tell me about your lovely teenage son

[beclev24]

I have 3 young DS's and when I read about teenage boys it just seems so horrifying- I hear so many stories of horrible, disrespectful young men who have little to no relationship with their mothers and keep getting into trouble etc, while people describe teenage daughters as their best friends etc. (I'm sure I'm oversensitive to this but have really been hearing it a lot lately plus lots of statistics about teenage boys underachieving in school/ careers etc/ getting into crime etc)

Can anyone tell me lovely things about their teenager or adult sons to cheer me up?

Thank you!!

DS is 14 and like a labrador puppy. Happy, bouncy, lovable so long as regularly exercised, lots of ball games, fed & watered. Screen time is really the only flashpoint. Not big on cuddles but thinks it's hilarious to sit on my knee now he's so tall. I'm very aware he'll be off to college before I know it.

Mine is 22. We have had our issues of course (drinking/weed) etc. Lots of time in his room. Loads of worries

But all through his teens he was the loveliest, nicest boy. Great sense of humour - he says things that make me laugh out loud to this day - really nice to his younger sisters. His middle sister has had some issues and he has been so kind to her - so considerate - so careful (unlike her younger sister who does none of those things which is also good - she needs to be treated normally too). He had two really good friends whom I have more or less seen grow up and those boys are lovely too.

Fear not OP. The teen years aren't for the faint of heart. But they aren't that awful either - kind of like the last terrible task in the fairy tale of parenthood :)

Mine is also 22. In his whole life he has never given us a day’s worry.

My three boys are in their 20s now. We've had a few tough times with all of them over the years but they've grown up into wonderful young men that I am proud to call my sons. I adore them, and they love their old mum too.

Ds is 19 and has a wicked sense of humour, is secretly sentimental and has a bright, enquiring mind. He’s kind and thoughtful, a great cook, good natured and lovely company. When he’s with a gf he seems caring and loving and I’ve been pleased to see that they share tasks round the house and treat each other with respect.

Recently, he’s been wanting to fill in ‘gaps’ in his post-A level reading so we talk a lot about books and often watch films together and natter about the plot and writing (to my delight, he’s recently discovered 80’s films so the last one we watched was Ferris Bueller’s day off). He enjoys talking about ideas so there are interesting conversations round the dinner table with his sisters. I really enjoy hearing them laugh together.

On the flipside, he leaves his unfeasibly huge boots in the middle of the front room for me to trip over and mistakes the sofa for a coat rack. All the hot water gets used up and the great cooking also produces a mountain of washing up. Despite that, it’s huge fun having him around - he’s such easy company - and I’ll have to hide a wobbly lip when he goes off travelling in a few week’s time.

His friend’s are really likeable teens too - there are a lot of good lads out there.

My DS isn’t quite a teenager but he is the nicest, kindest person I know. Affectionate and bright as a button.

..and the neighbour’s teen dashed out the house at the weekend to give us free tickets to an event. He mows another neighbour’s lawn too.

I went to bed recently expecting to have to make up my bed as I'd washed the sheets. Bed was made and even turned back ready for me. My 14 year old had done it because "you're always doing stuff for me, Mum". He's such a kind boy, not sayings this type of thing happens every day, but I hold on to these things when he's having a teenage strop.

My 13 yr old is (mostly) adorable. Still wants a cuddle from his mum at bedtime; thinks it's hilarious he is several inches taller than me already.

Oh and the first thing he does when coming home from school is give me a hug.

He can be a pain in the backside, but fundamentally- he's lovely.

Have a 17 yr old- lovely lad- he is a bit Saffy from AbFab- I cannot remember getting in on Friday night and he was at home on his Playstation drinking chocolate milkshake! but he is sweet and very sensible. Very switched on and looking to his future- but cannot for the life of him hang a pair of suit trousers. (is in 6th form so wears a suit every day) don't believe the hype around teen boys! Lots of them are good lads- we have good old chats most days.

My DS is 17, he's at school studying for 2 A levels and a BTEC level 3.

He joined the Air Cadets when he was 13 (they've reduced the age to 12 now), and it helped him to gain confidence, make friends from different backgrounds that he wouldn't otherwise have met, learn new skills and gain extra qualifications that will hopefully help him when he's jobhunting. He has done things that I never thought that he would get the chance to do, he shot a rifle and did OK. He also flew a plane and loved it. They offer lots of activities fairly cheaply, so it's well worth looking into. They also teach them how to iron!

Did I mention that he's actually quite shy, and has dyspraxia? He makes very good cups of tea, helps to cook dinner and helps me with tip runs when I need help lugging heavy things around (my DH has had heart surgery, so he can't do this).

When his sister was very ill in hospital, a teenager said something really horrible about her to him, so he simply picked the lad up and stood him in the nearest bin... I did ask him not to do this again! He could have decked him, but he isn't that kind of person.

I love this thread! I'm mum to a 10 month old DS and I worry about the teen years all the time (though I suspect DD will be the one to watch!)

Can any of you mums of fabulous teen sons say why you think your sons have turned out so well? What's the secret?!

My 17 yr old ds is great company. We will often have really good conversations about nothing in particular. He’s intelligent, kind, funny and will help around the house.
My 12 ye old ds pre teen is so different to his brother but also kind, funny and intelligent. He’s just started to be interested in a tv programme I watch so we watch together now which is lovely.
Teenage boys get a bad reputation for which it’s only the minority.

