved, that you'll listen to them, and that you're there for them even on the days they're driving you mad!

My ds is 17. He never stops talking, spends loads of time with me, is affectionate and is beyond funny.

Never gets anywhere remotely on time, drives me bonkers!

This is a lovely refreshing thread, like others I seem to read so much on crime violence antisocial behaviour.
The great teens don't always get the credit they deserve.
I look my 2DC DS4, DD10, I worry about their future, when they want to spread their wings and socialise as teens.
My Dsis raised a gentle boy, he is 14 now, bullied by peers it is sad.

My brothers were teenagers not too long ago. They are wonderful. My youngest brother used to have dinner on the table every Sunday for the family, and took my mum a cup of tea up every morning. My oldest brother took my mum to Venice as a surprise for her 50th. I now have a 6 month old son and am incredibly lucky that they are his role models. I believe my father was a wonderful man as a teenager too.

Agree with WaxOnFeckOff (love the username). I was also strict when they were little but found that more slack was needed in the teen years otherwise the nagging is simply tuned out. More listening was needed (by me) and less pontificating. It took a while to adjust from the style of parenting appropriate when they were younger and was a learning process. Nowadays, less time is spent on ‘transmit’ mode and more on ‘receive’. At some stage it’s necessary to just think you’ve done your best in the ds raising years to rear (mostly) sensible, good natured, self-respecting proto-adults and then it’s time to learn to trust their judgement and know that mistakes will be made and survived. It’s scary at times but, at its best, really rewarding, interesting and exciting. When things go wrong in their life, the most useful lesson gained from the teenage years has been to avoid using it as a teaching moment or a chance to go on at them and instead simply ask ‘how can I help?’ I have to admit to only managing that half the time but it’s a lot more successful than a lecture when they’re frustrated/angry/upset (sometimes said through gritted teeth when every fibre of my being wants to launch in to full brimstone sermon mode). Keeping communication open, by any means, is worth everything in the end.

DS 23 was and is a delight. I waited for the awful teen years but they never came. He has been with his girlfriend for over six years and I'm proud that he treats her with love and respect. He's never brought a moment's trouble to our door, works hard and has just bought his first house.

These stories are the best. thanks for the cheer up everyone.