Need to pull myself together for the children

[Simonfromharlow]

My husband left me 10 days ago. I feel so down. I'm being a shit mum to my kids as I can't pull myself together. This is so hard. I don't know how to cope.

Yes it will go - bed down ❤️

Glad it's not just me. This really is the worst thing feelings wise. I think I've felt every emotion going in the last month. Doesn't help I'm on my period at the moment too. Makes it soo much worse.

My sis came over and we made a tinder profile for a laugh. Omg I've had some messages already!!! Great morale boost!!

Hang in there. The feelings you have will hurt at times,but it will pass you won't feel down about things for ever. You are doing bloody brilliant 👍🏻

I wish they would hurry up and pass. This is all so difficult.

Feeling quite lonely and sad this weekend

Simon - that is completely normal my darling. It's your new normal but please believe me it's only for the time being. When your head is in the right space you will appreciate the 'me' time and allocate if to getting things done and also simply for the adult you.
I promise you it will get better but it's simply time
❤️

Do something like cleaning and tidying some of the cupboards that you never get the time to do normally - I find that immensely satisfying X

Yes that's a good idea!! Thank you

I had another driving lesson yesterday. Still going quite well. Hopefully will pass before the end of the year!

God the children have just come back from ex h. They are both so sad! Poor little things

Hate it when he comes here. I feel fine for the two weeks I don't have to think about him. Then he swans in here acting like my best mate. Throws me into a spin

Typical man behaviour - rise above it as in the long term it is better for the children to see you talking normally
They are yours now until two weeks time - you are there stability
He will miss every milestone
❤️

Yeah I try to talk nicely with him in front of them. It's my youngests birthday soon. Dreading that.

My babies are breaking my heart tonight. Both in my bed crying they miss their daddy. I hate him so much for doing this to them.

Yes I don't think he realises the enormity of his decision. Heartbreaking.
But do you know, by the time he realises it - the time has elapsed and you would never take him back. The timing is significant - at the moment you just want to return to 'normal'.
Keep strong - we are completely behind you every step of the way ❤️

Yes I think you're right. I do just want my life to be normal. I hate all this tumoil and upset. I hate that I can't go a day without crying.

I really do appreciate all the support on this thread and people taking the time to respond to my ramblings.

I really just want a big hug and someone to tell me it's all going to be alright. I know I'll be ok one day but it's bloody hard work getting there.

But unfortunately yours is changing every day. You won't believe how strong you are getting - new job, driving lessons. He will not recognise you soon. You will soon outgrow him and what he perceived you to be. He only saw you as the mother of his children - you will become that and so much more
❤️

Thank you so so much!

So many big hugs 💐
You are only six weeks in - you can have a meltdown anytime you like
It's a really shit situation and you have to ride it out but you can do it with the lovely people from mumsnet as we will never get bored of the awful lows.
I can assure you most of us have been there. I had an awful breakup and did those dull word searches for three months flat and lost God knows how much weight. To this day I have never done another puzzle and seeing them on the supermarket shelves always reminds me even though it has been twenty years.
I wanted to go back and wanted everything normal again but OMG I am glad it happened in hindsight.

I like hearing everyone's stories. Gives me hope x

Just read your thread. You sound lovely. Hang in there. Time is the only thing that helps. I'm 2 years ahead of you and I can't tell you that it changes quickly. Hang on to friends and family and your gorgeous boys. You'll come out of this and remember, you're lucky to have escaped from someone who can behave so selfishly and thoughtlessly.

I've just read your thread op and I have to say, you are so bloody incredible.

It will be ok, you will look back one day and want to tell yourself that too.

Do you ever think I'd love to have been able to tell myself xyz at the time, when you've gone through challenging times? You will be thinking that before you know it, I promise you.

Keep going op, there will be ups and downs. Don't punish yourself when you're feeling down, you've gone through so much in such a short space of time. If you feel down have a "fuck it" day. No pressure, no beating yourself up for having mixed emotions, just ride it out doing whatever you can to make yourself feel better and it will pass x

Thank you for the kind words everyone. Feeling better this morning. Much prefer the house with the children here!