Rain talking to them a lot and we always eat dinner together at the table. Got lucky too I suspect.

My 15 yr old 6 footer is just a joy. Responsible, thoughtful, funny. He's not great at housework but neither am I, and he keeps his room in a good state. We have busy lives but just had a 2 week holiday together and he was ace company. I will miss him when he leaves but really look forward to his future life.

I'm not going to take much credit for it as I think a lot of luck is involved but if anything I would say the old cliche of 'pick your battles' really helps with teenagers. Always be ready to think again, aloud if necessary. if they can see you talk yourself towards an answer, they may learn to do the same.

I dont have any but recently went on holiday with 2 with friends. They were lovely. Really funny, lots of banter with them, interested and interesting. I really enjoyed spending time with them and they humoured me by trying to teach me to skateboard.

Can any of you mums of fabulous teen sons say why you think your sons have turned out so well?

No idea, although mine has his dads temperament - very laid back, calm, collected, just gets on and does tasks, nothing riles him.

Myself and DD meanwhile - well let’s say we have a similar personality different to the men!

My DS is 21, done 2 yrs at uni and currently coming to end of a year in industry. Had no bother from him as a teenager, hard working, great sense of humour, very helpful, kind, always chatting to us. Lovely mixed friendship group.

I must say he has been a little more argumentative in last 2 yrs or so, but that has come through his growing independence, and developing his own ideas and therefore disagreeing with us a lot more! He has also become a little less chatty, but again, that is part of him growing up and living away.

He does get more impatient with his mid-50s, getting-more-forgetful, sometimes stroppy mum, but definitely ‘led the way’ on a recent trip to NYC - whilst I was still working out logistics, he had it all sorted and was leading us off (DH and DD never take the lead). He also made sure I stayed upright whilst skating in Central Park.

He (and DD to be fair) are still happy to come on holiday with us, even in caravan. On our last trip at Easter he had us playing monopoly after our long walks in the sunshine, was keen to get the game finished.

He loves coming on long dog walks with me when home in the hols - even if he does stride off ahead!

DD19 has been much harder work, but maybe that’s because she and I have similar personalities. However, she is becoming a lovely young lady and is kind, considerate, hardworking, has a great sense of humour. She has just booked a 2mth volunteering trip overseas and I will miss her terribly (but not our arguments!)

You have a lot to look forward to Op.

I have a 16 year old. The bad news is that he is lazy and needs to buck up personal hygiene! I still nag him about cleaning his teeth!

However, the good news is that he is affectionate, funny, can be a chatterbox, makes me proud and there's no angst about what he wears for a mufti day, just grabs t-shirt and jeans and away he goes. His female friends whatsapp for hours about what they are going to wear. I'd lose patience with that after about 30 seconds.

DS is 18 leaves school today. Last night he asked me for a pack of envelopes. He has written to each of his teachers.

This is such a lovely thread, it's making me well up!

My eldest DS is 16 and is 99% wonderful.....he calls me Mummy, loves a cuddle, and makes me laugh more than anyone I've ever met. He's a good boy. Can't hang a coat up, or find things like keys, or put his size 11 trainers away, but for the most part is funny, thoughtful, polite and easy to talk to.

The only flashpoint we have is if he's losing when he's playing fifa, but we have clear rules and after one meltdown a few months ago even he realised how the games are stacked against the player so he was bound to get frustrated with it. That said, I'd rather he was at home getting stroppy over a computer game than hanging around the streets getting into mischief!

My youngest DS is 11 and still an angel.....I'm hoping this continues! I have a DD in the middle who is also a lovely teen, no strops or rages like some teenage girls seem to get.

Teenagers often get a bad press but for the most part are like six foot toddlers....they need regular meal times, a good nights sleep and simple choices to deal with. They are expensive though!

My 14 year old ds still gives me a kiss and hug goodnight and before school. He has an amazing bond with ds (3) and is a general all round good egg.

I'd say the secret is spending time with them throughout their lives and not interfering too much. Let them have their social media and don't snoop. Trust them above all else but let them know at the end of the day the buck stops with them for their decisions. Let them grow up when they're ready, even if you aren't. Don't try to be cool and be their friend, you're the parent and don't forget it. Have boundaries but have sympathies as well, we didn't grow up with the pressures they are facing. Be kind and honest and trust your instincts.

My ds 21 is so lovely, doesn't smoke or drink, never been in any kind of trouble. (In fact he's verging very slightly on nerdy) He's 6.6 with model looks but doesn't realise it. Takes his 86 year old nan out every Sunday.
My Dd is a different kettle of fish altogether. She's in her late 20s now and settled, but as a teenager she dabbled with drugs, stole from us was a nightmare at school and we were eventually NC for several years leading to us not being particularly close these days.
Gender is irrelevant.

My nephew is 19 now and at university, kind, organised, loving always has been. My elder son is nearly 12 and absolutely wonderful, loving and funny. I get hugs cups of tea and asked how my day was etc. It'll be fine xxx

DS1 is 14. As I was leaving my bedroom this morning he was on the landing and said "oh" and looked crestfallen. When I asked what was wrong he said he wanted a snuggle. So we got back into my bed and had a massive hug.